Get 'deleted' or resign as a ministerial servant?

by trevorbv 20 Replies latest jw friends

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  trevorbv

  Hi everybody,

  I'm a ministerial servant for some years now, but reached to the conclusion that I must get out of JWs as soon as possible. I can no longer waste my time in field service, at the KH or doing menial jobs for the congregation. For some months now my field report is with one digit at the hours section and with empty spaces in magazines, brochures and the others. The actual hours I'm reporting are those in which I try to reason with my JWs friends and point them 'interesting' things I have found out doing 'research' or scientific facts that don't go well with our known pseudo-science proofs of creationism .

  I thought of quiting JWs for good but for my friends and family I decided I will better fade out. This was a brilliant post, by the way. I started to became a low profile member by no longer giving answers at the meetings, skipping meetings and quiting field service.

  Anyway now I'm thinking of quiting as a ministerial servant, but I don't know what would be better: to go to the elders with a resignation letter and tell them that I can no longer be a MS or continue the non-involving strategy and eventually get deleted.

  I myself think the first way is better since is eases the pressure of being watched, questioned and 'encouraged'? Of course that the resignation must be performed with great care and it should not give away my real reasons. What do you think? Was any of you in a similar position?

  Thanks.
• 

  nugget

  I would resign, if you state that you reasons are that you feel that you cannot be the example you would wish to be to the flock you feel it would be best to step down it may smooth things over. If you can throw in issues at work or health issues that are causing concern that also adds weight to the non culpable resignation.
• 

  cantleave

  Resign with dignity.
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  leavingwt

  Welcome!

  If your goal is to FADE, then you wan to avoid bringing any attention upon yourself. Writing a letter will bring MUCH attention.

  So long as you don't have a Suicide Card in your wallet (and you don't fear Hell), there is little urgency to the matter.

  Please read Steve Hassan's first book, if you have not done so.

  Best wishes.
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  Hairyhegoat

  OMG another one! Welcome I would just try to fade at first but if they are onto you then you may need to try another tactic. I was never a ms/elder in all my 43 years in the cult. Me and my family moved house twice in 2 years to different parts of the UK and went to only a couple of meetings before we moved on again. Well the elders have found us again just last week!. We are looking at 2 houses tomoz with a view to getting them off our sent again. Anyway thanks for your post and I look forward to more juicy bits from you

  HHG in the UK
• 

  Think About It

  Trevorbv.......welcome to the forum. Glad you joined. I agree.....resign with dignity. After you resign, do not be surprised how quick you leave for good.

  Think About It
• 

  mythreesons

  I resigned! Then six months later was our last meeting. It's been a year since then. IMHO fading sux! Just FYI from my perspective. But sometimes that time is what you need to figure out that without the "org" you'll be just fine. But, be prepared for the gossip and them calling you out, then turning it around on you and saying it's all YOUR fault. Because.."really, who left who?" That's what the elders told us. Isn't that just a load of BS!

  Just sayin...
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  I thought of quiting JWs for good but for my friends and family I decided I will better fade out.

  It depends on your situation. I resigned as an elder and decided to be a bit vocal about "doubting" the doctrine because I was in so deep.
  If you are already missing so much activity, you might consider avoiding the written letter. I know they hung onto mine and would relish using it on a JC if they ever want to get rid of me officially. They'll say "You admitted doubts, how do you feel now?"

  Anyway, you can resign by asking them to remove you. You can just say how you feel you are being a bad example of field service and meeting attendance. If they just want you to improve, you can say you cannot promise that, so you think it's best if you just resign as an M.S.. Only if they insist on something in writing do you give them something simple like, "Due to circumtances, I don't feel that I am able to serve as an M.S.."
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  mamalove

  Thanks for bringing out that link. I wish you the best. Seems like there are alot of Brits on this board!
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  Hoffnung

  You will make your life easier if you make it look like you have given in to something like materialism. Quit Field service altogether, start to miss meetings. Make the pushing elders clear you are too busy working/studying. Give a no-show for assigned parts or call in one day i advance to cancel. If you quit Field service, your deletion will quickly follow. You could also consider moving congo and decline any offers for reappointment and be low on meeting attendance. If you want to avoid DF, be careful with whom you speak about your doubts and how you formulate it. People get DFed for this. Anyway, welcome here, cool you have woken up.