On being born in and celebrating Birthdays

by baltar447 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • cult classic
    cult classic

    Last year we gave my nephew a party for his 7th Bday. It was his first Bday party as my sister and her husband were trying to find their way out of the cult. After he opened his gifts and we sang Happy Birthday to him, he broke down in tears. He said "This is the best birthday of my life and I love my family!"

    Sometimes I get really tearful thinking of what we missed out on being born ins.

    Best Wishes on your Birthday next month Baltar - Enjoy it. You are worth it.

  • besunny
    besunny

    Happy Birthday Baltar,,,I just had my first ever birthday party for my 21yr. old daughter,,it was fun but I still felt uncomfortable singing the birthday song,,it made her so happy but she did comment "mom we could of been having this fun all along" which makes me a little sad but now I plan on having one every year for all three of my kids,,,it makes them feel special and they deserve that

  • just Ron
    just Ron

    eat your open your and enjoy your new life.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!

  • mamamo
    mamamo

    Yesterday was my oldest 19th B-day. He has always had birthday wishes and presents and parties. My son went to see his grandmothers on Saturday. One because she wanted to see him for his birthday and my mother, just to see her. She didn't remember it was his birthday. I wonder if she remembers mine. My first B-day party was the one I threw for myself when I turned 25.

    I wish you all the best on your birthday and many more!

  • Simon
    Simon

    I just got home from an early birthday meal out with our best friends.

    It does feel good having people who care and celebrate with you instead of pretending you're somehow unimportant.

  • dog is god
    dog is god

    some friends had a birthday dinner for me. I still feel uncomfortable about this. I usually don't even mention my birthday. I also don't know how to be if they want me to open presents in front of them. I doin't know how to act. Oh well.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    baltar447, awesome for you. You got your birthday back. I remember my first celebrated birthday after deciding to fade (was still going to meetings). My non-JW father and his wife sent me a package saying "Do not open until xxxx (birthdate)." My wife was afraid to ask. I think it was a sweatshirt. It didn't matter what it was- it was just great to have it back.

    In the military, it was a common phrase: "What are they going to do, take away my birthday?"

    It was a common reaction when you obeyed an order but were counseled for your attitude about it. You did nothing wrong, but they didn't like how you didn't smile doing it.

    Well, Jehovah's Witnesses did exactly what we joked about- they took away our birthdays.

    Great to have them back. As time goes on, I am enjoying anything WTS hates. I even had New Year's resolutions this year.

    So a toast with clinking glasses and a Gesundheit if you sneeze, have a happy new year and a great birthday.

  • talesin
    talesin

    It's important to celebrate your Special Day. And it's okay to break down in tears, realizing that has never before been celebrated.

    Cheers to you, special one, and remember that on that day, a precious, wonderful person entered this life.

    I celebrate you!

    xo

    tal

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    And, as if this isn't bad enough, lack of special days makes life a blur. Year after year, it is just the same old drudgery. September, you pious-sneer. When winter comes, you go to boasting sessions as usual and try as best you can to pious-sneer despite the snow and cold. (In the southern hemisphere, you battle heat instead of cold). Big and great boasting sessions, always almost identical to every other one, come during the fall and spring. You prepare to reject Jesus by pious-sneering for 3 months (you thought Christmas' long season was bad?). Then you prepare for the Grand Boasting Session (southern hemisphere people have that in lieu of the Christmas holiday and their big and great boasting sessions later in the year). Once you attend that, it is the same as every other a$$embly. The result is usually pious-sneering and crackdowns on anything that is fun.

    Never do you actually get anything fun. I can remember when I was growing up, and part of the fun was the preparation for Christmas. I used to like it when we would go Christmas shopping. Then the Christmas tree would go up--watching the lights go up, then the ornaments, then the topper. Until I became a witless, I enjoyed seeing those things lit up. In fact, that used to be one of my favorite chores of the year--rigging up Christmas tree lights and ornaments. And the presents, trips to relatives, and the like would add to the build-up. For me, it lasted until I found out what everyone else got for Christmas, and at times that would run deep into February.

    Birthdays were also special. Different years would feature different gifts. And attending others' birthday parties often left marks that would differentiate one year from others. That is how I can tell something happened in 1969 instead of 1968 or 1970, or 1973 instead of 1974 or 1972. These holidays and birthdays added character to each year, and that is important when you are growing up. It might not be a big deal if you are 25 or so, and stop doing these things--but to someone that is 5 or 6, that blah-ifies their lives when they have to stop celebrating anything.

    And that rubbish "We get toys all year long". When I was in the world, I used to get plenty of toys around Christmas, and then again near my birthday. Additionally, it was sometimes possible for me to save enough to get a toy outside these times. I don't think it's necessary to be continually getting toys because then you wouldn't be able to actually play with them--but, having things that help learn basic skills while having fun is important.

    Compare: I have been to witlesses' homes where there wasn't a toy in sight. You have children that are between 8 and 12, and there isn't a plaything anywhere. I saw one family like that--not even a radio or TV set in the place (just plenty of expensive furniture with washtowel littera-trash). I have also seen families where toys are there but very few in number and quality. Usually, this is because the parents don't think their children deserve any because they won't stay out in field circus for 8 or more hours a day without fuss. Added to this, they feel that, if children have toys, they are going to want to quit field circus earlier. With nothing fun, there is nothing to compete with the drudgery of field circus all day.

    And, if that isn't bad enough, vacation time is usurped. How often do witless children waste their vacations (which could also have added character) on field circus? Pious-sneering during school recesses. If the parents make a trip, they must find the Kingdumb Hell, attend all boasting sessions, and support their field circus. No day trips--just field circus. No watching cartoons on Saturday morning--just field circus.

    No wonder that, not only do most witlesses feel unworthy, but they lack a sense for when things happened. And no wonder they fall for the The end is nigh" rubbish even after 1975--they lack sense of differentiation between 1975 and 2014.

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