An email I got. I don't know how to respond

by lil.lady.03 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • cognizant dissident
    cognizant dissident

    Probably the easiest way to get them to leave you alone is to ignore emails and phone messages like that one. People feed off response. Don't give them any fuel and they will die out. It may take 30-90 days, but they will eventually die out. In fact, you will be amazed at how quickly they really do forget all about you and that will be another time of vulnerability that might tempt you back.

    Because everyone needs to feel special and important and have a sense of belonging to some sort of social group. Find something else to replace it otherwise, nature abhors a vacuum and you might be sucked back in.

  • brotherdan
    brotherdan

    lil.lady, you have a PM

  • 3Mozzies
    3Mozzies

    I feel for you, wow that email was a little full on:

    But we need you with the rest of us at the Kingdom Hall. We are all fighting together and we need each other to make it through.

    She's using GUILT here to get you to come back!

    Don't let Satan take you away from us because that is what he is doing right now.

    Now she's using FEAR to get you to come back!

    I have avoided contact with the very few who tried to get me to come back to THEM & this Organisation.

    I have not opened my door to them and I let them know 'point blank' no thank you, no problem with me so no need for your help. Obviously every case is different, do what you need to do. It's not easy at the start but believe me it DOES get better with time, the sooner you start the sooner this hell ends.

    At the start I couldn't sleep, I use to get blood noses from the pressure I was feeling (never had blood noses before in my life) and I really felt like my world was spinning out of control. Now life is amazing and I will NEVER step foot in a KH again (apart from a wedding or funeral, even then I would feel like not going)

    Take your time, don't rush anything, get your head right and in time things will be very clear.

    3Mozzies

  • NiceDream
    NiceDream

    I would ignore it if possible. With time, things will get better.

    This is a nice scripture that helped me feel better about missing meetings:

    Ephesians 2:8-10 (New International Version)

    8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast.

    JWs are so focused on works, they try and use guilt and fear to keep us captives.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Change your email address, or block unwanted people.

    Get caller ID for your phone, or change your number. Disable voicemail.

    Put Xmas decorations on your front door.

    Go to the pub on meeting nights, or find a group to join. Handcrafts? Photography? or anything else you think you might enjoy. Volunteer for something. Soup kitchen? Helping a neighbor?

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    The Matrix analogy isn't silly at all. Many here have used that analogy, as well. You have taken the red pill and it is very difficult to swallow all that goes with that knowledge.

    I was in a foreign language, too. I'll send you a PM about it...maybe we know some of the same people.

  • lil.lady.03
    lil.lady.03

    @ black sheep. that is funny you would say to change my number,

    back in the early spring the elders told me to change my number so my bf wouldn't get in contact with me.

    the other day I was thinking, 'Hmmm maybe I should change my number so the elders can't call me. HA!"

    Go figure.

  • flipper
    flipper

    LADY.03 - Don't allow anybody to coerce you to do something you aren't comfortable doing. If you are happy away from the meetings- continue in that direction ! You don't owe anybody at the congregation any explanations of why you don't go. They may GUILT you into thinking you owe them an explanation- but in reality- you don't. I agree with the advice to read Steve Hassan's " Combatting Cult Mind Control". It will help you see why these people are SO insistent on getting you back. It's dangerous to go back as your mind may be hypnotized by the mind control again. I agree with others - stay busy and away from the kingdom hall ! Make new friends

  • Balsam
    Balsam

    Just ignore it like you didn't even get it, and if she asks just say you must have missed it.

    A young sister who was trying to fade did that to me when I emailed her encouraging her to come to meetings. Of course I had no idea she was trying to leave without a ruccus. She was polite to my face and just never responded to any emails or calls. It worked I left her alone finally.

    Balsam

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    If it's not broken, don't fix it.

    You are happy now.

    You know you would not be happy going back.

    If you choose to answer it, I'd just say, "I don't want to ruin my happiness by going back, but thank you for thinking of me."

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