The Most Important Witness Meeting Is...

by metatron 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • metatron
    metatron

    The Theocratic Ministry School..... well, let's see ... it's conducted by an elder who's stuck with the job and often doesn't want it. The quality of the meeting keeps sinking over time as Witlesses can't read well or explain more than a couple proof texts. The "Ministry" doesn't generate converts by itself, anyway....

    The Book Study? Nope, this is just a time waster based on ever more vacuous books printed by the Society. Where's Fred Franz when you need him?

    Public Talk, Nope, this waste of time has gone from One Hour to 45 minutes to a half an hour, revealing its empty throw-away character....... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz My God! Don't let me doze off because I snore!

    The Most Important Meeting? Yes, you guessed it! It's the Watchtower Study! Why else would you have idiot Witlesses go over entire paragraphs with yellow magic markers as if something "deep" and important was being said? This is where Witlesses learn to be "cheerleaders" for the "truth" AND NEVER ADMIT ANY WRONG in the organization. Take these nonsensical beliefs and put them in the mouths of ordinary publishers and you got them hooked!

    It's the key to cult maintenance. Kiddies, remember to underline all the "Jehovahs" and "Jesuses" so you can learn the same sort of religious OCD as your parents!

    metatron

  • frigginconfused
    frigginconfused

    For me it was the closing prayer.

  • im stuck in
    im stuck in

    The last one you will ever attend!

  • TimothyT
    TimothyT

    Bible highlights all the way!!!

    Its the only part of the meetings which the bible is used solely!

    :)

  • metatron
    metatron

    Oh, I forgot the Service Meeting...... but then again, it's so utterly forgettable. There's no reason for any Service Meeting to be more than 5 minutes long. You announce what teenager is disfellowshipped this week ( not the elder's kid, some poor single sister's kid since she doesn't matter), you tell people the "offer" ( may depend on what crappy 196 page books are available in the literature room) and to open your wallets to pay for the C.O.'s health care or car (and how are doing, financially?)

    metatron

  • wasblind
    wasblind

    I thought all of the meetings were important, they are so important

    that hours are bein' cut all over the place , pioneer hours, public talks,

    book study at individual homes cut slap out

    ( and that was supposed to be an alternate place to meet when the real persecution start)

    further proof that they don't even believe the crap they put in print themselves

    oh yea can't you just feel the sense of urgency, anyday now, keep on the watch

    oh yea the sky is fallin' too

    Edit: And don't get no education , the WTS need dumbass folk

  • strymeckirules
    strymeckirules

    i learned to be a great public speaker from the old school service meetings. and singer from the songs. and i learned how to sleep 3 ways in a sitting position.

    back when you used to get to write an intro and middle and conclusion to the bible readings. the best was you were a star that night when i was a kid, get to go for mcdonalds ice cream after the meeting.

    just sucks who i have to thank for the skills.

    if you didn't have a talk though, zzzzzzzzzzz......

  • jws
    jws

    ...the ones you miss!

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    I don't see what's so important about the boasting sessions, except that they waste your time so you can't do anything you want to. How many times have I heard these things being about "getting out of the world", and there was nothing of substance to offer. So, what do you do? What do the people you drag in do? I once checked out a MLM that wanted me to sell CD sets for $1500 and seminars for $7,500--that taught people how to sell the exact same CDs and seminars! Nowhere was there anything in them that was of any value.

    So, what are you supposed to do once you are in? Suppose the "warning" work ever did come to an end? People are now awaiting instructions, which may or may not be accurately told to the congregation. You get the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger instructing hounder-hounder-hounders to instruct hounder-hounders to instruct the hounders to instruct the congregation--transcription errors and outright scams are likely to come up anywhere in the link. And, what are the people supposed to do? Sit there and wait? Isn't that what worldly people are supposedly going to be doing, but with totally different results?

    At least in the world, there are plenty of courses of action that are explicit. Some make sense--and some are actually beneficial even if the end never comes. For instance, the Washtowel instructed people in 1969 to pio-sneer and take crap jobs. Suppose, instead, I invested just one measly ounce of silver per month (except during the period when the Hunt brothers created the shortage, but you make up the missed ounces when the price crashed). After 45 years, you would end up with 540 ounces of silver--with little sacrifice and very simple rules. Now, those people that pio-sneered made much bigger sacrifices and had to abide by much stricter rules. And what are they left with? Destitution. And that destitution is whether or not the dollar does become toilet paper. At least the silver would hold its value.

    And, besides instructing people to do things that have zero or negative value, I have seen many a boasting session that wasted 15 minutes discussing getting the most out of the boasting sessions. This is similar to the seminars teaching me to sell other copies of the same seminars! It is a complete ripoff, and you are not going to make, preserve, or save any wealth of any kind based on the information found within them. If you want the kind of "wealth" from the Bible, I recommend reading the Bible and just the Bible, alone or in small groups. Either way, you are going to be better off doing that instead of attending boasting sessions that sell others the same boasting sessions.

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    I was always told 'the Watchtower' which I always found excruciating. It wasn't fun to conduct either. I used to volunteer for car park duty just to escape the tedious nonsense!

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