Twitch, maybe the relationship will work out itself, he needs to come here and discuss his options. Twitch, you were a witness, he has not been to the meetings in a long time.
Need advice about JW boyfriend
by tryingtolove 39 Replies latest social relationships
-
-
cyberjesus
the JWs are a mind control cult. There is much more at stake than you can imagine. Does he believe them to have "The truth". ?
-
Twitch
AS1 Perhaps, but I know what I was like when stuck between two worlds. Your mileage may vary but not by much. My 2 cents
-
wannabefree
I second the get out. This guy, as long as he holds on to the possibility that JW's are the truth, is hopeless, there will always be the part that wants to go back, wants any kids to be raised in "the truth".
-
moshe
This guy is a dishonest loser who will end up lying to YOU sooner or later. Leave him know and find someone who is proud of you and proud to be with you.
Nate, I couldn't have said it any better-
He is not a loser!!!!!!! He is in a very hard situation!!!!!!!!!
Yes, the situation is called, being a doormat- will he ever get a real backbone and his own man? The odds are against him, as long as his family are still JWs.
-
Twitch
Addendum: when he grows a pair and tells u without doubt that you're the woman for him, then you can take it to the bank. Until then, all bets are off. No woman deserves less.
-
wasblind
your not the only one going through this type of relationship maybe reading this will give you some insight
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/members/private/198427/1/lived-in-sin
-
yknot
Glad you joined!
Lets get some perspective and balance here....
He was raised JW so he is going to have some social/emotional setbacks..... (he can grow from this)
He is living with you...... so he has already chosen you to some extent.
Now what needs to happen is he needs to have a greater base of support. Sometimes just simply knowing others are experiencing and feeling similar things makes us feel okay.....
So I agree with ASO..... please introduce him to our little site, get him to join and actively start talking about the elephant known as the WTS.
-
Coffee House Girl
I am speaking to you from your boyfriend's exact situation- I am the JW and my BF and I live together- I have not told my parents yet ( I am planning to tell my non-JW dad next week when JW mom is gone a religious assembly Saturday and Sunday & I hope to introduce dad to my BF)
I am also afraid that my devout JW mom will shun me if she finds out, I stopped going to meetings a year ago, joined this website 7 months ago, read books to help deprogram myself from the mind-control cult
it has taken time to mentally get through the turmoil of leaving the cult and readjusting my mind to it all
I am completely committed to my BF, & I am a relationship oriented person- I want to see our love and relationship grow, I want to marry him, and I do not want to go back to the cult
All of this has taken time, but the fear of loosing my mom is still there (she still allows me to come by, but I fear that she will reject me once she finds out that I am not returning and I am in love and live with a non-JW man)
My two cents is- open and honest communication about both of your feelings on religion, committment, and the direction of your relationship
trust me he needs to talk about this with you- it is a gut wrenching decision for him, but that doesn't mean he will abandon you.
CHG
-
diamondiiz
Hello Tryingtolove;
If your boyfriend still thinks that watchtower is the truth tell him to examine the history and do research because what you want to know is if he is a believer or not. If he is a believer he will return to the watchtower sooner or later with or without you. If he is a believer but is willing to do research you have a chance. If he says he doesn't believe it without knowing why ask him why he thinks it's not the truth since he may just be just telling you what you want to hear. It's important what he believes because wts isn't like any religion but it's a high control group and if he is a believer you may have hard time being with him down the road. I'm not going to say you will have hell of a life since not all witnesses are the same as people go but generally speaking it's better not to be with a believer.
