me
How many people on here have low self-esteem?
by Chemical Emotions 52 Replies latest jw friends
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N.drew
Me too.
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Lore
My self-esteem is exceptionally high relative to what a worthless person I am.
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Londo111
I don't think anybody on this board have lower self-esteem than I. I take a certain pride in the achievement. ;)
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myusername
Well, I almost started this with an apology for replying to three threads in a row, so I would say yes.
I think low self-esteem has more to do with the kind of parents that are attracted to the JW religion or choose to stay in it (if they were born in it). I have low self-esteem when it comes to real world accomplishments because being raised in the relligion is such a handicap to being a successful person.
I used to have very low self esteem when I was a young adult (early twenties), which led me to relationships with abusive, unattractive men. The way I was raised I thought I had no say in what happened to me. If I met someone really grose but they seemed familiar, I felt obligated to be in a relationship with them - especially if they used any kind of emotional blackmail.) That happened 3 times. It was such a grose experience that I'm a celibate person now.
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wha happened?
it's on going bubblegum
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caliber
thought these were some helpful points quote ...
People with a healthy level of self-esteem:[15]
* firmly believe in certain values and principles, and are ready to defend them even when finding opposition, feeling secure enough to modify them in light of experience.[16]
* are able to act according to what they think to be the best choice, trusting their own judgment, and not feeling guilty when others don't like their choice.[16]
* do not lose time worrying excessively about what happened in the past, nor about what could happen in the future. They learn from the past and plan for the future, but live in the present intensely. [16]
* fully trust in their capacity to solve problems, not hesitating after failures and difficulties. They ask others for help when they need it.[16]
* consider themselves equal in dignity to others, rather than inferior or superior, while accepting differences in certain talents, personal prestige or financial standing.[16]
* take for granted that they are an interesting and valuable person for others, at least for those with whom they have a friendship.[16]
* resist manipulation, collaborate with others only if it seems appropriate and convenient.[16]
* admit and accept different internal feelings and drives, either positive or negative, revealing those drives to others only when they choose.[16]
* are able to enjoy a great variety of activities.[16]
* are sensitive to feelings and needs of others; respect generally accepted social rules, and claim no right or desire to prosper at others' expense.[16]So if you can believe in yourself & your own judgments without total dependance & can carry on with normal activities of life
work, play and feel comfortable in your own skin you have a reasonable level of self-esteem. We would be balanced in the opinions of others..
also would seek to stay far away form extremes of "self-loathing " or becoming "self-absorbed "
Many of my self-esteem issues has stemmed from broken trust... which causes self-doubt
If we have ever felt "crushed " by another we must in some way beleive something that was said... we must look inward
and determine why it hurt us so .
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Band on the Run
My self esteem was very poor when I was in the Witnesses. The feeling, as someone mentioned, of not having any control over your life. I went from feeling no control to expecting everything should be under my control. Time helps a lot. More and more once unthinkable things happened to me. Voting, dancing, mixers, dates, and feelings of authentic community.
One problem I had was that the only positive regard I received revolved around my school grades. My self worth became too tied up in my school grades. Internal validation remains diffiicult. Time is a great healer. Older people told me this when I was young and I believed they were jerks. No one could know my true feelings. They were correct.
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caliber
"Self-esteem is the measure of how you feel about yourself at a given moment in time"
Respect is earned. Honesty is appreciated. Trust is gained. And Loyalty is returned...however
without feeling or acknowledging one's own self worth,one cannot feel too strongly either way about themself.
"Therefore , the issue seems to be whether or not we seek validation from the exterior, from others (self-esteem), or from the interior, from our inner nature (self-worth)"
http://integral-options.blogspot.com/2006/07/self-esteem-vs-self-worth.htmlWe have been taught that to love ourselves is a sin... to have 'false pride' is.. maybe... but to genuinely love and respect ourselves is the bedrock of all wonderful relationships and happiness
Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. ~Eleanor Roosevelt