Being raised a JW sure did give us some odd memories did it not?

by sabastious 12 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  sabastious

  I remember a few times when my mother would speak of "Grandma weeping herself to sleep every memorial night." This was because her husband was of the "Heavenly Hope." She knew that she was to be without her soulmate for eternity in the New World. Of course there is a lot of Witness speculation on this percieved needless sacrifice, but it didn't seem to make my Grandma feel any better.

  Maybe she did eventually accept it, but from a child's perspective it was quite emotional for me to know that every Memorial night she would have to deal with this fear of being alone forever.

  Crazy stuff to have to grow up thinking about, no?

  -Sab
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  DanaBug

  They split up families for eternity.
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  Satanus

  For me, it seems like a war that i lived in. Now that it's over, life seems strangely quiet.

  S
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  sabastious

  They split up families for eternity.

  It's interesting that they admit to this moral dilema and make attempts to explain it.

  The most common one being that "Jehovah will erase your memory of that life."

  Yet that makes me think of Jehovah as a very cold businessman. "I must take your soulmate because he is needed, but don't worry I will erase your memory of him so you wont feel the pain."

  -Sab
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  sabastious

  For me, it seems like a war that i lived in. Now that it's over, life seems strangely quiet.

  For me it's almost too loud. The opportunities for personal growth out here is sometimes overwhelming for me.

  -Sab
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  Satanus

  Yes, i can see that, too. There are a LOT of opportunities. Someone used to tell me, 'one thing at a time'. Listen for your own, inner voice in an on going basis. Don't let others' voices deflect you.

  S
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  DanaBug

  Personally, I'd much rather have the memories. At least it's something of that person. A friend of mine is going through this, her mom started partaking last year.

  I remember my mom's reaction when my df'd aunt sent her a certified letter with pictures of her kids in it. She was so upset, she called my dad to meet her at the post office. It was so strange to me, why she would react like that. She was pissed off she had to sign for it because my aunt would know she got it. It was like my aunt did something wrong, all she did was write to let her know how she and the kids were doing. Weird.
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  BluesBrother

  Sad story sabastious, my memories are not so profound but when you think back it did indeed give us some strange ideas to grow up with.

  When I was a young boy I fully accepted that I would go to prison when I was eighteen. Britain had National Service at the time and the young men all refused . Imprisonment and a record was a right of passage for young male J W's

  I accepted also that my father was going to die "soon" at Armageddon because he was not a Witness. I was quite calm about that, it was just a fact that I lived with every day - that we were going to live forever in Paradise but Dad would be dead unless he changed his religion. Now I wonder, why did that not upset me and cause me to urge him to come to K H? Perhaps I was too preoccupied with looking forward to having a pet lion in the New World..

  Of course you knew that all your schoolmates and teachers were going to die a horrible death "soon" as well. That is why you did not become too friendly (just enough to sociable, no more) But we were going to be all right. Jehovah would protect us provided we kept up our worship. Armageddon and what it would be like, and how we would survive it, were major things to think about, plus of course the expected persecution that we would face before it. When the Government was expected to turn on us and throw us in prison - How strong would we prove to be ?

  All in all , it is a wonder that I grew up to be laid back person that I am today !
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  TotallyADD

  Yes it did to many bad memories. Beside the abuse from many one that stands out right now for me is how children had to act like adults and do things that only adults should have been doing. Example a. going door to door at 6 years of age by your self. b. going to school and uphold the JW belief again with no support while the adults get to stay home. c. Being very alone as a child with no friends. d. Being a victim of child abuse by the P.O. because they were to be trusted. Yes very odd memories indeed.
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  Band on the Run

  My childhood memories are so painful I can't detail them here and then go on functioning in my present life. When an adult choose a path, they have considered it. Horrible things were chosen for me. I had no say.

  I go around showing almost anyone my Christmas tree photos. It seems bizarre that I could marry, have an education, not be tortured, not die during Armageddon. Anything I love doing has a strangeness around it after all these years.

  My younger sister thinks I am daft. She was 8 when we left. I was 16. There is a long span of years in that calculation. Whever I am happy, I fear it will be seized from me.

  I still mourn my childhood. My rage towards the WTS is outsized. I fought for baby sister when I was still a teen. My family was associated since Russell so I knew lots of juicy gossip existed along with the Witness rules. Loyalty to my family meant absolute loyalty to Jehovah.