Dumb ass family moved in next door with autistic kid JEHOOVER HELP!

by Witness 007 32 Replies latest jw experiences

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    I'm the mom of one.

    Well, I must say that the music being loud enough to disturb the neighbors does need to be dealt with.

    So, how would I like to be notified about my son's music being too loud?

    Visit the mom and try talking with her.

    Be nice, respectful.

    Try to come up with a solution together.

    If that doesn't work, then, yes, speak with the cops and see what they suggest, if anything.

    But, goodness gracious, don't swear or use rude words in your dealings with anyone.

  • mummatron
    mummatron

    Get some earplugs. Or pop in your own earbud headphones and play some 21st century music...Or better still, a spoken word book on empathy and political correctness, and thank Jehoover you have fully functional ears and aren't on the autistic spectrum yourself!

    Mummatron - teacher to teens on the autistic spectrum, former LSA to a 4 year old autistic boy, and cousin to boy with AS.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    My neighbors used to practically harrass me about the noise my boy would make while I was out of the house for the day.

    He was an older teenager but didn't have a handle on the noise factor.

    They threatened to turn us in to the LL and the cops and CPS.

    I really didn't know what to do.

    Still don't have an answer for it, and I couldn't take him just everywhere with me all the time.

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    Sorry for using the word retard to descibe the mum I had some drinks and was mad on Sunday.

    However I dont understand this woman when I complain about the noise sort of shruggs her shoulders and says "he's autistic"...she told me her husband just left her because "he could'nt handle it anymore..." I can smpathize with him. ALL kids need rules, do you let them take matches and light small brush fires...because "their autistic?"no. Is it so hard for her to move the stereo inside.

    P.S woke me up again today...I'm dead tired here at work.

  • JustThatGirl007
    JustThatGirl007

    She definitely needs to address the problem better. It's terrible that she's a single parent to this boy now. Support is the biggest thing Special Needs parents need and who better to do that than your spouse? Someone who gets it. Parenting my boy is sometimes the hardest thing in the world to do! (On the flip side, I find him to also be the easiest kid to parent because, for him, everything is concrete. I don't have to figure out nuances of behavior with him like I do w/ my neuro-typical kids.)

    It sounds like this woman needs some outside resources to help her son.

    I still think you should call the police because you have ALREADY tried talking to her and have been blown off. Calling the police will maybe give her a wakeup call. It's not a huge issue -- the kid's music is too loud, she needs to have him turn it down, she won't, so let the cops do it.

    She's using her son's diagnosis as an excuse. Autism is the REASON, it should never be the ESCUSE.

    My boy screams and freaks out if I tell him we're leaving the house. Reason: Autism. Excuse? Not at all. I realize the autism makes him want to stay home, in his little, safe, coccoon. But in order to function in real life, sometimes you have to go outside your little comfort zone. So we go anyway. Letting him use it as an excuse would mean letting him stay home and, therefore, changing the whole family's day to suit him.

    The neighbor is using autism as an excuse to let her son listen to his music at ridiculous levels and disrupt the neighbors. Not cool. She is doing him a disservice, and herself, because it's NOT going to make for good neighbor relations if she keeps it up.

  • JustThatGirl007
    JustThatGirl007

    Also, Witness007, thank you for your apology on using the R word.

  • Mary
    Mary
    Get some earplugs. Or pop in your own earbud headphones and play some 21st century music...Or better still, a spoken word book on empathy and political correctness, and thank Jehoover you have fully functional ears and aren't on the autistic spectrum yourself

    Sorry, but that's just ridiculous. Empathy is one thing, but there's far too much 'political correctness' bullshit going on these days. Now you're suggesting that the neighbours just suck it up and buy earplugs because one mother is too inconsiderate to teach her son some manners and good behaviour? He's autistic, not brain-dead. Autistics can be well-functioning, respectful and considerate; just like everyone else if they're taught to be like that. Clearly the mother hasn't done so and apparently doesn't give a rat's ass about being a good neighbour.

    Too much of 'everyone's got Rights' but no one's got responsibility these days.

  • wolfman85
    wolfman85

    I was surprised to see how people are so insensitive. I am a father of a 17 year old boy with severe autism. Although few people are able to use empathy, only those who have children with this disability know the challenges, efforts, dedication and above all, love needed to care for them. How cruel can become some due to their ignorance. I would say more, but my English is limited and I lack words to express what I feel with this entry.

  • lovelylil
    lovelylil

    I believe you still have to train a child as to right and wrong even if they have a disability. I don't think it is insensitive to want to live in peace and not hear blasting music all day. The father of the child probably left the family because the child was out of control and the mother just gave up even trying to parent. My nephew is autistic and I know having a good routine or schedule will probably help. Also the mother should have purchased an ipod with headsets so the kid could listen to music without disturbing anyone.

  • Witness 007
    Witness 007

    Sorry for my first post here I get alittle "Mel Gibson" after afew drinks....so I went a couple times to see my next door, not home, told her mum I'll catch her later, so tonite she comes over all scared standing a half mile away {I'm a big man .....but kind!!} I explain using my "Witness" tactfulness the story. Amazingly she says "OH I'll make sure he turns it down..." I say well you haven't done that up till now so....I give her the CD walkman...she seems taken back "no you dont have to" "Well maybe he will use this instead..." She starts negotiating "what times CAN he play loud music" I'm like, no, at no time. I'm a shift worker so now Im on nightshift. Who gives you the right to blast your next door with music.....how would she like my porn movies being blasted out the window.....anyhow she said she would get the stereo back inside the house so I hope to Allah she does.

    My boss has complained I'm nodding off at work so my job is on the line.....thats why I got so angry. Sorry I love you all!

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