Hello everyone,
I'm really distraught about the fact my 23 year old daughter is ready to abandon a potential career in writing where her talent lies, and become a Jehovah's Witness. I banned the study being held in our home, but it only hurt my relationship with my daughter, who screamed at me "I pay to live here and I'm not hiding, you're sabotaging my relationship with God!" so I gave in.
My friends are trying to console me with "It's not a murderous gang, it's a group of good people." but I have read the bible, studied countless religions (and come to the conclusion there are none that have God's full backing.) studied with Jehovah's Witnesses, attended meetings, and conventions, and my internet research of recent times confirmed my suspicions. It's just another false religion, and worse, it's a cult. And my daughter will be walking the street spreading a doctrine that doesn't originate with Jesus Christ, and i believe the witnesses are actually anti-christian because JESUS CHRIST IS THE WAY, AND THE TRUTH and the witnesses hardly give him any recognition, all i ever hear is "Jehovah God." Jesus Christ said "Come to me." and they teach "Come to the Watchtower." I also believe the memorial is a load of rubbish and it's DENYING christ. I worry that she doesn't fully comprehend that spreading alternate gospel is what makes her bloodguilty, not "failing to go door to door when you know the truth through the faithful and discreet slave." which is the rubbish i heard coming from her teacher during her lesson the other day.
I KNOW she doesn't 100% believe is it "the truth." I can't even type that without feeling nauseous. I'm skeptical of anything claiming to be honest, in the first place, so my daughter turns it against me, calling me a cynic, and thanks to her teacher, a highly esteemed pioneer in the congregation, I am now "Satan." and the lesson in my home is hindered by demonic influence. My daughter believes it! Her teacher also is eager to get into my daughter's bedroom, telling her that something in there is the reason she isn't progressing faster. My daughter has a stunning portrait of Marilyn Monroe i bought her and she thinks THAT is Satan because of what Marilyn Monroe represented! I'm just speechless. The brainwashing has well and truly begun. My daughter is already not mentally well due to years of depression and anxiety, so something like this can only make her worse.
She wanted me to attend meetings to show me that it was a "good and beneficial thing." So, I went along and loathed every second and slept through most of them. But i went in the hope of having a discussion with her later about the ridiculous things that were being said on the platform. Each and every time she'd just report it back to her teacher who has an answer for everything. My daughter is extremely intelligent but won't stand up for herself, either. Worse, she feels like her teacher is truly blessed because this girl said to reiterate that the internet is demonic "I've never had apostate influence because i was brought up in the truth and always protected by the holy spirit." FOR THE LOVE OF.......!!!!!!!!
She even spent time reading on this website and the next discussion we had, she told me she doesn't believe in it anymore. Alleluia!!! She said she realized it when she was told to write a letter to the Catholic Church where she was baptized and couldn't write "I've found the truth with Jehovah's Witnesses." During her next 'bible' study, she brings up some awkward questions that her teacher pretty much ridiculed her for asking and "Stop reading that internet!" at which my daughter laughs and agrees with her. She even went to an elder who went on and on about how Satan uses everything to attack, etc. I have to wonder what the elder really thinks of her questioning, since asking such questions once baptized is at the risk of disfellowshipping!
Next, she agrees with me that disfellowshipping is cruel and unusual, and for that reason she is ready to distance herself from the JW's and stop studying. Come the meeting night, she's changed her mind again. This time she is convinced by a brother in good standing that "these people exist to make your life hard, they never tell the full story, and there's no excuse for sour grapes because they knew before they were baptized what would get them disfellowshipped." She agreed with HIM after that.
But because he apparently just came to her out of the blue to say this stuff, she came home telling me NOW she wants to leave because of the gossip. She thinks her teacher has spoken to him behind her back about her lack of progress. When she confronted her teacher, the teacher said "We don't gossip." HA! So this guy is a mind reader, clearly, and my daughter is satisfied with her lies.
She has abandoned her "worldly" friends so she's got nothing now but JW's which frightens me. She told her teacher this who can now use it against her and does, telling her "you're not being rejected, we just can't hang out with you yet." More incentive for her to get baptized and be 'blessed' with these conditional friendship. They tell her how well she's doing in it and even she says "I hate how my spirituality and relationship with God is almost being measured." She really is a GOOD girl, the fact that she's still considered bad association is a joke. I've tried telling her what it'll be like once she's baptized if she thinks her spirituality is being measured NOW, but there's no getting through to her.
I know she isn't 100% about this, but WHAT KEEPS HER GOING BACK! I'm just at wits end. When i studied with JWs 20 years ago, i wasn't aware of the hall politics and the gossiping, so i guess my question is: if my daughter is questioning things during her lesson, and enquiring about TRUTHS that i've directed her to, then going down to the hall and these people are talking to her, are they giving her everything to fight me back with? Is that how it works with studies? I might be wrong, but is this marking?
I've resigned myself to the hideous fact that the more time she spends with them, and they encourage her not to listen to me, the baptism is inevitable. Thank you for reading, i know it's long and complicated, but i really needed to vent and all input is so greatly appreciated.