NewChapter... Wow! Sounds like you went to my congregation!
Animosity Toward Inactive Ones
by EmptyInside 23 Replies latest jw friends
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mercedes_29
New Chapter - I started preparing to leave when I planned to divorce my first husband. My sister friends knew the marriage was in shambles and I was very unhappy. Yet when I DA'd myself all they could say is "She started going back for to college for a grad degree. She missed meetings and grew weak." Not a single one stopped to think that I was depressed, lonely and would soon have to get a job to support myself. All they could say is how I left the "Truth" because I went back to college. They were people I knew for 20 years and they all turned their back on me and rallied around my ex. They still try to ask my mother and sister about me once in a while. I bet they are saddened to learn that I am doing fine.
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wha happened?
I'm down to two people who are still in. I had lunch with one last week. Nothing came up about the congregation, except some discussion about some people we mutually know
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DaCheech
I think they are guilty of the very thing they accuse apostates of: Pride!
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blondie
The WTS knows the right words to say and this was in a study article on 4 years ago. jws forget Jesus words a bout leaving the 99 behind to look for the one that is lost. Maybe the family feel it is only elders' responsibility...jws do that often and elders will steer them off from doing anything.
*** w08 11/15 pp. 8-12 pars. 2-18 Help Those Who Stray From the Flock ***
2 Sadly, some who seemed to appreciate Jesus’ sacrifice and made a dedication to God no longer associate with the Christian congregation. Discouragement, health problems, or other factors may have weakened their zeal and caused them to become inactive. However, only as part of God’s flock can they enjoy the serenity and happiness that David spoke of in the 23rd Psalm. For instance, he sang: “Jehovah is my Shepherd. I shall lack nothing.” (Ps. 23:1) Those in the flock of God lack nothing in a spiritual way, but that is not the happy lot of sheep who have strayed. Who can assist them? How can aid be provided? Indeed, what can be done to help them return to the flock?
Who Can Help?
3 Earnest effort is required to rescue lost sheep of God’s pasturage. (Ps. 100:3) Jesus illustrated this when he said: “If a certain man comes to have a hundred sheep and one of them gets strayed, will he not leave the ninety-nine upon the mountains and set out on a search for the one that is straying? And if he happens to find it, I certainly tell you, he rejoices more over it than over the ninety-nine that have not strayed. Likewise it is not a desirable thing with my Father who is in heaven for one of these little ones to perish.” (Matt. 18:12-14) Who can help sheeplike individuals who have strayed from the flock?
4 If Christian elders are to help sheep who have strayed, they must bear in mind that the flock of God is a congregation of people dedicated to Jehovah—yes, a precious ‘flock of God’s pasturage.’ (Ps. 79:13) Such dear sheep need tender care, and this means that loving shepherds must take a personal interest in them. Making friendly shepherding calls on them can be very effective. Loving encouragement that a shepherd gives them may build them up spiritually and increase their desire to return to the flock.—1 Cor. 8:1.
5 Shepherds of God’s flock have the duty to search for sheep who have strayed and then to try to help them. The apostle Paul reminded Christian elders from ancient Ephesus of their shepherding responsibilities when he said: “Pay attention to yourselves and to all the flock, among which the holy spirit has appointed you overseers, to shepherd the congregation of God, which he purchased with the blood of his own Son.” (Acts 20:28) Similarly, the apostle Peter gave anointed older men this exhortation: “Shepherd the flock of God in your care, not under compulsion, but willingly; neither for love of dishonest gain, but eagerly; neither as lording it over those who are God’s inheritance, but becoming examples to the flock.”—1 Pet. 5:1-3.
6 Christian shepherds need to imitate “the fine shepherd,” Jesus. (John 10:11) He was deeply concerned about God’s sheep and stressed the importance of caring for them when he told Simon Peter to ‘shepherd His little sheep.’ (Read John 21:15-17.) Especially do the sheep need such care today, for the Devil has intensified his efforts to break the integrity of those dedicated to God. Satan takes advantage of fleshly weaknesses and uses the world in an attempt to lead Jehovah’s sheep into sinful activities. (1 John 2:15-17; 5:19) Inactive ones are particularly vulnerable and therefore need assistance in order to apply the admonition to ‘walk by spirit.’ (Gal. 5:16-21, 25) Helping such sheep calls for prayerful reliance on God, the guidance of his spirit, and skillful use of his Word.—Prov. 3:5, 6; Luke 11:13; Heb. 4:12.
7 A shepherd in ancient Israel used a long curved staff, or crook, to guide his flock. As the sheep entered or left the pen, they would ‘pass under the crook’ and could thus be counted by the shepherd. (Lev. 27:32; Mic. 2:12; 7:14) A Christian shepherd likewise needs to know and keep track of the flock of God under his care. (Compare Proverbs 27:23.) Therefore, shepherding is one of the important matters discussed by the body of elders. This includes making arrangements to help sheep who have strayed. Jehovah himself said that he would search for his sheep and give them the care they needed. (Ezek. 34:11) So God is pleased when elders take similar steps in an effort to help sheep who have strayed to return to the flock.
