You're right,ABibleStudent,but I think Witnesses,for the most part,like to stick their nose in other people's business. They like to put out their opinion and judge.
They have no problem shunning,but as long as it's someone they told you to shun.
MS shuns Witness parents
by EmptyInside 34 Replies latest jw friends
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jeckle
I am doing the same thing wth my whacked out dad and stepmom. But hopefully he comes a step further and leaves the cult. Hey my son gets scared if i raise my voice a little the last thjing he needs is my dad gritting his teeth and yelling thru them I honestly don't know how he did it but he did, and clinching his fist pounding them thru walls breaking stuff throwing it at you. Or asking you if your man enough to fight him yet.lifting me off the ground by my throat, shaking me, punching kicking enough to hurt and terrorize but not enough to leave marks. At 9 I had a crush on my stepsister's bff who happened to be a jdub too. We were in the same class I forgot my math book she lent me hers and when he found out he beat me with it in front of her of course oit mostly hit my back cause I was crouched over. So how much confidence do you think I had during my life?
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dgp
I feel he is simply not talking to his parents, and the fact that they are all Jehovah's witnesses may be incidental. Perhaps he would have endured the beatings anyways. I don't think this is shunning in the Watchtower sense.
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VIII
My mom is still an advocate of a good beating. She confirmed it in the last few weeks. "If only people gave their kids a good beating, with a belt or strap, these a$$hole kids would listen and not be in trouble."
I couldn't tell you what context the conversation was about, however, she is still a firm believer in the *pull your hair*, *hit with what-ever-tool is in your hand to make a point* camp.
Lovely, Christian, *WWJD* mentality. (PUKE)
Believe me, this MS's parents are lucky they even see him and his family at JW events.
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Band on the Run
Abusers don't worry who is going to support them in the future. They don't realize no child will be at their deathbed. I no longer see beatings as strictness. It is abuse. What is missing is impulse control.
The WT could start a campaign to make it clear that strictness and scripture forbid beatings and mental cruelty. They treat women as worse than dirt. I never considered it until now but they hate children even more than they hate women.
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EmptyInside
No,dgp,it's not sanctioned Watchtower shunning. That is why other Witnesses are upset with him. They feel he should forgive and forget and let his parents see his kids.
But,my point is ,they don't care about disfellowshipped ones. I have friends who are in their late 30's now. Who were disfellowshipped as teenagers. The one is married with children now,but her mother doesn't see her kids because my friend is disfellowshipped. Her little girl asked her if her grandmother had died,since she doesn't visit them. That is sad. The Witnesses have no problem holding grudges against someone who may have exercised poor judgement as a teenager. They'll hold it against them the rest of their life. But,they can judge someone else for cutting off family who more than likely left him wth some pretty deep,emotional scars.
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White Dove
"Hitting your kids is archaic and lacks imagination."--Blondie or Mary...forget which.
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talesin
"Hitting your kids is common assault and CAN and SHOULD be prosecuted as an offense under the Criminal Code of Canada."
-- talesin
(on a personal note ,,, people who BEAT their kids with belts should be HORSEWHIPPED!!!!!!!!!!!!)
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Blind_Of_Lies
I am about to propose a radical new idea that will shake the congregation to its very core… ready? … sit down… here it comes….
Brothers and Sisters: Mind your own damn business! What business of theirs is it if he talks to his parents or lets his parents see the kids and potentially open them up to similar abuses!?!?!? He is protecting his children!
The man was ABUSED in the name of YOUR god in front of people just like YOU. They sat there in the KH listening to speeches about the great and loving god Jehovah while they could hear the child crying because he had just been beaten in the back room for doing what kids do. This religion is SICK and quite frankly a very serious legal inquest needs to be formed regarding the treatment of children the sexual and physical abuse not to mention the pure mental torture they subject their kids too is amazing.
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aristeas
EmptyInside:
Here are some hopefully insightful thoughts.
I find it interesting that the parents are seeking their son's forgiveness. Then they must have realized how they messed up!
As a survivor of very selfish, NON-JW, highly physically abusive, and totally non-insightful, stupid parents, I can only say what many have heard before on a variety of topics: you have to have experienced s.t. personally in order to understand fully the dynamics going on. When I was a very active pioneer, I studied with one strange couple who overly disciplined their little boy. Once while we were all out in service, the new bro. (or bro.-to-be, I can't remember if he was baptised yet) unjustly smacked the boy in public. When the father looked away, the boy gave him a look that just caused my own childhood memories to come flooding back. This lil guy was feeling EXACTLY how I did growing up. It was so emotional for me that I have to excuse myself (and I'm not a particularly emotional guy). That look on the boy's face spoke the volumes/years of frustration that I remembered feelilng at his age and for years afterward.
Three things I hope to convey by relating this:
-it's not just JWs who overly discipline their kids and then, when the PARENTS have grown up and finally matured, regret their past behavior. But in many ways, it's far too late. The damage cannot be undone. It's a human problem in (hopefully now somewhat past) western culture and it's a generational thing. Don't just blame JWs. My parents were never religious at all, just red-necked, conservative, uneducated lost souls. I might add that this was quite normal in the working class neighbourhood I grew up in—all non-JW families.
-in the end the parents must pay too, not just the victims. One sister of mine won't speak to one brother; my mother is given token attention by all her children now in her old age—no real love. She's reaped what she sowed. When my alcoholic father was dying of lung cancer from all his stupid smoking, mom got less than full support from all her chilldren. Two of us, more morally motivated types, gave her some support, but the lack of that from others, along with the lack of a truly loving home life from childhood, tore the famly even further apart.
-don't judge the victim! I realize that many here don't even believe in God any more or have much respect for the Bible, but for those of us who still do, consider this: is it not interesting that nowhere in scripture does it tell children in particular to love their parents? Instead it says to honor them. There's a real difference here. Do you have any idea how harsh people in biblical itmes must have been on their kids? Think aobut that! Do you really suppose that 'modern' thinking prevailed then? If so, WAKE UP! Throughout childhood I was an atheist, turned believer in my young 20s, turned JW later, turned fader after that, and it took a lot for me to come to terms with the way my 'worldly' parents had raised me, what the Bible says about forgiveness, etc. In the end, I figured that, given what the scriptures said, I was under obligation to honor, not love them—but nonetheless to forgive them. Each victim of such an upbringing must come to terms individually. If this young adult here, now a parent himself, must work out all his feelings and the various dynamics involved, including scriptural principles, then GIVE THE GUY A BREAK! Let him do so at his own pace.
My two cents' worth. . .