73 year old woman sues estranged children for "parental support"

by Scully 11 Replies latest social current

  • Scully
    Scully

    I just finished reading this article... http://ca.news.yahoo.com/kids-were-no-angels-mom-whos-suing-parental-141531701.html

    Background: Strict parent, whose children regard their upbringing as "brutal", is now suing her children for parental support. The lady is 73 years old and is "estranged" from her 4 living children and 10 grandchildren.

    I can see the WTS glomming on to legal cases like this for its older members who have had to shun their DFd children, and then when the kids want nothing to do with the parents when they fall ill [and the WTS tells them to ask those DFd adult children for financial support] they've found a way to punish the DFd kids even further by getting court orders to pay for parental support. In fact, I've highlighted some parts of the article that have a distinct JW "aroma" to them.

    Kids 'were no angels,' mom who's suing for parental support claims

    Vancouver Province Vancouver Province – Thu, 22 Sep, 2011

    Kids 'were no angels,' mom who's suing for parental support claims

    Kids 'were no angels,' mom who's suing for parental support claims

    A Kootenays woman waging a bitter legal battle to get money from her adult children says she is not the monster she's been made out to be, just an "ordinary stay-at-home mom."

    Shirley Anderson, 73, broke her silence Wednesday to insist that her four sons and one daughter had a good but strict upbringing and that she doesn't deserve to be destitute, sick and alone in her old age.

    Anderson sued her five children almost 12 years ago under the Family Relations Act, arguing that they had a duty to provide parental support.

    Anderson, who in 2000 was awarded $10 per month per child, claims it was her lawyer's idea to ask the court on Sept. 20 to increase that to $750 per month in total. The judge reserved decision.

    "In 2008, I was forced to sue them all over again in a bid to recover parental support payments that had not been paid by two of my children," Anderson told The Province. "My health had deteriorated even more by that point."

    Anderson said her lawyer can no longer afford to work for her pro bono and she can't afford to pay for a lawyer.

    "[My children] are not destitute, they still take trips to Hawaii while I'm forced to live under the poverty line," said Anderson.

    She claims she "basically raised my kids alone" because her husband Gary, a Labatt's truck driver, "was always on the road. "I might have been strict, but that's the way I was raised, with discipline. "They were no angels," said Anderson.

    "My daughter was good, but the boys were hell on wheels. Not many mothers go to bed at night saying a prayer that their sons don't kill themselves or someone else. They partied hard."

    Her son, Ken Anderson, 47, who paid his mom $10 per month for more than a decade, asked B.C. Supreme Court this week to dismiss his mother's litigation against him and his siblings.

    "I'm done paying her and if the court awards her more money, after she's used government money to go after us for the last 12 years, I won't pay a cent," said Ken, a logging-truck driver whose wife Sherry represented him in court. "We have our own family and we haven't saved for our own retirement.

    "If you have good parents, like my wife's parents, you don't mind helping. My upbringing was just brutal, and I was basically abandoned at age 15."

    Anderson admitted that she is estranged from all of her 10 grandchildren and her adult children. One son died recently and another is in and out of jail.

    Anderson, who said she rarely leaves her apartment, is ill with lupus, two kinds of arthritis and requires expensive chemotherapy medications.

    She receives $1,554.44 a month from the Canada Pension Plan and Old Age Security, but says she can't afford her medications and has to rely on the food bank.

    "It's alleged I abandoned them in their teens, but Ken lived with us until he was 18. Our daughter got a brand-new car on her graduation."

    Anderson admitted most of her kids left home before "the age of majority, but that was the way things were back then. They had a normal upbringing. "I stayed home as women did in the '50s and '60s to give my kids a good life and now I need their help."

    [email protected]

  • minimus
    minimus

    Those Canadians!

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Hey Scully..

    When I read that..I thought the same thing you did..

    JW`s?..

    I couldn`t imagine sueing my children..

    I can`t believe the courts let her do it..Thats just cold..

    ..................;-)...OUTLAW

  • Violia
    Violia

    In the states we have what is called adult protective society. I am not entirely sure but anyone who tries to take advantage of an adult, elderly or disabled, can be reported to them. I am not sure if you could make a case for abandonment of a parent here in the states or not. She is disabled it appears.

