I'm not surprised that kids raised in the religion who leave are simply not interested in debates or disputes over doctrine or policy. Apathy sucks more kids out of the religion than apostasy, hands down. That simple fact may irk people who continue to believe in God and the Bible.But for those who get out - and stay out - the last thing they need is a fire (as in out of the frying pan into the fire).
They are losing them...
by Aussie Oz 26 Replies latest jw friends
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Phizzy
The problem for some of those young ones is often that a lot of fear and guilt remains.
I know a lad who has been out for 15 years now, but he still will not visit sites on the Net that he considers "Apostate" and he still fears the big "A" .
His lovely wife is more open minded and has got things more or less straight, but he is still held captive in his mind.
What a shame that I cannot persuade him (yet) to spend a short time reading on JWfacts.com, he would be so much happier.
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Aussie Oz
Honestly I don't think most of the teens care about CoC, or the cult's history. I think they're just tired of it all and want to have some fun. I wasn't interested in any of that til my non-JW husband converted to Christianity. I think most teens would think it was boring, at least the teens I knew.
The problem for some of those young ones is often that a lot of fear and guilt remains.I know a lad who has been out for 15 years now, but he still will not visit sites on the Net that he considers "Apostate" and he still fears the big "A" .One thing i make a point of with my two is that it is not enought to just 'leave', they need to understand why its wrong so they dont get suck back by guilt and fear even years later.
Which i why i make a point out to mine the need to understand what is wrong with the WT even if it is boring to them, it will save them getting sucked back in later because of fear or guilt...
Oz
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diamondiiz
I know a lad who has been out for 15 years now, but he still will not visit sites on the Net that he considers "Apostate" and he still fears the big "A" .
Isn't that messed up! Afraid of dying at Armageddon but won't visit apostate sites. He's got nothing to lose if he visits an exJW site. If imaginary god is going to kill him for not following wts what worse can he possibly do to the guy if he visits jwfact.com?
That's why it's so important for believing jw at any stage in their lives (df/inactive) to learn the facts about wts, and those dating one to know the problems that may come with getting involved with jw believing in wts crap.
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steve2
I know a lad who has been out for 15 years now, but he still will not visit sites on the Net that he considers "Apostate" and he still fears the big "A" .
Isn't that messed up!
No, no no it is not - get a grip please!
It's perfectly normal for humans to continue to be influenced - and scared - by their earlier 'formative' years - there's nothing cultish, sinister or pathological about individuals struggling to come to terms with the things their parents taught them that they no longer practise.
Catholics, for example, have a reputation for experiencing high levels of persistent adulthood guilt based on what they were taught as kids. Although raised a JW, my closest childhood friend was raised in the 7th-Day Adventist church which he drifted away from in his early teens. He disclosed to me years later that he was still wracked with guilt and anxiety because of his disregard for observing the Sabbath - especially on a Saturday when he was trying to chill out.
I would never suggest that people need to get counselling to move on from the religious backgrounds that they no longer subscribe to. Yet there could be a lot of value in taking a more understanding and compassionate view of yourself as you once were and who you have now become. The last thing people need is to be told, "No wonder you are carrying around these siginificant wounds...you were raised in a cult and you need to find Jesus...or God...or the yellow brick road...or the nearest counsellor or psychologist" Rubbish.
Some principles from the Acceptance and Commitment literature can be very reassuring and normalizng of people's pasts. Let's not forget that, whilst we are worrying about all the dreads that tender young ex-JWs carry around in their poor little heads, earlier generations of (Western) humanity lived in absolute dread of roasting in hell if they deviated one iota from thundering scripture.
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ziddina
"Alcohol, sex, and parties are going to claim a lot more than 'higher education' i reckon. ..." OP
Though some of that is normal teenage curiosity and hormones, I suspect that most of the teenagers are "acting out" due to frustration...
It's too bad that those who want some REAL direction in their lives, are scared away from it by the "demons" of "ambition", "greed" - otherwise known as financial stability, "running ahead of jehovah" - otherwise known as progress, and so on...
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LongHairGal
thetrueone:
What you said is pretty much accurate as to why the JWs have a low retention of members. Nobody wants to be exploited. Not only that but the religion tries to hold people back by demonizing college and careers. I wont even go into the ridiculous doctrines, but I personally faced a dilemma because I agonized how I, as a single working woman, was going to make a "go" of it without being damaged by the religion or the users in it who thought they would target me.
But, some people are not damaged at all! I looked around me and saw all the widows and older married women with a relatively cushy life who were supported by a man, in many cases non-JW, OR if he is a brother, he made his living/pension BEFORE he came into the religion. Thus, he is not damaged by the religion's anti-college/career stand, unlike younger people. Sad to say, many of these older people are clueless about singles who have to go out and support themselves. Many of these older JWs do quite well in the JW religion and have rich social lives and a support network.
These older people are the "backbone" of many congregations and probably are the only ones who put money in the box. I consider them to be the golden goose. Once they are gone - no more golden eggs!