Please vote for my JW Novel: Happiness: How To Find It! (page 2)

donuthole

" neither kind nor cruel... just true." -- That is exactly what I try to do in my writing. :-)

Sorry Anthony, but the synopsis and the style are awfully reminiscent of endless Mills & Boon story lines: Repressed and unrequited love insinuating its way into unsuspecting hearts. Remove the somewhat starchy JW overlay and any remaining interest evaporates.

donuthole

@steve2

I'm not familiar with Mills & Boon, but it probably isn't that far off based on your description. I've always joked to my friends about doing a JW romance. (It was going to be called Servant to Love. LOL) Since I had such a heavy work/school load this year I decided go ahead and write it. I enjoy it -- it is simple and fun, though probably not for everyone's tastes. Thank you for your input!

clarity

Hi .... first of all it is great to see you here again!

Loved the story line, it works with the jw overlay.

My impression (only) ... as I read, two styles of 'talking' are in my ear.

The banter between the 3 women in Missouri with their 'southern' lingo and accent .... and the the sudden intrusion of hard jw lingo.

Don't know if I'm saying it right, but for instance the line ...........

"the son of their congregation’s presiding overseer."

>

My ear wanted to hear something like "our sour old preacher man's boy."

Softening up the jw talk.

Very good luck with your endeavor ... looking forward to reading the rest.

clarity

edited to say ... I voted for you

elder-schmelder

I voted.

arwen

I voted.. seems like a great read..

brizzzy

Voted! :) Looks like you're in 2nd place at the moment; good luck! (Voting is at the bottom of the page if anyone is looking; it took me a while to find it).

steve2

Hi Anthony, your good grace in response to my criticism is appreciated. Notwithstanding my earlier comments, I have voted for you.

donuthole

@steve2 Thank you for your vote. No really -- I'm fully aware of your points. I usually write much, much different stuff that asks big questions and delves into some pretty heavy (even dark) territory. I originally envisioned this as a send-up on those formulaic Nicholas Spark's type stories, but I do think over the course pf the novel it evolves into something more, hopefully, moving beyond a JW overlay on a romance. At least that is the intent, whether or not I succeeded is another matter.

@others

Thank you for your votes! My intention is to publish this online starting sometime in early 2012. I'll probably do a chapter a week and then a free e-book at the end. I'll be sure to keep JWD updated on where/when you can read more.

CandleLight

I voted too.. Enjoyed the first chapter. Reminded me of my days doing rural territory in SE Kansas.. I think people who used to be JW will enjoy the details, but I think the general theme will appeal to others as well..

Look forward to reading the rest.

Please vote for my JW Novel: Happiness: How To Find It!

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