To Those who are DF'd or DA'd: Is there anything that you wish you could have said in your JC? (page 2)

babygirl30

If I had it to do all over again (heaven forbid) I would've:

1. Demanded more respect in the way they spoke to me

2. NOT had the 2 elders I had ongoing personal issues with previously, ON my JC

3. NEVER told the elders everything as it was frankly none of their business!!

4. Told all 3 of those 'men' what I REALLY thought of them and their twisted jargon about being 'humble' and 'repentant'...

I was bawling through my whole JC (which lasted about an hour) and had just been physically assaulted by my JW fiance, I had visible bruises ALL over, I had recently been laid off from my job, and mentally/emotionally wasn't prepared to deal with any stress beyond what had already been tossed my way - and YET - these 3 elders took the opportunity to tear me up! The experience was liberating in that I didn't feel locked in anymore to those people nor the religion, but it was demeaning to have gone through such a trying time AND get kicked out the door of the ONE place I was always taught would give me peace and love.

daringhart13

Loz,

Most publishers would be mortified what happens to their letters. They are often passed around and shrugged off....or, depending on the elder, he reads them and trashes them.

One of my last elders meeting, the CO made a gesture showing crumpling of a letter and throwing into a trash can. He could see me just shaking my head.

I honestly don't know why people bother to write letters to the elders. I served for 11 years.....the great majority could care less about any letters. Most don't read them. Those that do make sarcastic remarks and move on......ESPECIALLY if you're DF'd.......now you're just viewed as a 'so what'.....

I've told my family and closest friends that if they sat in on an elders meeting.......they would never consider going to them with anything. I even know elders that TEACH their families NOT to go to elders. They know how bad it is........

peaches

SHAKING HEAD,,,,trying to pick up heart from the floor.....((((((((((((((((((((( lozhasleft )))))))))))))))))))))))))

Lozhasleft

daring heart 13 dear me that makes me want to cry...they leave publishers with NO recourse at all ....I despair that I had such faith in them for so long...how do they sleep at night...more to the point how do they read out scriptures about loving shepherds???

peaches thank you hunny...appreciated muchly...x

besty

We were given 3 optional dates to attend a JC comprised of 4 elders - they were having the meetings whether we attended or not. We would have been DF'd in absentia if we hadn't shown up.

I did show up for the last of the 3 dates - my wife sweet pea - Sam - didn't attend any of them. The JC was an argument from start to finish and I stood up and walked out after about an hour. (One of the elders who had basically been losing it all the way through told me to sit down as they hadn't finished. LOL - I told him he obviously wasn't very good at listening - "I'm leaving")

Anyways I regret the way I handled that. I'm half thinking of writing to them too apologize, but also to thank them for DF'ing us. With the benefit of 3 years hindsight it has clearly been the best thing to ever happen to us. We are happy, contented and have met some great ex-JW friends and never-JW friends alike. We are not under mind-control and are free to think for ourselves. We are truly and sincerely grateful to the elders and everyone else that made sure we got DF'd.

So time over again....

I would accept the invite to the JC. Before they opened in prayer I would take control and ask to read a scripture. If they made a big fuss about the saying the prayer I would concede that. I would then read:

Therefore do not go on passing judgment before the time, but wait until the Lord comes who will both bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men's hearts; and then each man's praise will come to him from God. 1 Cor 4:5 - NASV

"Now then gentlemen, if you feel that you have been given exemption from this scripture by the organisation you work for, then I'm sure you will do what you have been told to do. Thank you for listening. Goodbye."*

And I would be out of there.

*Script inspired by hoboken and DNCall

african GB Member

I should have told them about the PO's son who was a drunkard and a "fornicator", but was never called into a JC.

flipper

AFRICAN GB MEMBER- I'm not DFed or DA'd - I won my appeal of my DFing - but I wish after I'd left I would have said, " Blow me. " They sucked 10 months out of my life coming to a decision. Actually when the elders initially came to my door telling me I had been DFed for not attending their JC meeting for " circumstancial fornication " with no evidence - they said I could appeal it. I told them I would appeal it and called them a$$holes and to leave my doorstep. I'm probably one of the rare people who called the elders a$$holes - yet still got my DFing overturned. Pretty strange, eh ? Felt good though. The control mongers deserved it

andy5421

http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=OjNKyoRudOQ

aSphereisnotaCircle

" circumstancial fornication "

hilarious

To Those who are DF'd or DA'd: Is there anything that you wish you could have said in your JC?

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