Facebook is a menace to the fading JW! (and society in general)

by slimboyfat 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • slimboyfat
    slimboyfat

    Mark Zuckerberg says that the philosophy of facebook is that people only have one identity. I think then it's fair to say he couldn't have had JWs leading a double life in mind.

    I was careful not to add any JWs to my page, so I thought I should not have any problems. I did however add friends and family, including family members who are former Witnesses and some who are related to current Witnesses. And I added friends who know I no longer believe in the Witnesses.

    My sister (who has never been a Witness) wrote something that "tagged" me. It was a set of questions she was answering including something that asked her to write about her brothers, and she mentioned about me being religious and being a JW. It makes me sad and embarrassed because my other friends who know I don't believe in the Witnesses any more may have read it.

    What are they going to think that my sister doesn't even know that I don't believe in the Witnesses any more? I feel sorry about that, but I really saw no need to burden my sister about my religious angst. Plus we have relatives in common who are still JWs, and I saw no point in opening up the issue where it might cause problems. I thought she might have taken a hint when I bought her Christmas presents the last couple of years, but apparently not. Apart from the JW stuff, what she wrote about me was pretty sweet, and I don't want to correct her about me not believing in the Witnesses in a "wall" response, first because I don't want to embarrass or upset her and second because my cousins might read it who might tell my aunt... which might get back to the elders or otherwise cause problems.

    I don't think it's just JWs leading a double life or sneaky adulterers for whom facebook's "one identity" philosophy may prove incongruous. No one has a single identity. We are all different things in different situations. And aren't there good and valid reasons for emphasizing certain aspects in some contexts and not dwelling on them in other contexts? I think so. This "one identity" philosophy does not really promote honesty, it promotes a fake display of tranparency, when no life can be authentically transparent to all at the same time and in the same way.

    I doubt the "one identity" philosophy really was a driving force behind facebook. It sounds more like a post hoc pseudo-philosophical justification for the pre-existing architecture of the site. Despite its current popularity, I think the rigidity of facebook in not being able to reflect the complexity of modern notions of identity is a fatal weakness. Alternatives that more comfortably fit modern identities are bound to arise and displace it.

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    It makes me sad and embarrassed because my other friends who know I don't believe in the Witnesses any more may have read it.What are they going to think that my sister doesn't even know that I don't believe in the Witnesses any more? I feel sorry about that, but I really saw no need to burden my sister about my religious angst.

    Tell your friends that Jesus came to bring a sword. You've escaped a destructive, high-control group that will place heavy sanctions on you, should they discover that you no longer believe. Explain that you cannot even trust your own sister with this knowledge.

  • avengers
    avengers

    Facebook sucks!

    Big time.

    I have tried it and it keeps sending messages to people in my name even after I
    closed my account with Suckerfuck.

  • I quit!
    I quit!

    I just opened a Facebook account but haven't used it yet. Everyone in my family seems to have them and post things on them but I'm really not that interesting so I don't have a lot to put on it anyway. Even if I started using it I wouldn't put my views about the Watchtower on it because it could cause family problems for me. That is why I post anonymously here. It isn't like I'm worried about being found out. Everyone in my family knows how I feel about the Watchtower and that I basically told them to go you know what to themselves when I left but still really wouldn't want them to see some of my posts on here unless they were on their way out of the WT themselves. Sometimes I will mention that they are brainwashed or that some of them have mental problems I believe because of their association with the WT but I really wouldn't want them see what I've said even if it is true. It kind of like telling someone they are ugly or fat. It may be the true but only a total ass feels honestly is more important than being kind in cases like that. I'm sure it would cause them pain or anger.

    And in general I think some people put way too much personal information about themselves on the Facebook or their webpage because it can come back to bit them.

  • neverendingjourney
    neverendingjourney
    It sounds more like a post hoc pseudo-philosophical justification for the pre-existing architecture of the site.

    I've been on facebook for 4 years. Back when I signed up, it was the anti-myspace. By that I mean, myspace had zero privacy controls. If you wanted to be on myspace, ALL of your information had to be public. Facebook had very tight privacy controls. You couldn't even register if you didn't have a .edu email address, and only people who were in your network could interact with you.

    Facebook has now become the new myspace, minus the annoying customized backgrounds. They have become what they initially despised, and there's a lot of historical revisionism within that company to paint their move away from their roots as something other than an expedient money-grabbing ploy.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I have an account and rarely go there, but people have to be careful and they generally are not.
    People post that they are going places, leaving their home empty. They post who they are partying with, despite the marital/relationship status of all in attendance. I avoid JW friends on Facebook totally.

  • bittersweet
    bittersweet

    I like Facebook but you do have to be careful. I once was friends with a cousin in another state and all the sudden she was no longer my friend. Then I heard thru the grapevine that she found out I was an apostate so she defriended me. I think it was because I was a fan of a page about a book that was written by an ex jw. Also I am friends with most of my family, half of which are disfellowshipped ( I am not official, just haven't been in over 10 years ) or dissasociated. My Mom who is a witness friended me a few weeks ago and I have ignored her friend request because then my siblings will feel funny about what they can put on my page. It can certainly be tricky, but I still like it because I can easily keep in touch with my family who live accross the country and in different time zones and it is hard to catch them on the phone becasue of busy schedules.

  • Quillsky
    Quillsky

    slimboyfat, to partly solve your immediate problem, though not the greater issues, you can "untag" yourself in your sister's post, in order not to draw attention to it on your own page.

  • besty
    besty

    H2H with your sister maybe?

    Zuckerberg is right - applies to the 99.5% of the populace that haven't got high control group residue staining their persona...

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    I was on for only a couple months before I canned my FB account. To me it was mind numbingly inane. It was much more annoying than useful. I was depressed and on the fade too, so people that I knew on FB weren't real friends to me anyway. None of my family were there either. I had enough. It was only later on that I discovered what a real menace FB became.

    Facebook: Not very useful to me. So much annoyance and lack of privacy. Just like being in a KH among the borg.

    V665

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