Help me become a real CRAZY FUNDIE ATHEIST parent!

by bohm 65 Replies latest jw friends

  • bohm
    bohm

    Hello friends!

    Once in a while you hear about fundie atheists, and I have desided to become one. But i need a bit of advice.

    You see, apparently the fundie atheists are as messed up as their worst religious "fundie" counterparts, so i got some expectations to live up to.

    I have desided to focus on how i should raise my child, since the religious dickery i hate the most has to do with how children are raised.

    To state it shortly, I need the absolute worst fundie atheist child care practices. The most hardcore, outrageous, unsafe and unethical things you can drill into their vulnurable minds, to make sure they are messed up; the kind of stuff that would make the average crazy babtist flinch.

    The atheist equivalent of showing "the passion of the christ" to a 4 years old, of telling them mom will burn forever and ever in hell, that God hate them because they are sinners and there is a demon behind every tree. That masturbation make jesus cry (and them turn out gay), that sex is awfull, of genetial mutilation on girls and letting them die over a blood transfusion. Of disowning them if they turn out to be gay, shunning them for having christmas, or living without electricity because Satan invented it.

    BUT it has to be ATHEIST approved stuff. Not something that is just made up, rather something that real, fundie atheists actually do on a regular basis and is attached to our belief. And no mundane "uuuuhhh, evolution is true, the pope is dillusional and i dont want my kid to pray"-crap; LASTING DAMAGE AND CHILDHOOD TRAUMA is what we are aiming at!

    So lets show those religious people that fundie atheists are every bit as dangerous and outrageously stupid as their fundie religious counterparts -- that fundie atheist is not just a rather empty label some like to throw about in a discussion.

  • bohm
    bohm

    whats up, are people to angry to comment?

  • journey-on
    journey-on
    To state it shortly, I need the absolute worst fundie atheist child care practices. The most hardcore, outrageous, unsafe and unethical things you can drill into their vulnurable minds, to make sure they are messed up; the kind of stuff that would make the average crazy babtist flinch.

    Ok. I'll choose the above part of your post. I'll use an experience of which I have a personal knowledge (the names have been changed to protect the innocent ;-):

    Susie returned from the funeral of her grandmother with a heavy heart. Her mother tried to console her, but being a staunch fundie atheist, her words seemed bland and mundane. "Grandma had a good life. We live, we die, and leave behind people we love to carry on doing good things. Just remember all the good times you had with her and take to heart her fine example."

    A few nights later, Susie lay in bed thinking about her grandmother. As clear as could be, she "felt" her near. She drifted near the sleep state, and although not exactly audibly, she "heard" her grandmother's voice say "I love you, Susie. I'm fine. I'm with Granddad and Uncle Stew." Susie smiled and then fell asleep happy. The next morning she was joyful and animated as she came to the breakfast table convinced in her heart that all is right in the world and everything has meaning. Something else awaits us.

    But, it wasn't long before her mother ripped that hope right out of her little heart. The tiny ounce of faith Susie felt was squashed with her mother's firm words after hearing her daughter's recount of her experience last night. "How silly, child. There is absolutely no such thing. You are either having an emotional or mental problem, or you were dreaming, plain and simple. Your Grandmother, Granddad, and Uncle Stew are dead and gone, never to be seen again, so get that dumb notion out of your head right now. You were just imagining the whole thing." Never trust yourself.

  • Joshinaz
    Joshinaz

    BOHM--Your kidding right? You gotta find some balance. Lets not tip the scale the other way and TRY to mess our children. I suppose your trying to go extreme (other way) because your angry? I don't think we are seeing the whole side of this story.

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    You can teach them that no matter how often they pray the sun will burn in 5 billion years, and that their atoms which are gonna be all over the earth by then will return to the sun (which most of them started there originally)

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    Tell them that the stars in the universe that they see is only an illusion, that many of the stars they see dont even exist anymore. That will make them cry.

    And that when they read the horoscope telling them they are gonna have a good day is a lie. Because they can make everyday be a good day.

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    Tell them that no matter how hard we pray before meals if they dont wash their hands the microbes wont die and they could get sick and their tummy will hurt

  • bohm
    bohm

    journey-on: bad judgement, lack of compassion, no sensitivity - clearly a good atheist parenting experience I can use!

    Is it possible to spice it up and get something equivalent of "no susie dear, because grandma is getting tortured as we speak"?

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    MAke them suffer, tell them that Santa Clause is an imaginary Character and that he doesnt exists. HE WILL NOT BRING THEM GIFTS even if they behave. But that you will be very happy if they listen to you and you will give them gifts because of your love.

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    All the baby dinosaurs even the little ones died by fire, asphyxia or frozen to death when a meteorite hit the earth millions of years ago.

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