Thanks for your comments guys, it was a good thing that I didn't marry him and saw him as he was before then, especially the 'pay back' I recieved but in all fairness it left him a little burnt so maybe he treats his wife with more gentleness.
#123#123 He didn't actually say sorry for shunning, we didn't discuss that but said a few things to express his sadness and openly welcomed me back home. He also discussed spiritual matters with me, one of them being about the Holy Spirit and showed me how I could look it up on the WTBTS CD Rom. My understanding is that if a family member is involved in a family situation they certainly should not be discussing spiritual things. He said that we had lost so many years and at least it was something to be reunited. I wrote a letter to him expressing my feelings when I had returned home. He called me straight away and was weeping, he said he thought I would have hated him so I was able to explain why this couldn't be the case, he told me he loved me dearly too. There were a few things he later shared with me at his bedside, he said I was a good person and it was so sad what had happend. He prepared a letter for each of us kids and included in mine was a comment about sinning against the holy spirit. He said that I had not done this and quoted a fairly recent Watchtower (I really don't know why he said this but it makes me think that at one time he believed I had and this was probably 'new light' on the matter).
One thing I found interesting was that he had always included me equally in his will along with all my brothers and sisters. I know it is only money but the org has never made any 'rules' about it so it was something to see what his own conscience had decided and that would have been to ensure he did what he could do to meet family responsibilities. I mention this because others have made comments that it is not always the case.
There was such games being played with my JW sisters and it was an interesting experience but also left me hurt. They made it clear to me that dad only accepted me back because there had been this 'family necessity' due to him being ill and he wouldn't have done it otherwise.
Flipper thanks for your words of comfort. The emotional trauma things like this can cause is horrendous and for me it lasted many, many years. They are really just 'toying' with many of us. They lack any physcological skills and this leads them to make their own rules which results in serious problems. These rules are outside of biblical backing. For instance, who said a df'd person must wait six months or so to be re-instated? The fruits that they bear from things like this don't affect them, they affect the individual and their family so they remain oblivious to it. How can they actually demonstrate that they are being guided by the Holy Spirit in these matters?
Like others have said - I wish there had been a place like this to come to to help see things in perspective. I was so young and was still learning to 'mature'. I accept that these men are imperfect but there is one main thing that I am angry about.
It is the idea that only a JW can ever have a close relationship with God and Jesus, so when someone leaves they are usually of the mindset that they are automatically cut off. If they valued a persons connection with God then they would be instructing members to try to maintain this rather than promoting themselves as being the 'missing link' that must be obeyed and followed. Rather they should be guiding followers. I also believe that if they were keeping on the watch and preparing for Armageddon then this is how they would prepare their followers and not for them to rely on their headship. Besides if their interpretation of the F&DS is correct they do not know how long this appointment is for and it may end before or during Armageddon and then what have they achieved? There will be a bunch of people that will feel they have no guidance.
Mattew 24: 42 “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. 43 But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. 44 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.
45 “Who then is the faithful and wise servant, whom the master has put in charge of the servants in his household to give them their food at the proper time? 46 It will be good for that servant whose master finds him doing so when he returns.
According to them Jesus has already returned and appointed them, but the scripture says he will return again, so when will that third return occur?
