My first time

not bitter

I am new to this site. I've been out of it for about 17 years. I've never really looked back or felt nger about any of it. In fact, I've looked back quite fondly at times. But I've got on with my life and have a career that I love, which is fortunate being as I have no formal qualifications. But since visiting this site a few days ago and reading some of the postings, I am full of anger and hurt. This is not because of what I have missed out on or was subjected to but I'm mad that my parents are still in it and going strong. I wish they could see it for what it is. At the same time, I wouldn't want their dreams shattered. They are both reaching 70 and believe in it whole heartedly. All their friends are in it and they have a good social life. Why point these things out to them now.

Whilst on this site I have laughed my head off and also felt a tad teary. I have so much I want to say but don't know where to start. This will do for now.

Does anyone else feel like me about having close family in it but not wanting to rock the boat?

cantleave

Welcome. Many of us are here because of family still inside the cult.

wobble

Welcome Not bitter !

I too am not bitter, well I drink pints of the stuff, so as in "you are what you eat" I suppose I must be part bitter, the rest red wine.

I too, have elderly relatives still in and oh so active, including my dear old Mum, 91 years old in January 2011.

I decided not to rock the boat of these older ones who could not face what would happen if they woke up, i.e losing all their "friends" and other relatives still in.

But I will openly talk to the younger relatives when I get the chance, they can rebuild their lives if they leave, and have a much better life for it.

Welcome again.

yknot

I hear you soooooo loud and clear!

I feel that everytime I walk into the KH!

At what age do we let them be? Should I tell sister 92 who is grieving herself sick about not going out in FS as much as she used too or do I offer other encouragement to lessen her feelings of unworthiness and guilt!

Maybe I should tell the 72 and 75yr old couple since I know their youngest daughter is probably going to exit in the next year so that they can discern why and be a support to her and their granddaughter. They are in excellent health and I expect them to live another 20 years so maybe living that without the shunning would improve the quality all round.......except that they have so much invested as who they are in being a JW. (granted they are a great couple and would make friends easily)

Do I tell the KH's 'Uncle' (ie having no kids of his own) that while I appreciate his trying to keep us all on the straight and narrow that he does more harm then good based on the false premises of the WTS.

And then there is the fear that if we push or expose them too much too soon or too hard that they may become suicidal.

I look forward to the others comments and I thank you immensely for bring the subject up..... I didn't realize it was weighing so heavily on my heart.

__________

Are your parents emotionally capable of handling the 'truth about the truth', are they in good health and of course are they really all that believing or are they 'conscious class' but unaware of their class membership?

Huggles

mouthy

Welcome Not Bitter !!!! So glad that the site gave you a few chuckles,the tears mean you wont
pee as much (my Dad used to tell me that ) I am Granny on board.I am 83. http://exjw.weebly.com/
Is my story .If your folks are happy & have a good social life ,I would just let them stay in bondage,it will only
mean you will lose them if you point out the discrepancies ,You see MY belief (MINE REMEMBER) I think my GOD
examines hearts. Yes I do all I can to help Jehovah's Witnesses come free,but since their minds have been cuffed
we usually have to wait till they feel the cuffs become to tight.
Remember now it is only MY opinion.I was an atheist for over twenty years, I was a JW for 25 yrs,I am now a
follower of the Man,I believe taught truth,who I now believe to be LORD,SAVIOUR,GOD JESUS CHRIST!
But GREAT to have you aboard Please keep posting

Mouthy

DanaBug

Yes, I've come to the conclusion that my parents will probably never wake up and that's for the best. They've built their whole lives inside the org, they'd have to start all over if they left. But I have hope for my youngest brother. He'll be 17 soon and I think he's going thru a lot of the same issues I had at that age, which led me to getting df'd. I'll just be here for him, unconditionally. And when he's ready to know the truth about the "truth" I'll show him what I know.

One thing that's helped me find some peace with this situation, I realized that while my parents are required to shun me, I'm not. I'm free to express my love for them and I will continue to do so. How they respond to that is up to them. No man or organization can dictate to me who I love or how I can express that.

ETA: Welcome to the forum, notbitter!

ProdigalSon

Welcome not bitter!

If they treat you like a human being and you get along with them, it makes sense not to rock their boat. At their age, they're not going to hurt themselves or anyone else. It's not like they're going to miss out on a college education or have all this unfulfilled potential.

None of life's experiences are wasted, it all goes into the great database of our spiritual evolution.

~PS

Heaven

Not Bitter, welcome!

Does anyone else feel like me about having close family in it but not wanting to rock the boat?

Yes, I have the same feelings. It was my parents who rocked the boat by trying to push it on us years ago. My Mom is gone now (so much for the new system being here 'soon'). Any time my Dad brings it up I have my rebuttals but I don't go starting anything with him.

He is experiencing cognitive impairment now as he is aging and may possibly have had a minor stroke. He is having a lot of difficulties with what the WTS demands of its members vs what he is now capable of doing.

This is a sad reality for anyone growing old in this performance based religion/cult.

not bitter

I was worried no one would be interested or reply. Thank you so much.

My folks have been in it for about 37 years and probably the last 10 years have become stronger and more involved. Although they still have a lot to do with the worldly family and are quite accepting of their lifestyles. Though they were extremely judgmental of me when I started to fall away. My mum stopped talking to me virtually and when she did was very rude and dismissive of me. Anyway, thats in the past and we get on very well now.

I've never joined any kind of forum before so this is all quite new to me. I look forward to chatting more to like minded folk

not bitter

I've been reading stuff on here for 3 solid days as I don't have much work on. All the terminology is coming back to me now and its so funny to hear now on the outside. I'd forgotten so much of it. None of my friends apart from 2 I think and my husbands family, know my history or background so I don't talk about it. So its great to finally be able to do it now. Why have I never been here before???

My first time

Share this