Have you ever considered completely abandoning the people in the so-called "Truth"

by gubberningbody 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • blondie
    blondie
    Blondie, you said "I just don't make myself a target.". That sounded as if you maintained relationships with abusive people.

    Actually, I think that means you stay far enough away not to be a target, not getting close or closer. It's hard to avoid all abusive people in the world who can be people at work, workmates or supervisors, neighbors, etc. In those cases as well, the solution means eventually putting distance between you and them physically or emotionally.

    I have said many times on JWN that I have not had any contact with my abusive jw family since I left, 10 years now.

  • LV101
    LV101

    Sometimes when they aren't in the so called "truth," it's still a horror story. I avoid being a target w/my family of origin (mother, sister) and sister stopped the borg about the same time i left, psycho mother never a witness. Accepting reality is so hard and boundaries don't work because they are jealous and crazy. I can't imagine losing good family members because the religion mandates shunning. SICK.

    NV1

  • XPeterX
    XPeterX

    Have you ever considered completely abandoning the people in the so-called "Truth"

    Yes.And I WILL do it when the times comes.

  • ziddina
    ziddina
    "Have you ever considered completely abandoning the people in the so-called "Truth"? They seem quite content to do that to you. Why not just let them live their futile, dysfunctional lives and let time be the judge? ..."

    You'd be proud of me, Gubberning Body!! I was so disgusted with my parents, for a number of reasons, not the least of which was dragging me into that cult; I completely dropped the religion, my JW ex-husband, and my idiot parents, all within a year...

    I've NEVER felt so free as I have felt after dropping all of those "millstones" into the sea!!

    Zid

  • cskyjw.sun
    cskyjw.sun

    no it is not possible.i am codependant

  • CandleLight
    CandleLight

    Thanks Tec, Yes that is what I mean. JW have alot of rules that tell them who and what they can love. I no longer am bound by such, but instead follow Jesus rules of love, which are limitless.

    GubBdy,

    You said: CandlelLight - it is a truth that to accept the views of others of YOU will affect negatively your own views of yourself. You do have limitations and these are human ones.

    Yep, Im a human, and my heart hurts when they treat me unkind, Believe me when I tell you my family is one of the most extreme Phariscitial minded JW's. But their actions do NOT change my view of my self. Actually allowing others to dictate who we are is a trap of this Dark world, that tries to define who and what we are.

    I know who I am, and to whom I belong. Nothing can happen to change that. I can however, by my actions show others who they may be.

    With his love

    CL

  • StAnn
    StAnn

    My JW family has abused me since the day I was born. They were horrible to me growing up when I was still a JW. They will never change and I have finally cut all ties with them. It was very hard to cut ties with my dad but I finally had to accept that he's too toxic to keep around.

    I have a brother in AZ, "Tom", who is an ex-JW and we still have contact. Our dad told him that another one of our brothers, "Dan", hasn't been to a meeting in over a year and "Dan's" wife hasn't attended in 3-4 years. "Tom's" wife encouraged him to call "Dan" to try to reconnect. Both Tom and I responded, "Hell, No!" Even if they aren't JWs, these people are so horrible and abusive that neither Tom nor I want Dan and his wife in our lives. Dan is a two-faced, back stabbing, lying bast@@d. I'm sure that hasn't changed since he quit attending meetings.

    My dad did call me and invite me to a family picnic in June. I declined, telling him that I don't like JWs and don't wish to associate with them. So I guess that I have officially completely abandoned my JW relatives.

    Life is much better without them.

  • watersprout
    watersprout

    Ummmmm I have been abandoned by every witness i have ever known! Including carrots family............I wish i was joking!

    It actually makes me happy!!!

  • nelly136
    nelly136

    mine were scattered, so some were filed in the 'dead and gone' folder, one nearby was just a neccesary evil, (already filed) but part of the baggage in order to see my nan here and there as they were tied by living arrangements.

    my nan was the last link in my mind to my 'previous life family' and her passing was the last funeral, and final closure.

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    I've completely turned my back on my congo. I shut THEM out before they could do it to me. My mom told me a couple of times that I've hurt some people. I don't care. I have no friends in the borg - save one. I'll have to leave him too one day.
    I know now that anyone on the inside is not really a friend. Friendships on the inside are synthetic and conditional. I can do without that shit. If someone gets kicked out of the congo, my door might be open...

    On the other hand, I'm still in too precarious a situation to be able to just abandon my family. I still don't have enough outside support yet and I still have to do a better job of scrapeing my life togther. Just trying to keep my nose clean in the meanwhile. My family has been good to me. There have been rough patches but I still love them. I won't turn my back on them unless they give me a damn good reason.

    V665

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