MY DAD IS SHUNNING ME!

by Hairyhegoat 17 Replies latest jw friends

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  Hairyhegoat

  Well this was no surprise to me that my dad was doing this. M df brother went round last night to borrow some tools and my dad just had to mention that he was dissapointed with the family and how we don't go to the meetings anymore. He told my brother that he could not have a proper farther son relationship as he does not share the same faith and hope for the future as him, and if an emergencey situation was to present it'self then he would be their for him. He also spoke about me and that I was an apostate who's kids would die at armpitagdeon.

  Nothing to build us up as a family! all doom and death and nations to turn on religion soon so you had better get back to the borg. My brother was giving as good as he got with my dad. All the time though my dad was running to another room to avoid my brothers questions. Well my brother said the questions I want answers for are just the same as people on the doors ask so what's the problem with me asking them. Brother said you can't take it from anyone who questions your faith can you. My dad has been in over 50 years and it may be hard for him to face the fact that it was all a lie. I have 4 kids and very little family alive and the ones who are piss me off by no contact in over 3 years just cuz we don't go meetings. My kids say what's happened to grandad he doesn't come to see us anymore.

  What should I tell them? I hate the WT

  HHG
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  flipper

  HAIRYHEGOAT- I 'm not aware of your status or can't remember- are you just fading or are you DFEd ? If you are just fading your dad should have no problem with associating with you and seeing his grandchildren. Hell- Even IF you are DFed he should still see his grandchildren. I would try reasoning with your dad and say it's unloving to punish his grandchildren just because he has differences with you over your doubts about the Witnesses.

  First I'd try really hard reasoning with your dad- then if he remains hardheaded - just explain to your kids that grandpa is in a " mind control cult " and he doesn't reason on Christianity the way Jesus taught. Be honest with your kids and tell them grandpa is TOLD what to do by a organization that won't let him use his own mind. The more upfront and honest you are with your kids- they will get the REAL picture and then the enemy won't be so much grandpa for not seeing them- but the WT society for making grandpa THINK he can't see them. If that makes any kind of sense. Your kids will respect you for being upfront with them. Just my 2 cents
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  tia.dalma

  My dad is shunning me, too!

  This happens since I became a JW.

  I hate the world!
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  White Dove

  Shunning is unloving, no matter the spiritual path you walk. Jesus would slap both your father's faces right off their heads for treating you that way.
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  jwfacts

  Well my brother said the questions I want answers for are just the same as people on the doors ask so what's the problem with me asking them.

  Great comment.
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  tiki

  It is so sad that people treat family like enemies - heinous criminals - for no reason at all except a different viewpoint on the grand scheme of things. I know, I come from generations of dysfunctional family members due to religion. It is so pointless. We are all people, on the same earh, subject to the same pluses and minuses.....who really has any right to judge any other person....and think they are unfit for their holy or not so holy presence. We are all in the same boat. If you don't like someone, fine.....just limit your time with them...don't let them drive you nuts. But just obliterating innocent people from your life because they think differently is just stupid, cruel and ridiculous.
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  moshe

  I know I wouldn't accept this treatment - come father's day, I would write a letter to the local newspaper- a first person, I love you dad, but due to your JW shunning, You won't let me tell you this in person, etc, etc. If everyone did this, the bad PR would so poison the public public towards the JWs that they couldn't accomplish anything in preaching work. The public shame would eventually become too great for even JWs to tolerate. JWs try to pretend like the shunning of family members is an isolated event done by a few individuals-- and a personal decison- one not organized by the JW community. Their lies need to be exposed.
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  satinka

  HHG,

  I understand what shunning feels like. My two grown kids shun me because I'm df'd. They can't wrap their head around it that I don't want to be a JW anymore.

  It still hurts, though. The JW religion tears families apart.

  Can you feel the love?

  satinka
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  Band on the Run

  Shunning grandchildren and hoping they will die at Armageddon for your shortcomings is sick. It must hurt like hell. Living with conditional love is rough. My brother was in a cult -not JW. It helped me to realize that my brother lost his mind. He was no longer himself. The cult had control. Over decades, he managed to leave.

  Did Jesus teach this? He taught about love, about the shepherd searching for the lost sheep, go and sin no more - but he healed the person despite the status, respect for familial relationships.

  Jesus' examples shone through to me even as a child. The WTBTS on one side and Jesus on the other. Ii choose to worship Jesus. Witnesses don't quite believe in Jesus. Judaism taught the same values. Jesus wasn't that much of a revolutionary. Every major religion teaches these pieties. Hopefully, something will trigger your father to re-evaluate his beliefs. We waited decades for my brother.

  The sad part is there is nothing to do. People who think JWs are good citizens show know this side of the story.
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  aquagirl

  Moshe,that would work with normal people,but the dubs would just see it as more persecution and as a sign that they were doing what their god wanted.Ive seen it first hand,they turn any criticism into an assault from Satan. Hairy hegoat,I hate them too...I really do.I lost many years of my dads company because of the dogma they instilled into his head.Him being an elder made him have to be "an example".Then,when he got older and really needed some help,he saw that the only one he could count on was me,the bad association.I believe that it gave him something to think aboutmthat wasnt on the dub's agenda..fockers...