We have a social ex-JW support Meetup group here in Phoenix. It is upbeat, supportive. We meet once a month. We usually Meetup at Denny's but have met up a few times at our homes. Actually, we're fun, non-doctrinal, non-judgemental. Actually, we have one couple who have married that met through our Meetup. Maybe you could start a Meetup in Santa Barbara. I wish there were more ex-JW Meetups starting in more locations.
http://www.meetup.com/exjw-431/members/
You'll be fine, got to give yourself a little time. So many best wishes.