A few mornings back I was in the bathroom of the office building I work at. I was washing my hands and I felt a rush of thoughts flood my mind. The job I am doing for my client is an immense social network site. There is just so much to do in so little time. Even though I am up to the task I was still overwhelmed with the scope. Also this is such a different lifestyle for me, I am used to pet programming projects, World of Warcraft and Hot Pockets. I looked into the mirror and just stood there for a bit and tried to breath deep. I always get angry with myself when I feel the depression coming on and it feeds into it creating a vicious cycle. I was mad at myself for letting it come this far and now it had a chance of overtaking me.
I walked out of the bathroom and into the hall trying to be as calm as possible. I couldn't give it another inch. I must have looked like I was being chased by Jason Bourne or something. As I walked I mostly thought about all the things I had to get done between now and the next few months. Dozens of tasks that will take dozens of hours of work each. As I opened the door to my office I let out a defeating sigh, and when I walked inside I heard an internal voice of a friend of mine say, "You sure sigh a lot."
I replied out loud, "I am well aware of it" because it was true. I have been sighing a lot because of a stressful job, but too many defeating sighs are just giving the Depression Dog juicy steaks.
After that little internal exchange I started to feel better and was able to get to work.
-Sab