How long can one continue as an unbelieving JW? (page 4)

mauiboy

Iamwhoiam.....Your comments worry me...I was there for 'way too long. Be careful. Be kind to yourself. Don't let depression take you down. The world is a beautiful place.....find your way into it before you find yourself in a place you can't return from. Best wishes to you. My heart cries for your peace and tranquility......I know your pain.

Botzwana

Been out over a year now. Never went back. Been visited three times by two Elders. Told them I was attending spanish and everything was fine. The regular publishers dropped me like a rock. They used to eat at my restaurant on the weekends. The first weekend I did not attend they never came back. Not in one year. Not to say hello or anything.

OneDayillBeFree

Well I'm a fader... probably one of the slowest there will ever be. Mentally I've been out for around a year. But I had doubts way before. For now I consider myself an undercover more than anything... not in an apostate kind of way though. I just don't believe in it anymore.

Its a strange way of life honestly, and I'm glad that I'm not the only one. Its nice to know I'm not alone. And it feels good when you can relate.

I'm a M.S, Regular Pioneer, went to Pioneer school while not believing, boy that was hell! Give talks -I actually have one next week...Damn, announcements, Read for the watchtower/Book study, the list goes on and on.

How long will I last? I honestly cant say. Several things happened in my life recently that helped me sort of lower myself spiritually in the Congregation. That is one of the best things to do honestly for all you lurkers thinking about fading.

Its something that has to be very, very meticulously planned, at least thats how it is in my case. And its the only thing that will work if you plan to still communicate with some Fam.

I call if the "Ideal Fade"

Many things must "fade" and slow enough for them to forget and not notice.

First goes commenting. That was hard to pull off.

Second is not being available to help in meetings. Pretty easy.

Come in late leave early. Be nice to them at this point and fake depression, injury, sickness.

Third is missing meetings. Now here I have to plan it out so that its seems inconsistant. And this step is usally the longest. Miss one meeting during the week at the beginning of the month, then a sunday meeting near the end of anther month. Oh and do something awesome when you dont go. Dont just sit there all sad and depressed, actually enjoy the time you have being free.

Then start dissobeying man made rules. Again slowly. Rebel a little. Grow out your hair, or shave it all. Forget to shave, if male. or wear a tighter, shorter skirt if you are a sis... Do what you wanna do for once.

Then stop meeting for field service during the week and miss every other weekend service meeting. (if aux or Reg Pioneer of course)

Then whenever going out door to door, do and speak as little as possible. ONLY take the mags. And be as superficial as possible. Speak about 1914, blood transfusions and Overlapping Generations and then pretend not to know what to say and show them some real truth. Forget about dignity, make yourself look bad if you can do it.

Step down as M.S

Step down as R.P

Stop attending Witness gatherings (parties) I mean really, they arent any fun at all anyways.

Make friends outside the borg.

Move congregations. the farther the better.

Lose contact with all the bros from your old hall. This one will be hard.

change phone #.

Change e-mail.

Delete all JDubbie friends from ALL Social Networks. Either that or you delete your profile and then make them again later whichever is best for you.

Then throw away most literature. Keep the Bible and song book, just in case.

Throw away No Blood card.

Start celebrating holidays and other things.

Go on vacation.

Meet new people

make new friends

start a relationship if single.

then throw away song book, keep Bible if it means something to you

travel.

Love unconditionally

And hopefully by then you'll be free.

Of course some things go differently and some things wont be possible. but I am a dreamer...

Its hard as hell, and sometimes I contemplate just getting D'fd for something stupid or DA myslef in the end. But my primary goal is to fade away and then disappear completely, and I believe that Ill do it One Day...

P.S. Manky, I cant put my finger on you. You seem to be pro JW one thread, then doubter JW the next. Whatever the case may be I wish you luck in figuring out what to do with your life.