    I took care of both of my parents even when they did not deserve it. They did give me life and had to care for me when I was a baby and small child. Of course that is their duty but not all parents do. At least they did not let me starve. My therapist used to tell me " any childhood you survive is a good one" . Whether you like his take on life or not, I agree. Their on no guarantees in life. I would think the children would at least make sure their mother had basic things. They said the girl got a car on graduation- wow, not too bad. I never got a car. Maybe these are just bratty kids who think the world owes them everything.

    There are two sides to every story.

    also, the money she receives is not that bad. many here in the states do not receive that much from SS.

  • GOrwell
    GOrwell

    For *all* of the children (and even the grandchildren) to have basically disowned her sounds pretty interesting.. and yes there are 2 sides to every story, but the one side of this story is likely pretty small LOL. It's not just one or two kids that are feeling vindicative or justified in their choice, but all of them, and that tells me there is quite a bit of truth to their upbringing.

  • Scully
    Scully

    OUTLAW

    I think it's hilarous that in the original case the judge ordered each of the kids to pay her $10/month ($50/month total with 5 kids). He mustn't have thought that she deserved much to award such a paltry amount.

    I have to wonder about her treatments though - if she could have them done in hospital (the one where I work has a Day Unit where people go for their chemotherapy and it's all covered under the Health Care Act) and not have any out-of-pocket expenses, particularly because she is a senior - there should be a universal drug plan for seniors in BC like there is in most other provinces. There must be some way she can get these treatments without having to sue her kids for financial support. I would suggest involvement from a Social Worker / Social Services before suggesting that she sue her kids.

    Legal bills, lawsuits against your kids .... I would think the stress of all that wouldn't be great for someone with lupus and two kinds of arthritis.

    WTF kind of mother sues her kids anyway??

    If this lady is actually a JW, I would encourage her to sue her congregation and the WTS for support too, especially if they instructed her to shun and be estranged from her children.

    "Whatever a man is sowing, this he will also reap."

    Karma's a bitch, ain't it, lady??

  • Scully
    Scully

    Violia:

    In the states we have what is called adult protective society. I am not entirely sure but anyone who tries to take advantage of an adult, elderly or disabled, can be reported to them. I am not sure if you could make a case for abandonment of a parent here in the states or not. She is disabled it appears.

    The protective societies are to protect the elderly from being taken advantage of and from being abused. Disabled or not, this woman has had no problem being estranged from her children and grandchildren for decades - presumably she made no efforts at reconciliation or forging an amicable relationship - she simply wants money from them. The children aren't trying to force her to sell her home and split the profits, they aren't trying to put her in a home against her will, they aren't abusing her or trying to take advantage of her.

    For all of her children to want to cut ties with their own mother and have nothing to do with her, says more about the mother and the way she treated the children while she raised them than it does about the kids.

    If she has her own home, she could take in boarders for the extra money.

  • shamus100
    shamus100

    Yeah, well,

    I know some people deserve to be cut off with no contact. It is usually brutally toxic people that deserve it, and in extreme circumstances I completely agree that there be a complete cutting off for those that constantly meddle in people's lives and get off on causing disruption.

    I've done it.

  • clarity
    clarity

    I would die before I would ASK my kids for money! Never mind sueing them for it!!!!

    >

    This Lady doesn't understand ... mothering doesn't stop at 15! What is she doing for them now ... and those grandkids omg.?

    >

    And don't give me the crap "I'm so sick", we're all kinda sick after 40... but most just suck it up and stop being the little stay-at-home and go out and get some paid work!! I wouldn't say this if I hadn't done it myself.

    >

    Amen to this ... "If this lady is actually a JW, I would encourage her to sue her congregation and the WTS for support too, especially if they instructed her to shun and be estranged from her children"

    clarity

  • Bella15
    Bella15

    I understand the kids thou, they were at the receiving end ... I go through this every month when it is time to send my father money ... I do it out of my Christian duty but I remember the mistreatment, how he kicked me once when I fell and couldn't get up, the spankings with leather belts, ropes, plastic cables that would leave my body in shock and fevers ALL OF THIS WHILE HE WAS A JW and my mom was his cheerleader !!!! Anyway, I pray to God everytime I send the money to erase that bitterness and resentment against them, they were deceived by the WATCHTOWER and their lives was a living HELL inside them perhaps,,, they sacrificed the whole family - 7 children to that stupid organization they wanted to be zealous by beating the hell and the"world "out of us and taking us to "paradise" I guess.

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