can somebody shed some light on me?

psychiatric

Hello all!

Ill introduce myself. my name is Darren, im 23 and live in England.

Im having some problems with the "truth".

To start it off and to keep it as minimal as possible because i dont want to bore your minds, i was raised with my whole family as a roman catholic.

after moving around the world, even as far as new zealand, i got myself in a terrible way in Guernsey Channel Islands. I met some old friends of mine who were into all sorts related to the "crime scene" and i got myself involved with drugs and the like.

I began a spiralling into depression and cutting my arms to feel alive. I ended up in intensive care several times overdosing, got hit by a car, lost my family (they moved away and didnt want to know) and so on. It was a horrific life.

I began talking with some elders, and i started going to the meetings and started a bible study.

this all started last july. since then i have been progressing in the truth and it has saved me in many ways, i stopped a lot of my bad life, drugs etc and started doing good, and gaining more knowledge bible related.

its only recently that i feel somehtings and some teachings i seem to disagree with, or i should say, find hard to beileve.

now i feel extremely lost in my mind in this world, because now every time someone says soemthing i have it in my mind its the devil saying these bad things etc, but its not! its my FRIEND! How can it be the devil! i dont know whats happened to my mind. i fdeel as if i have been indoctrined in some way.

there just seems to be this control on everyone in the organization and yes granted it has definetly set me free from my old ways and helped me, but if i disagree with certain things, surely i can air my opinions and not have to be sat down and told otherwise!

and also, the watchtower society, which is supposedly run by Jesus Christ via the faithful and discreet slave :S :S (bare with me on this one) how is this so? is this scriptural? or do i just have to accept this is lead by jesus Christ himself?

Anyone who can help me with anything related to this post will be a great help.

Please note i am not baptized, or even become and unbaptized publisher, though i have started bible readings in the school.

many thanks to all!

Darren.

leavingwt

Welcome!

progressing in the truth

Do you feel that they alone have the truth?

sizemik

Hi and welcome Darren . . .

now i feel extremely lost in my mind in this world, because now every time someone says soemthing i have it in my mind its the devil saying these bad things etc, but its not! its my FRIEND! How can it be the devil! i dont know whats happened to my mind. i fdeel as if i have been indoctrined in some way.

You are being indoctrinated. I was too and stayed that way for 30 years. Trust your instincts on this one.

there just seems to be this control on everyone in the organization and yes granted it has definetly set me free from my old ways and helped me, but if i disagree with certain things, surely i can air my opinions and not have to be sat down and told otherwise!

High control religious organisations ALL behave this way. If you disagree with what you are being taught when you are baptised . . . you will invite trouble . . . if you continue to hold to such opinions and express them you will be disfellowshipped and shunned.

The Bible does have advice, which when followed can improve our lives. This is true of many religions, but is also achieved by non-religious folk too. It does not make one particular religion "the truth"

Others will have something to add I'm sure.

I look forward to hearing more from you.

Murray (New Zealand)

Witness My Fury

Go with your doubts and gut feeling. Yes "the truth" has helped you recover yourself from a poor stuation, but that (and i think you know this) is not reason to feel obligation towards it. Do your research and make up yer mind for yourself.

Lots on here like me wish we could have done that questioning and proper research many many years ago right at the start like you can and saved a wasted life. Unfortunately this is basically denied to any born in like me as we are indocrinated from birth that it is the truth so often just suppress any niggling doubts we have along the way. It's quite tragic now I look back on it. How can a teenager, or many others younger KNOW what they are committing to? Answer is they cant and we didnt.

Heaven

Welcome psychiatric. I am glad to hear you are on a positive path to healing.

the watchtower society, which is supposedly run by Jesus Christ via the faithful and discreet slave :S :S (bare with me on this one) how is this so? is this scriptural? or do i just have to accept this is lead by jesus Christ himself?

No this is not scriptural. The Bible can be used to justify anything. If you wish to remain a Jehovah's Witness, you must accept everything, without question, delivered to you from the Faithful and Discreet Slave.

As you progress with your studying you will find that more and more the Watchtower uses scripture to justify their agenda and continually goes beyond scripture.

For example, as a teen I was told that if I did not go door-to-door handing out Watchtower and Awake! magazines that my eternal salvation was in peril. I asked my Mom to provide the scripture where that specific definition is stated. She was unable to do so.

The Watchtower wishes to define for you the meaning of 'works'. If you let them do this on your behalf, you will never be happy. This will, in turn, create ill health for you. All things flow from happiness and the lack of it. Follow Christ's wisdom here -- love yourself, love others, and help those less fortunate than yourself. We all have different ways of doing this and it is not difficult. My ways certainly do not include The Watchtower publishing corporation's definitions(s).

Satanus

Groups, whether they be high control religious groups like the wt, or even street gangs or motorcycle clubs can seem to help a person who was lost/didn't know where they were going, or in trouble. It doesn't mean that they are the best way to do things, and that a person should stay w them, despite their flaws. 'Course, once a person joins any of the above, they make it hard for a person to move on. Fortunately, for you, you haven't totally joined the wt org.

S

jgnat

HI, I am a non-JW married to a Witness. I studied the beliefs and found too many failures for me to join.

My son is recovering from a dual diagnosis of Schizophrenia and drug abuse. It's a long, hard road and very humbling. Congratulations on your continued recovery!

I would advise you to avoid committing to baptism as long as you have doubts. Trust your gut, and start building healthy relationships outside of the Watchtower society.

And congratulations again on your continued recovery!

transhuman68

Welcome to JWN. You certainly have been around. Yes the Witnesses are a high- control group and there is a lot of pressure to conform. It sounds as if you need some sort of support group though- have you tried Narcotics Anonymous? They should be non-religious in the U.K. I imagine.

Found Sheep

You may be looking at your life and be giving the JW's credit for your life style change. I'm glad you are clean of drugs and having "friends" and something to put your mind in may have helped break that cycle. That being said, now that your mind is free of druggs PLEASE do all the research you can about JW's. This site is good, read Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franze and Steve Hansens book on Releasing the bonds... I think if you could read them and this site and still believe JW's are the "truth" then you are already gone...

Best wishes and welcome

jean-luc picard

Welcome to the forum Darren.

Im glad to hear that the jws have helped you during a difficult time in your life.

That is what Christianity is all about, with NO CONDITIONS.

Many of us here, however, do not feel that there are no conditions, with jws.

I agree with WMF above. It is a good thing that they have helped you with the drugs, etc.

However, they are not the only religion who can produce testimonies of people they have helped

(though they like to think they are).

You are not baptised. Dont rush or allow yourself to be pushed, in that direction.

can somebody shed some light on me?

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