What if your Significant Other wanted to become a JW?

by Dune 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Dune
    Dune

    Today, I was ambushed by a pair of witnesses while leaving my apartment. They offered me a magazine, to which i declined, but gave the latest awake & watchtower to my girlfriend. At our next stop, I took the magazines, rolled them up and was about to toss them when she told me that she wanted to read them. I was surprised at first, considering that she knows about my JW past, including the fact that I had just completed a successful fade when i first met her, but I handed them to her and jokingly told her that I'd leave her if she started going to meetings, to which she laughed and teased me for a bit. We later read some of the awake article and made off colored jokes about the articles & writing style.

    This had me thinking though. I know it sounds bad, but if she DID started studying, attending meetings and going door-to-door, I probably would end the relationship (hell, she'd probably have to end the relationship since she’d come to know me as a conniving Apostate). I'm a laid back, not controlling, relatively easy going person, but the idea of being in a relationship with a JW just disturbs me in so many ways.

    So, what would you do if your significant other started to study and seriously consider becoming a JW?

  • CAMELOT
    CAMELOT

    I would be very careful on how to deal with it. I just disassociated myself 3 days ago. Can you tell me what a fade is? I never heard of it until now. I have an adult daughter in the organization and if I drifted away but she found out I was going to another church or saw me celebrating the holidays with my youngest child, wouldn't I be DF'ed anyone even though I had faded away? She would tell the elders and they would DF me, right? How does a fade work?

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    chill... you are still on JW mindset that if someone reads a mag they will see the light of truth and become a JW.... truth is you have LOTS of time to kill any satanic light she reads. you could at this time remind her of all the insane belifes they have and don't advertise in the "public' mag

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    Camalot? I think you are a froud trying to get info? ALERT

  • Dune
    Dune

    No problem camelot. And congrats on taking the first step.

    I was still living with my parents when i wanted to leave the religion. I didn't want to rock the boat, and didn't know what would happen if i outright Diassociated myself. So instead I started going to other congregations and slowly stopped going to the meetings. It reached the point where i was so off the grid where no one really bothered me except for the occasional call.

    You never know what will happen, it really just depends on your congregation, if the elders there have a personal vendetta against you or have a hardline stance. The elders in my old congregation just left me alone save for the calls, but no announcements were made.

    @found sheep. Even if cam is a fraud, its fine by me, I'm been gone for so long that I just see it as a big joke.

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    sorry not gone long enough to see the joke but enough to know that it probably is a joke... you know I'm still a bit pissssed off at fraud people

  • Found Sheep
    Found Sheep

    so if you are further along on the progress of letting go the me I gess I have no advice

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Same as if she became an alchoholic, crack addict or prostitute.

    S

  • Reality79
    Reality79

    If I was in your shoes and she wanted to become a witness and actually started to go down that road, I would end the relationship, simple as that. She wouldn't have to worry about any "opposition" because we would already be done.

    It takes a very long time to rid yourself of the JW mindset, I'm not about to do that only for my partner to then start studying with those cultish relationship/family breakers and then have to eventually share my bed with one of them. It's just not gonna happen. The S.O. has the free will to do what they wanna do, so I wouldn't get in the way of that. While she's strolling towards dub land I'll be packing my things and getting out of dodge.....

  • LouBelle
    LouBelle

    I'd get a dialogue going, ask what specifically interested her/him in the mag and why. During that dialogue I would also remind them about the things the witnesses are not upfront about.

    If that failed and they wanted to become a JW, it would be difficult but I would probably end the relationship. I don't want to ever go down that path again every again - nothing is worth it.

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