8 When a fellow believer is physically sick, the visit of a shepherd of God’s flock can be a source of joy and encouragement. The same can be the case when a spiritually ailing sheep is given personal attention. Elders may read scriptures, review an article, discuss meeting highlights, pray with the inactive one, and so forth. They can point out that members of the congregation would be delighted to see him come back to congregation meetings. (2 Cor. 1:3-7; Jas. 5:13-15) A visit, a telephone call, or a letter can mean so much! Giving personal help to a sheep missing from the flock can also increase the joy of the compassionate Christian shepherd.
A Cooperative Effort
9 We live in busy and critical times, so it is possible that we might not notice that a fellow believer is drifting away from the congregation. (Heb. 2:1) Yet, Jehovah’s sheep are precious in his sight. Every one of them has value, as does each member, or part, of the human body. Hence, all of us need to show concern for our brothers and truly care for one another. (1 Cor. 12:25) Do you have such an attitude?
10 Although the elders take the lead in searching for and helping sheep who have strayed, concern for missing fellow believers is not limited to Christian overseers. Others can cooperate with these shepherds. We can and should offer encouragement and spiritual aid to our brothers and sisters who need help to return to the flock. How may such assistance be given?
11 In some cases, the elders may arrange for experienced Kingdom publishers to conduct a personal Bible study with inactive ones who express a desire to be given assistance. The purpose of such efforts is to rekindle in such ones “the love [they] had at first.” (Rev. 2:1, 4) These fellow believers can be built up and strengthened spiritually by considering material they missed while they were absent from the congregation.
12 If the elders invite you to study with a fellow believer needing some spiritual assistance, pray that Jehovah direct and bless your efforts. Indeed, “roll your works upon Jehovah himself and your plans will be firmly established.” (Prov. 16:3) Meditate on Bible texts and faith-strengthening points that you can use in discussions with those needing spiritual help. Reflect on the apostle Paul’s excellent example. (Read Romans 1:11, 12.) Paul longed to see Christians in Rome in order to impart some spiritual gift to them so that they might be made firm. He also looked forward to an interchange of encouragement. Should we not have that spirit when we seek to help sheep who have strayed from the flock of God?
13 During your discussions, you might ask, “How did you learn the truth?” Reminisce about past joys, encouraging the inactive one to speak about delightful experiences he has had at the meetings, in the preaching work, and at conventions. Comment on the happy times you may have had together in Jehovah’s service. Speak about your joy in drawing close to Jehovah. (Jas. 4:8) Express your gratitude for the way that God provides for us as his people—especially by giving us comfort and hope in our tribulations.—Rom. 15:4; 2 Cor. 1:3, 4.
14 Quite likely, it will be beneficial to remind the inactive one of some of the blessings he once enjoyed as a result of close association with the congregation. For instance, there was the blessing of growing in knowledge of God’s Word and purposes. (Prov. 4:18) When he ‘walked by spirit,’ it was no doubt easier for him to resist temptations to sin. (Gal. 5:22-26) In turn, a clean conscience enabled him to approach Jehovah in prayer and to enjoy ‘the peace of God that excels all thought and that guards our hearts and mental powers.’ (Phil. 4:6, 7) Keep such points in mind, show sincere interest, and by all means lovingly encourage your spiritual brother or sister to return to the flock.—Read Philippians 2:4.
15 Suppose you are an elder making a shepherding call. You might encourage an inactive married couple to reflect on the time when they first learned the truth from God’s Word. How wonderful, reasonable, satisfying, and spiritually liberating the truth was! (John 8:32) How their hearts swelled with gratitude for what they were learning about Jehovah, his love, and his splendid purposes! (Compare Luke 24:32.) Remind them of the close relationship with Jehovah and the wonderful privilege of prayer enjoyed by dedicated Christians. Earnestly encourage inactive ones to respond again to “the glorious good news of the happy God,” Jehovah.—1 Tim. 1:11.
Continue to Show Them Love
16 Do the foregoing suggestions really work? Yes. For instance, one young person who started as a Kingdom publisher when he was 12 years old became inactive at the age of 15. He later became active, however, and has been in the full-time service for over 30 years. His spiritual recovery was largely due to the assistance given him by a Christian elder. How much that spiritual help was appreciated!
17 It is love that motivates Christians to assist inactive ones to return to the congregation. Regarding his followers, Jesus said: “I am giving you a new commandment, that you love one another; just as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love among yourselves.” (John 13:34, 35) Yes, love is an identifying mark of true Christians. Should not that love be expressed for baptized Christians who may have become inactive? It certainly should! But providing needed help may call for the exercise of various godly qualities.
18 If you are to help someone who has strayed from the flock of God, what qualities might you need to display? Besides love, you may need to show compassion, kindness, mildness, and long-suffering. Depending on the circumstances, you may also need to be forgiving. Paul wrote: “Clothe yourselves with the tender affections of compassion, kindness, lowliness of mind, mildness, and long-suffering. Continue putting up with one another and forgiving one another freely if anyone has a cause for complaint against another. Even as Jehovah freely forgave you, so do you also. But, besides all these things, clothe yourselves with love, for it is a perfect bond of union.”—Col. 3:12-14.
