by punkofnice 28 Replies latest social humour
My top tip.
Jehovah's witnesses. Stay in your cult by shunning those that disagree with your leaders from Brooklyn.
or
SHOE EXPRESS customers. Throw your purchases away and wear the boxes instead. They'll be harder-wearing, more stylish and better fitting.
or
Rappers. Avoid having to say 'know what I'm sayin' all the time by actually speaking clearly in the first place.
Good tips NOT
Toothbrushes are very good for cleaning hard to reach places. But you never want to make the mistake of using a cleaning brush to brush your teeth. So what I do is tape the handle with masking tape or duct tape which means it's for cleaning. I have more tips, but I can't think of any other now.
My top tip is 25% percent, but she was REALLY special
Tip #1
Do not reply to e-mails from work when you're drunk, you might hit REPLY TO ALL.
Never stick your todger in a wasp's nest.
N.Drew - We shouldn't brush off the idea!
Elderelite - That left a tart taste in m mouth!
Nomadsoul - So the boss isn't a schnook after all?
Wobble - Why, what happens?
Ummm.....
Never argue with a guy about the size of his - uh, "little guy"...
While we're on the subject, never laugh hysterically when he tells you what he's NAMED his "little guy"...
El Zid - I hope the bloke isn't getting 'cocky' about it! Ooops!
MOTORISTS. Always have a hot pie in your hands in heavy traffic. Each time the traffic grinds to a halt, just reach for the pie. The instant you place it to your lips the traffic begins to move. This works especially well with the molten lava apple turnovers from KFC.
Never spit into the wind. Don't tug on Superman's cape. And don't mess around with Jim Slim.
Heaven - Superman exists which is more than can be said for the god of the watchtower(TM)
CONVINCE your neighbours that evolution is working backwards by not shaving for a week, walking to your car gradually more stooped each morning and wearing a monkey costume on the Friday.