JustHuman14

this question it might have many answers. It depends upon the circumstances of each indivitual. In my cases I lasted 5 years. I became innactive as soon I realize that my entire life was fake and based upon a lie, made by some humans who think they are "God's people". I was for 5 years innactive and then my ex-wife turned me to the elders for apostasy. She did this in fact not once, but two times!!! So I said I had enough of your religion and I gave them hard questions to the Judical Comitee(you know the ones you should never ask when you are JW)

As a result they refuse to answer and I said if you can't give me answers then I do not feel that I will going to support a religion that doesn't answers questions and request blind faith!!!

So actually it is upon you. The best thing it is to fade out so you can still associate your relatives and friends. They will just say that you are "weak in faith", and you don't have to go through the process of shunning

bigmac

i was brought up in it from age 9--baptised at 14

pioneered at 16-to about 20--on and off

servant at 18--magazine/territory.

married to a born-in at 20

father at 23--by then i knew i'd had enough of living the lie.

took me 8 years to finally break free--when my wife divorced me & stopped nagging me into attendance.

been free ever since--i'm now 63

paid a high rice for my freedom--shunned by my own kids most of their lives.

dont you just love jehovah and his official religion

00DAD

OneDayillBeFree: I think you should just skip to "Love unconditionally" and be done with the whole mess!

Of course it's easy for me to say, it took me close to a decade from the time I first began having serious doubts and concerns until the time I was out.

But more seriously, I am concerned in the meantime about all the faking and pretending you must do. THIS actually is what hurt me so much during the time period between when I began to wake up and the time I was finally out: You lose yourself, you are consciously a hypocrite and a liar.

I simply could not stand it any more and my life imploded. I wished I had taken a different route out, but that's easy to say in retrospect!

Keep us posted!

Daniel

ziddina

I hated the cult the second I saw it - at the age of 5 years old... No Halloween? No Christmas? No birthday parties? What the HELL were my parents thinking???

They had to beat me into the religion....

At the age of 7-8, I realized that the bible itself was purely man-made... After that, I just survived until I could get out - unfortunately the beatings and bullying locked me into the cult for a much longer period of time than I would have liked....

Had I had the phone numbers of my non-JW relatives, I would have gotten out when I was 10 - 13... If the vicious parents would have released me, that is.... They were possessive to the point of strangulation...

So, I was stuck in the cult until - at the age of 30 - I'd gotten my head clear of the beatings, bullying, and had built an "escape" route - full-time job, own place to live, "worldly" friends...

Therefore - 20 years of living a 'double' life - waiting to escape, which was rendered more difficult by marriage to a JW man....

And then I was out - and good riddance to the Watchtower Corporation's hypocritical filth!!

Zid the She-Devil - who was ALWAYS thoroughly PAGAN, even when they were trying to BEAT that Middle-Eastern bullshit into me...

Joliette

Makkeki, whatever the heck your name is Jehovah lover:

I got a question: Why are you on an apostate website? Doesnt your faithful and discreet slave, of course....in direction from your Jehovah and Jesus christ, tell you its wrong to do so? Didnt you read the November 2010 study edition of the watchtower where it said dont respond to apostate blogs, forums, messages board, etc. Your violating Jehovah's laws.

ziddina

"Manky, I cant put my finger on you. You seem to be pro JW one thread, then doubter JW the next. Whatever the case may be I wish you luck in figuring out what to do with your life. ..." OneDayI'llBeFree

I suspect that Mankkeli/Makkitup is actually several bored/fanatical Bethelites, all playing on the same computer...

That, or the stress has fractured his personality into shattered shards...

OneDayI'llBeFree, that list of yours on how to fade was AWESOME!!!!!

00DAD

Technically, the moment one becomes an unbeliever then that person is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses. It's like being alive and dead at the same time: impossible!

However, most of us gradually move from one state to the other finally arriving at UNBELIEVER status. Once your there, you're no longer a JW.

That being said, what Manky probably meant is:

Q: "How long can one FAKE being a JW while not believing everything the GB touts as 'Truth'?"
A: A long time ....

Fear of being DFd is powerful! And so many, many people remain Stuck In A Movement out of fear. Fear is the mind-killer.

The WTBTS creates fake cult personalities in the image of themselves, according to their likeness. - Genesis 1:26

So in effect, being a Witness is really a form of creature worship or idolatry.

How long can one continue as an unbelieving JW?

Share this