*** km 2/07 p. 8 pars. 1-3 Do Not Forget Those Who Are Inactive ***Are you acquainted with anyone who has become inactive? Perhaps he has stopped associating with the congregation and has drifted away. You may have contacted such a person while engaging in the house-to-house ministry. We must keep in mind that the individual continues to be our spiritual brother. We want to confirm our love for him and help him to return to the congregation and to ‘the shepherd and overseer of our souls.’—1 Pet. 2:25.
2 Demonstrate Interest: A brief telephone call or visit may assure one who has become inactive that we have not forgotten him. What could we say? We may be encouraging by simply letting the person know that we were thinking of him. Keep the conversation positive and upbuilding. (Phil. 4:8) We might mention a point that we enjoyed from a recent meeting. We could also invite him to an upcoming meeting or assembly and offer to save him a seat or provide transportation.
3 A sister who had been inactive for more than 20 years was found in the territory. Although she was unwilling to accept a Bible study, the sister who found her called back, leaving the current magazines. After the district convention, the publisher shared some convention highlights with the inactive sister, and eventually she was reactivated.
*** jd chap. 11 pp. 146-147 par. 13 Jehovah Wants People to Gain Life—Do You? ***What, though, does that mean for Christians who have remained on the road to life? How can we show that we have Jehovah’s view of others? Jehovah expects us to show mercy, both to new ones and to those who may have lapsed in their service to him. God stated through Hosea what He wants from us: “In loving-kindness I have taken delight, and not in sacrifice.” Jesus Christ drew on those words and expressed the thought this way: “Go, then, and learn what this means, ‘I want mercy, and not sacrifice.’” (Hosea 6:6; Matthew 9:13) Our demonstrating such mercy is critical to maintaining our own relationship with God. Note how the apostle Paul linked being forgiving with imitating God: “Become kind to one another, tenderly compassionate, freely forgiving one another just as God also by Christ freely forgave you. Therefore, become imitators of God, as beloved children, and go on walking in love.” (Ephesians 4:32–5:2) How are you doing as to imitating God in this respect?
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Phizzy
How many get such loving help ? Not that I wanted it, but I was decades in the religion, went inactive, got one visit, he said he would come back, never did.
The next I got was the two Elder visit trying to catch me out and DF me. This was just over six months after I stopped going to meetings.
How many on here have had similar treatment ?
Loving shepherds ? The average Elder does not know what that means, maybe if they actually put in to practice what Blondie has quoted from their Lit. above, and did it early, they might recapture a few.
They do us a favour by their laziness and lack of love, it gives us time to find TTATT !
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blondie
Yes, phizzy, they don't do it, the WTS often speaks out of both sides of their mouth. Actions speak louder than words, right. So the WTS knows what is right to do but they don't do it, which is a sin per the bible, even theirs.
(James 4:17) 17 Therefore, if one knows how to do what is right and yet does not do it, it is a sin for him.
They even know this and illustrate it, but do not do it.
*** w80 11/1 p. 6 Is It True that “All Have Sinned”? ***
This same disciple cited another way that we can sin. He said: “If one knows how to do what is right and yet does not do it, it is a sin for him.” (Jas. 4:17) How could this be? Well, imagine a man walking along the sidewalk when suddenly a child dashes out of a garden in front of him and onto the busy street. What if the man is in a position to save the child from being run over but just ignores him and walks past. True, he does not do anything wrong. But the fact that he fails to do something to help the child would be a sin for him. How many times have all of us failed to act in a really loving way toward our fellow humans, or toward God? Each time we fail, it is a sin.
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Chariklo
Much of the above is very scary stuff. Even I am getting the "missing you so much" phone calls, including tears from one loving sister!
I read through the w 08 article above with growing horror and distaste. From where I am, 6 weeks and haven't been within sight of the KH, haven't read a WT, haven't read a day text, not one, haven't picked up the phone to listen in, I'm getting stronger every day.
But they damaged me, there is no doubt. I've just had a day out with one of my daughters...it's been a lovely sunny Sunday, all day. We've been discussing family things for Easter, and I was talking about Easter eggs for grandchildren, realising that even now I am wary of going to the usual supermarket to buy them because "they'll" see me.
Pathetic! Why should I care?
My daughter, with an evil grin, said "Come to the Dark Side! We have Easter eggs!"
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NewChapter
NewChapter... Wow! Sounds like you went to my congregation!
That is because they dwell in christian unity my friend. Gossip is like lifeblood to them. And having the handy, dandy excuse of being concerned, allows them to really explore the issue---to remember long forgotten signs---to talk about those things that were confidential. They have to solve the puzzle you see, so that they can help. Sister Trusted Friend no longer has to keep a secret, because maybe that holds the key! And finally, FINALLY, she has reason to spill her guts without guilt. Then they go for coffee and donuts and complain they can't lose weight.
NC
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ex360shipper
They are mad that you found the loophole and don't appear to feel guilty about it.