WHY? WHY? WHY?

by Reopened Mind 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • Reopened Mind
    Reopened Mind

    WHY? WHY? WHY?

    That’s the question I keep asking myself once I began learning “the truth about ‘the truth’”. What is truth? One definition according to Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary is “the body of real things, events, and facts”. Another (often cap) is “a transcendent, fundamental or spiritual reality”. Anyway I digress. What I really want to know from myself is WHY WAS I SO GULLIBLE? I am not a born-in like my husband or my children. I was converted, convinced, sold a bill of goods that I swallowed hook, line, and sinker. I prided myself on researching while studying with the Witness girls at school. I was 13/14 when I first met them. I loved science. I believed evolution. I called myself agnostic. I listened to their arguments, then devoured every book in the school library on evolution to see how to counter their statements. The year was 1966/67. Way before the internet. I found living on a paradise earth very appealing. Who wouldn’t want to live forever in ideal conditions? I already knew I didn’t want to go to heaven and I didn’t believe in a torturous hell. They also promised a large, loving family; why they called each other “brother” and “sister”. Jehovah was our father. And our mother? I was beguiled.

    The Sixties were a tumultuous time. It was easy to convince me we were living in the last days. Nuclear war was a very real threat. Armageddon was just around the corner, less than a decade away. My parents didn’t like me studying with the Witness girls. But of course this was just more proof that this was the “truth”. At the book studies they were covering the book “Babylon the Great Has Fallen-God’s Kingdom Rules”. I had never heard Revelation explained in the small country church I attended as a young girl. Very frightening. They explained everything in great detail. My studious self ate it up. How did they know all of this? I was still somewhat cautious. I wanted to know the history of Jehovah’s Witnesses before I committed to them. The only source available to me at the time was the book “Jehovah’s Witness in the Divine Purpose”. My reasoning then was that if I wanted to know their history the best place to go would be to the Witnesses themselves. I was an honest and naïve young girl.

    I was a truthful person. I told the truth. I believed people told me the truth. I was unaware of the intricacies of lying. They called their way of believing THE TRUTH. So naturally I was hooked.

    One thing that bothered me from the beginning was that women were in subjection to men because they were men. I had always considered myself equal to any boy and superior to many. Somewhere along the line I contented myself to “wait on Jehovah”. Surely someday “new light” would be revealed and we women would take our rightful place beside men, not underneath them. I take a broader view now; everyone has their individual strengths and weaknesses regardless of gender.

    Steve Hassan in his book “Combating Cult Mind Control” showed that cults look to recruit young idealistic people who want to be part of something larger than themselves. The Witnesses continually said they were looking for people who were “sighing and crying over the detestable things in the world”. (This after they listed what those “detestable things” were.) When I look back I see I was a prime target. My parents were unprepared to counter the arguments the Witnesses were presenting.

    On the day my youngest son was born I was told he wouldn’t live the day out if I didn’t allow him to have a blood transfusion. I stood firm in my refusal. Not only did he survive, he thrived. And so I continued to staunchly support the Watchtower’s position of refusing all blood. …Until I read an article in the newspaper by Kerry Louderback-Wood. She mentioned a website ajwrb.org. I logged on and read everything there. That led me to freeminds, JWD, and others. My mind was reopened!

    Unbeknownst to me my husband, the PO at the time, was having some serious questions about the validity of a global flood. He had been researching that. We began talking and I cautiously began sharing what I was learning with him. He eagerly read everything I showed him. He requested that I order Ray Franz’ books and Steve Hassan’s books as well as several other books. We both devoured them. We have shared what we learned with our two grown boys, both baptized Witnesses, and they too can see the truth about “the truth”.

    I have returned to my love of science (I have missed so much!), my belief in evolution, and my agnostic leaning, though now I prefer the term secular humanist. I have told my husband and my boys that I love them unconditionally. As much as I can I am making up for all the lost years in the Watchtower Prison. My husband still serves as an elder and I am still considered in good standing in the local congregation. We have laid our plans for an exit from the Watchtower. We are hoping we can do it in a way that we can continue to have a good relationship with our daughters-in-law and our grandchildren.

  • tec
    tec

    Welcome Reopened Mind,

    Somewhere along the line I contented myself to “wait on Jehovah”. Surely someday “new light” would be revealed

    Funny that I had convinced myself of this too (regarding Michael as Jesus), even though at the time that voice in my head was saying, "why would you know something now that God's organization did not? Does it really make sense that you're just waiting for them to catch up to you?"

    Tammy

  • sabastious
    sabastious

    Reopened Mind, you story is inspirational!

    Just this first post of yours will help others follow the same path of enlightenment you have been on for some time.

    CHEERS TO ALL YOUR HARD WORK!

    It has paid off greatly.

    Welcome to the forum!

    -Sab

  • sabastious
    sabastious
    "why would you know something now that God's organization did not? Does it really make sense that you're just waiting for them to catch up to you?"

    Nice, I love the logic here Tammy.

    -Sab

  • journey-on
    journey-on

    Welcome to JWN, Reopened Mind. I see you joined in June. Glad you decided to post your story. It's easy to feel anger, disappointment, and even incredulity that we bought into something that we couldn't possibly buy into today. I was raised a witness, so I began to have doubts as a young woman about the time you were beginning to buy into it. Funny. As you were leaving your hunger for secular knowledge, I was beginning to crave it. We're all on a journey of self-revelation. Thanks for sharing yours.

  • LV101
    LV101

    "why was i so gullible" --- ahhh, because we all want to live in fantasyland and have perfect friends & live forever. they offer one heck of a sales package at the door.

    oh, just to have some fairydust!

    LV101

  • Reopened Mind
    Reopened Mind

    Thank you for your kind responses.

    Journey-on: Yes, I did join back in June. I wrote the essay in April or May to post here. It has taken me a long time to muster up the courage to post it. I have been a long time lurker here. I see you joined in Feb 2007. That is about when I discovered JWD/JWN.

    LV101: I was very gullible! I think being a JW all these years has made me even more gullible. But I am reopening my mind, my eyes, and my heart.

  • GrandmaJones
    GrandmaJones

    Exactly how I feel. How could I have been so gullible? About everything else in life, I do research. I never take anyone's word for anything, and I take the time to look things up for myself. How could I have been so gullible?

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Welcome to the forum. I'm happy your family is finding its way out.

    Cheers

    Chris

  • moshe
    moshe

    welcome- I hope you can balance your family needs with the need to become honest people.

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