by bez 29 Replies latest jw experiences
WOW, that is crazy. I probably am going to get some visits or calls soon too as my ex (active Jdub) knows I celebrated my DD's bday now. It almost makes me giggle if they DF me for that. I have the elder's numbers programed on my cell phone still, so if they call, caller ID should set me off...maybe.
Keep us updated, this is so crappy.
If it makes you feel better, my mom has nothing to do with me also.
So sorry to hear you're going through this Bez.
I know a couple who were announced they were no longer witnesses after they asked a question about the UN scandal. The elders never came back and taked to them or anything. But every case is different.
You have the right to take time and figure out if your Mom will be able to see your children and on what terms. Don't let her guilt you because of the consequences of her own choices. You never chose to be in this religion. It's not your fault.
Amazing how people expect their DFd children (whom they are treating like dirt) to expose their own children to diatribes about how mom and dad are opposers of Jehovah who are going to get them all wiped out at Armageddon.
I thought I heard that birthdays were a matter of conscience now. But I guess not.
So sorry to hear your troubles. The birthday thing and Xmas, all this can be used to say you disassociated yourselves if they don't want to pursue the judicial process.
As for Mom, you all have to decide how to deal with her requests to see the grandkids. As difficult as depriving kids of grandparents is, I am confident that Grandma will continue to indoctrinate them. I would choose to say "We are a package family, we all come together." But that's me. I might take the kids to counseling to help explain that. It could be done in one or two sessions. They might want to say stuff about the JW's anyway.
Strength to you.
What has happened to you,reminds me of the inquisition ot the 13th/14th century.How the hierarchy ot the R.C.church(FDS/GB) questioned the R&F as to the loyalty to the R.C.church(WBTS).Under torture(shunninig).
B
I say this tongue in cheek (partly anyway! ) to those with difficult parents:
When you know you are to be disfellowshipped, write a letter to your mom and copy in individually the body of elders, and everyone in the congregation for whom you have an address.
Dear Mom,
I understand you are having difficulty with how you view the rules of your religion. I also understand you wish to see your grandchildren. You may do so.
However, we live in an age where a few people are abusive to children; either physically, sexually or are poisonous to them, either verbally or by their actions (they may even shun their children's parents - can you believe that?!). To protect our children we have decided that certain folk may only see our children when in the presence of their parents and we include you in this category.
If over time you can show that you show respect to us as their parents for our beliefs then we may extend this privilege further; but we know that at present the strictures of your religion, their enforcing by congregation elders and your own intransigence stops this.
For our part we undertake, out of respect for your faith, never to mention your religion in your presence and further agree to only discuss necessary family matters with you. This will include civility and decency in the way we talk to each other including customary greetings.
Please contact us soonest to come and see Damien, Lolita and baby Bundy, we will have coffee and cakes prepared.
I do hope you understand,
Your ever loving son and daughter-in-law,
Clyde and Bonnie
X
Your mother has huge balls to think she can totally shun you and you, in turn, need to give her the right to see her grand children.
Send her to the same hell she created for you.
Farkel
Would you let your parents have unsupervised visits if they were members of any other high control cult or cult-like group especially when their purpose is to convert and indoctrinate?
wannabefree... no! i wouldnt..
I am watching this space, i am not gonna make a huge deal of it right now .. (not letting her see my children) as i dont actually think she will make the effort anyway. But when she does make the effort she will get a shocker.
No way would she have anything to do with my kids when she wont have anything to do with us.. And when my kids grow up and ask why they never saw her much.. they will know the details.. and i am sure will agree with our decision and be just as disgusted as us...
Im sure not everyone is like her in the 'truf' but she is mental and i think a classic example of most in there!
