by Band on the Run 19 Replies latest jw friends
Mine was the blood doctrine. always questioned it in my own mind then questioned it with another elder then went on vacation then got back and was informed that the elder body wanted to talk to me then the CO came in and met with me and the rest of elder body then I was removed as an elder then started doing research on the internet then ordered Crisis of Conscience the started fading
IT'S A CULT
Doctrine is what I disagreed with. Their belief that salvation is through a man made organization is what made me leave.
I didn't even realize that I was mind controlled until I satisfied my thirst for explanations on 607/1914/1919. Once I realized there was no substance there....it freed me to begin looking in other areas. Eventually I started studying the psychology of being a witness and I realized how controlled I was. So it was doctrine that paved the way for me to even begin to notice that I was in a cult
I was all about doctrine. Particularly 1995's "generation" change opened my eyes. But I remained a JW with an adjusted "Watch out!" attitude.
Ultimately, it was unloving policy and abuse of position that became a last straw and made me look for the way out.
BAND ON THE RUN: Even though the two things are intertwined, it was the 1995 changed teaching of generation doctrine that did it for me. As far as I was concerned they should have packed it in at that point. Like you, I was also horrified at their attempts at high control. I resisted it every step of the way. It is a sobering thought to think of how damaged I as a single woman would have been if I did NOT resist the high-control and the ruthless nerviness directed at me. I am so glad to be out of there!
First it was the study edition. It just screams cult.
Then since i always question blood doctrine i went to the internet for the rest of the story.
Unbiblical stance on disfellowshipping sealed the deal.
Now just looking for escape!
There are a bunch of things that made me leave but for me at first it was just the outright lack of love within the org. I knew the Bible said true Christians would be noted for their love amongst themselves and I did not see love, I saw people looking down on others and even hatred of people they called their "brothers." I saw the way women are treated in the org. (and being a woman, I saw it first-hand). The blood doctine and shunning were the first doctrines that bothered me, then when they came out with that overlapping generations bullcrap I began questioning more. Now they actually outright say that we have to "obey the faithful and discreet slave class to have Jehovah's approval." So basically if I were to believe all the other lies they teach but not "obey" I would not be saved! Ridiculous. Now that I'm becoming a Christian I see that I actually was "ashamed of Christ" almost, in that I squirmed when I heard the name Jesus and only talked about Jehovah! So for me it's a combination of doctrine and the whole control thing that made me leave, but probably more doctrine than anything else, though the amount of control they have over people is pretty damn scary if you think about it.
I am curious as to whether the final gut deciding factor to leave was inappropriate doctrine or the overly intrusive control of the WT.
I was on the way out, due to terrible unhappiness with the Borg people and lifestyle, when I discovered the wts was misquoting many secular sources in their literature. No one told me that--I just looked stuff up in the library and found it for myself.
Then there was that delusional Revelation book study. I realized they were total nutjobs. Believing in Santa Claus would be more sane than that.
I was physically and financially abused as a child and young adult, but I thought once I was away from Dubbie Dearest that would end. Then I realized the other dubs began to bully and otherwise victimize me in the same manner, and I left.
Looking back, it was a combination. I NEVER believed some of the tripe in the Revelation book, even when I was a card carrying dub.
I also knew there was something amiss with the control, to the point that as a child I wondered if 'the truth' was an experiment to see how much bullshit a person would accept.
Doctrinal issues first ... I didn't realize the cultish controlling nature until I'd been out for a while.
It's amazing in hind-sight, but a common thing in abusive/controlling relationships, but the abused generally doesn't realize how much they've been manipulated until they are out of the relationship. Even then it often takes time and the insight from a professional (whether through individual therapy or by reading mind-opening books, etc.) for one to realize the damage done.
I think it would not be an overstatement to say that JWs suffer from the same kinds of trauma and abuse as typical of Battered Wife Syndrome.
