It is your bitterness/hatred towards it that is killing you, and will eventually kill you off.
If bitterness and resentment could kill, then the bitter and resentful JWS would be dying like flies...oh, come to think of it, some of them are. Oops.
Besides, clearly identifying boundaries after years of being on the receiving end of toxic JW bitterness causes some of us to be perfectly clear about "No Go" areas. When traumatized people make a stand against perpetrators, it can either be perceived as "bitterness and resentment" (a special form of victim-bashing) or seen for what it actually is: Triumphantly taking responsibility for one's life, and ending the victim-status by firmly declaring "No".