"Freeing" those "trapped" in the Organization. (page 2)

cantleave

As has been said, they need to be ready.

diamondiiz

It seems to me, fairly obvious what you're getting yourself into

Not quite. I was young and ignorant at 17 when I got sucked in, what the fuck did I know about religions and cults. They used the bible, offered a "bible" based story and I fell for it - besides it was my "close friend" which I never knew he was a dub prior to. Interesting fellow to say the least. Others get recruited in their time of weakness, when people die, someone is sick, poverty and better life appeals to them. Once you're in, you don't see the problem until something happens so you wake up and realize where you are.

As far as your father is concerned. if he's not too old, I don't see a problem with trying to free him. When there is an opportunity slip something he may want to discuss, then you can introduce some facts for him to ponder about. He may talk further or he may shut down as cult personality will kick in and there will be no more talk of religion for that day. Before you do that, you will need to actually learn some facts and not just hearsay. Anything you bring up, you have to back it up by either watchtower articles, court documents or something where he can't deny it as being apostate propaganda. You know your father best and how he reacts to discussing wts. If you do end up having a conversation try to stay on the topic you're prepared to discuss otherwise tell him you will look it up and get back to him. It is difficult to get a cult member to wake up and at times it may not be worth it depending on their circumstances. What helped my wife was, when I left the borg, she went in service more than she did in years prior, so I asked her how can she honestly tell strangers about 1914 when it's a proven lie. I had two books, Crisis Of Conscience and Gentiles Times Reconsidered which she read on her own in her due time. I was pushy with her on the wts teachings which never got far but at least she did hear and managed to read the books. After GTR, she was done with the cult. She never DA and was never DF. If she sees people in public she hasn't been shunned but we have no JW visitors from the KH here. Her immediate family still talks to us knowing our positions. So there is always hope for your father if the circumstances are right.

Different approaches work for different people, and it's probably similar to when JWs recruit but in reverse. If you come off like a know it all you may not get very far with your father.

dozy

I've got mixed feelings about actively encouraging my family members to leave ( that is , those who already don't shun me & my immediate family ). For many , especially older ones , the "truth" is the only thing they have. All their friends , social life , even employment is built around their association with the WTBTS. For some , it has bettered their lives - got them out of drug or alcohol abuse. Other than the remote possibility ( thanks to medical advances )that they might suffer from not taking a blood transfusion , how "trapped" or damaged are they?

One elderly relative told me that it would "break his heart" if "the truth" wasn't "the truth" and that he would feel that he had wasted his life. He admitted that he really didn't want to open Pandoras box. I think he knows in his heart of hearts that it isn't the truth , but is scared of the implications.

Maybe it is the residual JW mindset , but I find it difficult in knowing where we draw the line in "freeing" those whom we think are misled. Knock on the door of the Mormon tabernacle & tell them what a fraud Joseph Smith was? Ditto the born agains or baptists? The local Labour club or Conservative association / Democrats or Republicans & tell them their policies are all wrong and their leaders are useless at best or frauds at worst? A good friend of mine is heavily into homeopathy - spending lots of money on it. She feels that it has tangibly helped her. I think it is a complete load of rubbish and that she is being ripped off & exploited and I have mentioned this several times to her with and had very defensive responses - do I spend hours trying to convince her? Do we accept that in a complex world , people rightly or wrongly will believe in things we don't believe in , or devote their lives to pointless or even somewhat damaging projects & lifestyles based on false expectations or promises?

Having said that , there is certainly no harm in providing information (sites like JWFacts & freeminds are excellent) and insider material like Franz's book are fascinating. With my children , I've given them the basics ( 607 / 1975 etc ) & told them to do their own research , online & in the JW publications. What they choose is up to them. They know from their own experience that the air brushed "everything is wonderful" image that the WTBTS portrays is untrue.

Black Sheep

I don't think anyone has the right to force their belief or non belief on anyone...

... but I have the right to enlighten anyone who tries to force their belief or non belief on me.

still thinking

I have to agree with that Black Sheep....If they are pushing it...enlighten away....but gently gently does it or they just tune out

rebel8

Do you attempt to "free" your loved ones from the destructive WTS cult by any means necessary?

I have relatives in the cult but not loved ones. They are horrible people. So no, I did not try to rescue them from their own delusions and those who are manipulating them. I have said a few things when provoked and once when not provoked, but I haven't really put much effort into saving them.

They were physically and emotionally abusive to me quite a bit so in part I feel as though they are getting their just desserts by living a crappy, unfulfilling, fearful, sad lifestyle. I feel no obligation to save them from themselves. If they were good people, then maybe I would have a different POV.

Or is it appropriate to acknowledge that they have the right to make their OWN decision [mind control notwithstanding]?

False dichotomy.

leavingwt

Never discuss doctrine.

Ding

It is commendable that you want to help people break free, but sometimes nothing you can do will be sufficient.

In Captives of a Concept, Don Cameron quotes an elder who told him, "I would rather go to my grave being deceived than to find out the Society isn't who they say they are."

Few JWs would be that blunt -- even with themselves -- but many have such a mindset because their entire self-image and future is wrapped up in the organization.

The only way they would break free would be for them to see and then desire a better alternative; at present they can't even imagine that such a thing is possible.

In many cases, it will take a genuine divine miracle to make that happen.

You can do your best to help them get free, but it's out of your control; ultimately, if they are to break free they will have to see a credible alternative, WANT to break free, and take the necessary steps to get there.

truth_b_known

During talks that he and I have had along those lines, he essentially said that he didn't WANT to know. He said that this [JW life] is what he's done his entire life and he didn't know what sort of person he'd be without it. In a nutshell, he WANTS to be a JW and would prefer to ignore evidence that disproves WTS theory.

That is the sad, honest truth. One elder commented that if were proven that God did not exist he would still live as one of Jehovah's Witnesses.

Being one of Jehovah's Witnesses is a way of life and most who have spent the majority of their life in the organization are unable to cope with the idea of living with out it. Like many in our modern society, people want to be told what to do. Just like people who spend the years in prison, they are unable to function with freedom.

Inmates are told when to get up, what to wear, what to eat, when they can walk through a door, what they can possess. Such institutionalized people are frustrated with life outside prison walls. They literally get frustrated when ordering food at restaurants and some will wait for permission just to walk through a doorway.

The best way to help someone in the evil empire to decide to leave is to live your life the way you want to. Jehovah's Witnesses are taught that non-Witnesses are miserable and those who leave are even worse off. Prove the teaching wrong by living a long, happy life outside the organization.

undercover

Do you attempt to "free" your loved ones from the destructive WTS cult by any means necessary? Or is it appropriate to acknowledge that they have the right to make their OWN decision

Haven't read all the replies yet...but my thought on this

Personally, I respect their right to worship as they please. Living in the US, the Constitution upholds the freedom of religion so I try my best to respect their freedom. That doesn't mean that if the oppurtunity presents itself that I won't point out the inconsistencies/issues/errors of the WTS, or try to drop a hint to cause them to think for themselves.

It's a hard line to tippytoe on. It's a damaging cult to many so even though I respect their right to worship as they see fit, I can't respect all their beliefs/policies. There are times that one must take a stand against a particular doctrine, if personally affected.

But in the end, if one chooses to be a JW, then that's their right, their choice and I'm not gonna fight em on it. All I ask is that they do the same for me (which in the WT world is usually not how it works. Choose to un-believe and there's repurcussions of one sort or another).

"Freeing" those "trapped" in the Organization.

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