The classic features of a JW wedding are:

highdose

Firstly a wedding/sales talk that mostly features heavily on how the woman should behave (hint, doormat) and lightly brushes over the fact of the husbands bevhaviour ( oh yeah he should treat her well)

The reception normaly at some crummy comunity hall with yellowed ceilings and chucks of damp plaster falling off the walls. The seats normaly arranged facing eachother all around the edge, so that theres a huge unused space in the middle and everyone is climbing over everyone elses legs to get to their chair.

A big spread donated by everyone, normaly an ode to food poisoning. An MS proudly guarding the "drinks table" making sure that no one enjoys themselves too much.

All over by 10pm after the B&G drive off in their rusty pioneer car.

Just some "highlights"

Jadeen

Only Kingdom Melodies get played before the ceremony. Heaven forbid that some nice classical or other instumental pieces get played.

BluesBrother

THat just about sums up so many J W weddings that I have been to....At least your example has a "big spread, the last one I attended did not. The only one that I enjoyed was criticized for being "worldly"

highdose

oh yes and no readings or anything in the wedding talk, i think the classic out line is "The woman should be a doormat,...this is how much of a doormat she should be...heres an illistration of what kind of doormat she should be...this scripture here tells us how god will kill the bride if shes not a doormat..........oh yeah and er the groom should try to be nice to her... but only if shes a doormat"

At the reception there will be some thwarted young pioneer would wanted to be a singer and got gulit tripped into pioneering instead. they will sing and either sing well and we get a glimsp of what could have been. Or they be so scared they just whisper they way through it.

All the elders sit around eating samonella vol a vonts saying " aww such a nice sprituality mature couple!" because both of them got baptised aged 13!

Scooby-Doo

Sounds like every little girl's dream...

Never been to one myself, but I've always been told how lovely KH weddings are.

All i know is, on my wedding day, the KH is the last place I'd like to be.

No wonder why so many couples are now performing their ceremonies in nature parks.

NewYork44M

Don't forget the announcement that "there will be no clinking of the glasses."

Mr. Falcon

don't forget a DRY reception with HORRID DJing. "Celebration", "We Are Family" are among the staples. haha reminds me of a few recent ones I've attended. Had to bring a flask and literally drank in the bathroom stall in the men's room.

Few things in life are as humbling as having to drink Wild Turkey from a hidden flask while locked in a stall of the fire hall's bathroom.

MF

jookbeard

secretly getting blind drunk as well.

lesabre

they always had polkas, waltzes, and the chicken dance thrown in at the reception. (in wisconsin anyways) i remember the first wedding i went to where they played a few songs that were ACTUALLY popular at the time and only the young people got up to dance (about 10) and the old people just crabbed about it the entire time. lol. a few weddings later, they got used to it. haha.

Morbidzbaby

I've been to a few that had "nice" receptions... ie. a hall rented from an upscale restaurant or other venue (like a place that actually DOES wedding receptions!) with cloth napkins, appetizers, salad, soup, main, and dessert courses, and an actual dance floor. Good food, I must admit! All plated and served by waiters and waitresses. Amazingly, mostly all of those marriages went kaput. But not all JW wedding receptions are horrid.

Other things I remember:

~No toasting (based on Pagan beliefs...but wait, so are wedding rings!)

~No best man speech (cause that ends with toasting and we don't want TOO much attention on the happy couple on THEIR day)

~Certain ones winking and saying "You know what THEY'RE gonna do tonight!" wink wink nudge nudge

~No dollar dance

~Cheesy music that was previously okayed by an elder or MS, guaranteed to be not much fun.

~Elders keeping an eye out for those that may be "dancing provocatively"

The classic features of a JW wedding are:

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