by jookbeard 42 Replies latest jw experiences
Sorry to hear about your mum, it must really hurt.
Make sure that they do not stop you going to her funeral, it is part of the grieving process, don't worry about anybody else's feelings, you need to do this for yourself.
Do you have anyone close to you that can support you when you go?
Take care
Freesoul xx
Oh wow!
Heartfelt love to you mate!
Jookbeard
I don't believe the elders would know what your mum's wishes were, as they are only there to protect their religion. If they really cared about your family and your mum's wishes they would not be breaking families up. I don't won't to tell you what to do, but there is nothing wrong with a DF'd person attending a JW funeral.
I am not Df'd but have faded but when my sister in law passed away about a year ago, there were a lot of people that were DF'ed that attended her funeral, they were not sure if they should go but felt better after they did, they did this because they wanted to pay their respect to her has a beautiful human being.
Take care in whatever decision you make xx
jookbeard - this is easier for me to say than for you to do, but reading your last post this is my take. Bear in mind I do not know your situation and so I am shooting from the hip.
Don't go to her funeral. She didn't want you there. That is abnormal for any close relative to state. She sounds as if she was a most twisted individual. Maybe she did her own twisting or she built upon others twisting of her.I don't know.
It seems that her life was all about her. I've found some (not all) witnesses joined for what they could get. They obviously felt they deserved better than the rest of humanity. They deserved everlasting life; they deserved their parents being resurrected, in short they felt entitled. As the years slip by they get disappointed, depressed, negative, bitter and twisted.
She allied herself either tacitly or openly, I do not know which - with your abusive father - and she hated having been exposed - for her inaction or support of his behaviour - along with him.
If there is anyone who might be puzzled by your not attending that you care about you could send them a note saying that you would have gone to your mother's funeral as any normal loving human being would. But explain that (name the individual) told you that your mother did not want you there. Tell them you have no reason to doubt that individual's word and so have chosen to stay away.
HTH
Shunning is so far out of the pale of normal human behavior that there really can be no objectively right or wrong way to deal with the situation.
Just listen to your own heart and feelings on the matter and do what you think is best, to the best of your ability.
The family will likely criticise you whatever you decide to do, so I wouldn't really consider their opinions AT ALL on the subject.
Your mother. Your grief. Your choice.
