I was active back then and terrorized by Armageddon. My basic temperament is introspective. I never felt worthy enough. Somehow just being human seemed to disqualify me. I hated meetings and Witnesess. My school friends were adored. No one I loved would survive Armageddon The illustrations were horrid for children. I spent years flinching. In fact, one day strange weather conditions materialized. My family had disassociated for years. The weather was so freaky I thought Armageddon. A sibling said it outloud. We braced to die and die horribly. Once the weather cleared, we laughed. To this day, I fear it because one never knows. Strange things do happen.
My father was a Bethelite when it was very small. He knew Freddie Franz. Freddie Franz was respected for his intellect and knowledge. When I was a pre-teen, newly a woman, we attended a convention at Yankee Stadium. Freddie Franz gave the main talk that was doctrinal. I am a lawyer and strive for precision. 1975 was very express. We were told to keep it a secret outside the society. He went through intricate computations. It was hard to follow all the permutations of the numbers. He came to a crucial distinction. His calculations were changed by his computation of Eve's menstrual cycle. According to Freddie, she did not menstruate pre-Eden expulsion. The culture was very different then. I was so embarassed at the mention of menstruation, a feeling that women were dirty, and my personal knowledge at 12 that Eve's menstrual cycle is not in the Bible. I started to slink down in my seat. My hope was that we did not have to discuss this locally or at home.
I recall that Ray Franz documented all the Armageddon hoaxes. During Russell's time, a miscalculation occurred despite the power of the Holy Spirit. A new date was assigned. A brother calculated the distance from Pittsburgh to NY. A crucial piece was the rr timetable. This brother investigated and found that the choo-choo trains followed a spur so there was a mistake in the timetable. I howled. Growing up in the area, there was nothing sacred or magical about Pittsburgh and NY and definitely not a choo-choo train in NJ, ending in Hoboken or Secauscus.
Does anyone else fear Armageddon despite nonbelief? Of course, the 1950s were tinged with fears of a nuclear holocaust. The more I realize the governing body knows these dates the more I wonder if they truly believe. Some might. Denial is a powerful force.
