by ladonna 22 Replies latest jw friends
When is it time to stop being an XJW, or an X anything? When is it time to stop being on XJW forums? When is it time to just live?
Do XJW forums eventually become cults unto themselves?
Do they provide as much negative as they do positive input?
Does the negative eventually outway the positive?
Ana
Manners require time, and nothing is more vulgar than haste.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson
Do XJW forums eventually become cults unto themselves?
anna of cousre. look at us all. :P
Do they provide as much negative as they do positive input?
haahjah. i like this place but i see lots more negative energy here than postitive. and yes, i add to the negative often }:)sorry
Does the negative eventually outway the positive?
depends on what threads yer reading :p.
how come people post all these questions and never tell us their answers/
and that cats freaking me out. i liked it bettwr when it didnt blink.....
I tell old non-JW friends that I am no longer a JW.
I have recently bumped into some old friends (non-JW) and they have all pointed out that they know that it is hard to stay/be a JW.
They looked at me sympathetically, yet knowingly. Funny how people are aware as to how difficult it has been ...don't you think?
I never say goodbye to this forum, as it def. has helped me in so many way's. It has really taken me through pretty much every emotion going. I feel that I have started to grow in life....I needed that.
I don't personally think that JW internet forums will become 'cults' simply due to the nature of the internet.....it's not 'personal'.
I will always be an EX-JW. Coz that's the truth. (but I won't be telling anyone if I can help it
Latte
Some people got a huge issue with their dub history, a history they can never forget and grow beyond. Im one of those people. Its a loss really, and I spend all my time involved with dubdom,thinking about it,reliving it,rereading material. Its all time, hours a day , that could be spent doing other things like pursuing money or partying.
If only you can get over the dub hurdle.
I cant.
If you can, if theres a possibility you can leave it behind, I recommend you do so ASAP.
The longer you stay looking at it, thinking about it, the more ingrained that pattern of reliving it, thinking about it, will become.
You wanna spend your whole life rehashing the past? keep playing it over? Keep talkin about the same old bullshit on this site?
If you can...walk away now. Some can. They are the lucky ones.
rf,
Your comments hit home with me, the longer you dwell over these things the harder it will be to ever pull completely away. The problem is when family are so indoctrinated and still practising witnesses it will always be there to remind you, the longer they continue to ignore you the longer it hurts. I don’t see anyway of forgetting the past and carrying on life with out a thought of the WTS, that’s the way they want it and we all have to accept we are still slaves to the WTS in mind. The way to counter it is in forums such as these and talking to other xjw's. It is a big change in all of our lives when we stop being JW's I wish I could put it out of my mind but I cant, so writing comments and talking about it will help the pain that has been caused by the WTS.
freeborg.
For some of us it seems our lot is to remain in the cycle.
I just started a new job. Working for a disfellowshipped dub. All the guys who work for him are ex dubs and a lot of them Ive known thirty years. The bosses brother comes around to the factory. Hes an upstanding dub... Most of the people I hang out with and go visit are associated with dub world either directly or second hand.
ah, its all good fun.
If it were up to me I would immediately disassociate myself from everything that has anything to do with the Borg.
The reality is different. I have kids that are in this marvelous religion. My x wife is a devoted JW and is trying to create a distance between me and my two youngest kids who live with her.
So if you know what it's like to walk on eggshells you know how my life is. Every word I say has to be carefully thought over, because one wrong word (and it seems that I have said many) sets you back months. I imagine many of you out there can relate to this. Before I knew about this board I was on my own. All my "friends" are gone, I had nobody to converse with. This forum has helped me a lot.
I wish I could step away rightnow, but I can't. I hope one day all my loved-ones can see how the WT has deceived them. Then I will step away. What? Step away? Kick those bastards down until there's nothing left of them, but dust to blow in the wind.
Ana, I was an exjw for 14 yrs before I got onto exjw sites on the net (1996). I believe I'd got on with my life pretty well in that time. The thing that stops one getting truly on with one's life is the constant reminder of their families who won't talk to them. I had a lot of dub crap to deal with during those 14 yrs and I did it without any support from anyone (cept hubby).
I've been quite active over the last few days - but I do tend to come and go a lot. I don't need this place, but I enjoy meeting others who have been thru this stuff. I enjoy the intellectual and spiritual discussions and hearing about people's feelings.
I thought a cult set down rules of who you could spend time with and what your routine should be. I dont find any of that here. This is simply an open discussion with a lot of different points of view. It's a club not a cult. The joining fee is a bit steep, but I've paid it and I want my money back (if only!!!). Failing that I'll hang around when and where I so choose because I do what suits me now and i don't answer to anyone. (cept my bloody kids!!!)
Finally, there are a lot of new people just leaving the Org. Who will comfort them and reasure them that there is life after the Org,? AND finally, finally, it "pleasures me" to know how much we irritate the folk at Brooklyn!!! :-)
marilyn
when are we gonna meet for coffee anywho????
I think the way you personally idenify yourself as a 'JW' and then an 'ex-JW' gradually diminishes over time. I'll always be an ex-JW just as I am an ex-student of my high school or an ex-employee of my former employers.
It doesn't control things anymore though and that is the key (for me anyway)
