How have your opinions changed?

by LovelyEunie 13 Replies latest jw experiences

  • LovelyEunie
    LovelyEunie

    How have your opinions changed on subjects like premarital sex, gay marriage, higher education, music, smoking, interfaith marriage etc... and do you think they have changed for the better? Personally I feel like everybody has the right to choose their own path, free to make their own choices outside of the JW's and everybody within their religion needs to deal with it and move on, like they expect everyone else to do when they made the choice to become a JW.

    I have no problem with homosexuality, seeing that I'm bisexual myself; I used to hate it when my mother would get angry with me because I wouldn't tell my gay friends that it was wrong and disgusting and one day God was gonna killl them kill them for it, when she knew I was too, it was hypocracy at it's finest. Smoking is so not a moral choice to me, it's a health choice. Big difference. Interfaith marriages, well, if you meet and fall in love with someone on the outside you shouldn't be ostrasized for it. Youy should be able to choose whoever you love from where ever, not fight over the one brother in the KH and hope he picks you (seen it done many times because of that stupid 'marry only in the lord rule' ).

  • Morbidzbaby
    Morbidzbaby

    As a JW, deep down, I always had issues with a lot of their rulings on what was moral or immoral. I toed the party line because it was expected, but I know now how delusional I was to think I could keep my doubts on the back burner forever.

    I am very pro gay rights. It's now my opinion that a person's sexuality doesn't determine their worth as a human being and should not determine whether or not they are entitled to the same rights as someone who is heterosexual. I've known many lovely gay couples who seem to have more respect for their relationship than a lot of hetero couples do. I believe they should be given the right to marry the person they love, just as heteros are. Quite often I hear the argument that "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve"... While I don't believe such a creator exists, IF he or she did, then they also created animals with homosexual tendencies and the need to parent offspring with a same sex mate. So that argument is blown out of the water, in my opinion. Funny you should mention your mother's attitude...mine had the same. When they legalized same-sex unions here, she cried about how they were "ruining the institution of marriage that Jehovah created"...oh, so Brittney Spears and the myriad of other hetero celebs had no affect on that? Gimme a break. My parents are always zeroing in on this one gay friend of mine and making snide comments, complete with lisps and effeminate hand gestures. "Oh, we saw ____ today...yeah he was out with his new beau..." and then my mom will chime in with "Ugh! That's so disgusting!". My mother would never say these things to his face. EVER! She waits until his back is turned. One day he came over and put his hand on her shoulder and very lovingly asked how she was doing (cause that's how he is). She said "I'm fine" with a smile...then when he walked away, she shuddered and mumbled "Don't touch me, you disgusting PIG!". Nice. Very Christian.

    As for premarital sex, I am now of the "try before you buy" mentality. I would never buy a car without test driving it. I did the whole waiting for marriage thing and sex was a HUGE problem in my relationship. It was the elephant in the room that no one wanted to talk about. We were highly incompatible in that area and I'll not make that mistake again.

    Smoking, I agree, is a health issue. I don't care if someone wants to pollute their own body, but I appreciate the ability to opt out if I so choose...and not just opt out because I HAVE to because some crazy cult tells me I have to. I will smoke hookah once in awhile, and I have smoked marijuana on occasion (though not anymore). It's my body, it's my choice.

    As for anything else, although I am not Wiccan, I think the Wiccan Rede sums up how I feel quite nicely: An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    I was never a judgmental person but defended the watchtower anti-gay perspective out of blind loyalty to what I thought was god.

    I have since shrugged off the 'company man' BS and reverted to good ol' me.

    Unky Punky does not judge! Oddly enough I see the sneering judging attitude in Mrs Punk (R&F JDub), now more than ever.

  • LovelyEunie
    LovelyEunie

    @MorbidzBaby: My mom would do the same thing to me when ever I brought up my best friend wanting to be with anther guy. She would make this disgusted face and be like "You need to tell your friend to stop chasing after men and find a girl, its just perverted!" Gee mom, like someone could change how their brain is wired at the drop of a dime... We probably have the same mother lol jk jk

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    Smoking is bad. But it is addictive. Should it be disfellowhipping? I don't know.

    Gay marriage. I really think that the Bible does not approve of homosexuality. Yet, we have gay friends, and I think I understand the issue better than most do. I don't know that is it "right: From a political view, I think all states should allow "civil unions". "MARRIAGE" is a religious matter, and should really be kept separate from the State approved legal status. Let the States regconize marriages as "legal unions" but let them regconize "gay unions" too. If a church chooses to approve "gay marriages" fine. Officially any marriage is just a "Legal Union". Get the State out of the issue. Marriage is a Church issue. Legal Unions are a State issue. Polls show that most Americans would approve of such.

  • nolongerwaiting
    nolongerwaiting

    I can't relate to my old JW self now. Basically, most of what JW's got their panties in a bunch over I don't care about any more.

    NLW's wife

  • Morbidzbaby
    Morbidzbaby

    @MorbidzBaby: My mom would do the same thing to me when ever I brought up my best friend wanting to be with anther guy. She would make this disgusted face and be like "You need to tell your friend to stop chasing after men and find a girl, its just perverted!" Gee mom, like someone could change how their brain is wired at the drop of a dime...

    It's incredible, isn't it? I just can't understand how someone can be so judgemental of others, yet say "It's not our place to judge, it's Jehovah's". They really DON'T see just how much they judge others. To them, they're "upholding Jehovah's sovereignty", but the thing is, if he did exist and did create everything, why would he need puny humans to do that for him? I once had someone compare being born gay to being born with a deformity . "They can't help it, it's imperfection...but it's still wrong and they shouldn't act on it". So a person is supposed to be single, lonely, and unhappy for the rest of their life just because god supposedly disapproves of how they were born?? The whole thing boggles my mind AND pisses me off at the same time lol.

    And yeah...maybe we don't have the same mother, but DAMN I think they'd get along just dandy!! lol

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    I don't have time to get specific on each issue but I can say I'm more liberal than I was as a JW and far less judgmental of others.

  • Lunatic Faith
    Lunatic Faith

    One of my best friends, who I went to pioneer school with, is gay. So I have been pro gay rights even while still an active witness, I just kept that to myself.

    Once I decided I was leaving the JW's, the first thing I did was go out and buy a cigar. I had always been curious about smoking. In fact, ever since I was a child I would dream at least once a year that I was a smoker. Now I wonder if the dreams will cease. I want to live a full life though so I don't smoke regularly. I was visiting some ex-JW friends in Vegas last month and tried hooka for the first time. I think I might get me one of those.

    Before truly accepting that I was out of the organization, I was visiting an ex-JW (fader) who offered me 'special brownies', so I tried them. Now I am a fairly regular user of MJ--whenever I can get it.

    I am now watching all the movies I was never allowed to watch under the JW creed. Mostly horror and paranormal stuff.

    So I guess I now have a no-holds-barred attitude. Before I tried to remain unspotted and perfect in my choices but now I am trying everything and ready to listen to anything. My opinions are still evolving but like madsweeney I am entirely unjudgmental.

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    premarital sex : I believe that all species are driven to mate, and that marriage is a construct of man designed like most constructs of man, to control, legislate morality. If I were single, I might choose to have premarital sex. I might not. I think there are both pragmatic and personal issues to consider in both choices.

    gay marriage: Why not? Given my opinion that marriage is man constructed.

    higher education: Beneficial for most people.

    music: Personal preferences hold here.

    smoking: I oppose smoking for myself. For others, their choice. I don't think it healthy.

    interfaith marriage: Should a mammal of the same species choose not to mate with a mammal of a different tint? I don't see why not.

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