Disfellowshipped.... a question

by liz_south 13 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • liz_south
    liz_south

    So... if there's anyone from Bethel or an elder who could comment on this question I would appreciate it. I am beyond understanding this....

    My sister's daughter - (my neice - not a JW) is getting married to a young man (not a JW) in a few weeks.

    Her dad is DF'd - so is our brother.

    Apparently my other sister and her "Elder" husband can attend the wedding if the bride's DF'd father is in attendance but not if her DF'd uncle (our brother) is there.

    PLEASE.... I just don't get it!!!! There's DF'd and then more DF'd???? Her dad continues to live an immoral lifestyle - her uncle does not - he just chose not to return to JWs.

    Our family is being ripped apart.

  • yknot
    yknot

    Honestly, Elder and sister is being a horse's arse.....

    It is their wedding, the Elder and his wife are 'causing division' and should be told firmly that they do not dictate whom is invited......

    Or as Franz would say the tail (guests) don't wag the dog (bride/groom)

    Here is a copy of the 'Elder Manual' (new one slated late 2010)

    http://www.4shared.com/file/62487460/676fa4ef/1991-Pay-Attention-Elders-Manu.html

    If necessary drag their CO into the mix, call NY and raise a stink about how much 'reproach' is being brought by these snooty patooties!

    Seriously if your sister and Elder-in-law conscience is that offended, they can stay home!

  • asilentone
    asilentone

    Welcome to the board, unfortunately, they are messed up mentally.

  • asilentone
    asilentone

    yknot is giving you some good advice.

  • elderelite
    elderelite

    it seems they are making a distinction between the father of the bride ( who maybe has some right to be there) and an uncle they feel does not have a right... thats all I can think of. I would suspect that there is a family issue here somewhere, possibly related to why the uncle was DF'd. they have no organizational leg to stand on though is what it comes down to.

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    Welcome to the board. I am sorry you are in that situation. Unfortunately the Rules are to be Accepted, not understood. There is no biblical basis for this decision only interpretative.

    You can only accept it and plan accordingly, someone here is not gonna attend the wedding either way. I think it should be the person who feels his conscience is being disturbed.

  • yknot
    yknot

    opps.....how rude of me.....(beg forgiveness)

    I forgot to say:

  • Lozhasleft
    Lozhasleft

    Welcome to the forum liz_south ! So sorry you have this to put up with. Ridiculous nonsense it is.

    Loz x

  • allelsefails
    allelsefails

    Liz - There is absolutely a "more" disfellowshipped. If someone is disfellowshipped for smoking, lying, stealing, adultery, or fornication - that person has a weakness that seperates them from God.

    If someone is Disfellowshipped for "apostasy" (AKA - not thinking this org is absolute truth) then that person is incredibly dangerous. My daughter and son-in-law would be in the same room with me when they found out I was not going to meetings. I wasn't even disfellowshipped or anything, but I was dangerous. But another family member who had committed adultery was welcome to stay in there home because she was going to meetings.

    Trying to understand the brainwashed will drive you crazy - trust me.

    allelsefails - (when allelsefails try something that makes since)

  • Hadit
    Hadit

    Welcome liz_south! Sorry to hear of your dilemma. Unfortunately the WTS is an expert at ripping families apart. It is up to the bride and groom who they invite to their wedding. It's their special day.

    I hope all goes well!

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