Help apriciated - Where in WT publications does it say, that even close family member should be shunned if DF/DA

by Albert Einstein 12 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Albert Einstein

  Hi,

  Iam happily out for more than a year, my JW wife is basicly out as well - she didnt attend last 2 assemblies and didnt go to a meeting for about 4 months...

  My wife´s family is all in and very zealous. When visiting my MIL, we avoid JW issues, but she usually pops up some topic.

  Last time she disagred, when I said, that WT encourages shunning within the family. (We live in central Europe, and here really most JW do not shun DF/DA family members, general rule is just to avoid "spiritual discussions" with them)

  When I told her, local JW are just not strict in that issue, but WT teaches you should shun even within the family, she said its not possible and I promised I will bring some WT quotations next time.

  Since I do not have WT Library in English available, does anybody know about WT quotes, saying you should shun even family member if they are DF / DA?

  Thanks for help.

  Albert
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  wannabefree

  I am not posting reference material, but a recent experience that caused me anguish which proves it is very true.

  We had a "local needs" talk recently. This was a very heated talk about associating with disfellowshipped family members. The basis for it was a brother and sister who were maintaing contact, although limited, with their disfellowshipped daughter and her new baby.

  Apparently "readjusment" sessions were having no effect. This local needs talk was a "marking" talk, it was intense, I had never seen such emotion from the platform, like repressed anger, a scolding and warning was my impression. It was emphasized that persons who continued such conduct would not be good association for others in the congregation and would ultimately be facing disfellowshipping themselves.

  As far as the congregation knows, these parents have stopped associating with the daughter.
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  blondie

  There is a way around this; it is called "necessary family" business. Many elders in this area use this to have contact with df'd family and the other elders allow it (never know when they will need it).

  *** w07 1/15 p. 20 Remaining Steadfast When a Child Rebels ***While caring for necessary family matters may require some contact with the disfellowshipped person, a Christian parent should strive to avoid needless association.

  *** w83 1/1 p. 31 Questions From Readers ***Of course, the grandparents have to determine if some necessary family matters require limited contact with the disfellowshipped children. And they might sometimes have the grandchildren visit them.

  *** w81 9/15 p. 29 par. 18 If a Relative Is Disfellowshiped . . . ***The second situation that we need to consider is that involving a disfellowshiped or disassociated relative who is not in the immediate family circle or living at one’s home. Such a person is still related by blood or marriage, and so there may be some limited need to care for necessary family matters.
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  Joey Jo-Jo

  Hi,

  What about people that had been in truth but never been bathtised and then labeled as apostates?

  Also what about a situation which forces you to live with your parents for a certain time?
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  wannabefree

  "necessary family business" - who decides what this is? is this defined somewhere? I know it is heavily suggested that this is VERY limited, such as ill health, funeral arrangements, discussing a will, legal matters ... I imagine enforcement depends do a degree on the BOE.
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  Bonnie_Clyde

  "Keep Yourself in God's Love" page 208, 209, "In other cases, the disfellowshipped relative may be living outside the immediate family circle and home. Although there might be a need for limited contact on some rare occasion to care for a necessary family matter, any such contact should be kept to a minimum. Loyal Christian family members do not look for excuses to have dealings with a disfellowshipped relative not living at home. Rather, loyalty to Jehovah and his organization moves them to uphold the Scriptural arrangement of disfellowshipping."

  Bonnie
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  blondie

  There is no definition of "necessary family matters" in the WT publications...that is the beauty of it and elders know how to use this loophole.
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  Albert Einstein

  Thank you very much Blondie, thats exactly what I needed! I wish I could take you out for a coffee some day - but its just to far...!

  Bonnie+Clyde - thats also a great quote, thanks!

  Albert
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  transhuman68

  “Cutting off from the Christian congregation does not involve immediate death, so family ties continue. Thus, a man who is disfellowshipped or who disassociates himself may still live at home with his Christian wife and faithful children. … The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living outside the immediate family circle and home. It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum, in line with the divine principle: “Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person [or guilty of another gross sin], … not even eating with such a man.” (1 Corinthians 5:11.) Understandably, this may be difficult because of emotions and family ties, such as grandparents’ love for their grandchildren. — Watchtower, April 15, 1988, p.27

  Found this on the net- you would have to check it is an accurate quote...

  Maybe someone with the WT CD could confirm this?
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  besty

  might find some here:

  http://knol.google.com/k/why-jehovah-s-witnesses-practice-religious-shunning#