Thank you all for your outpouring of empathy. I don't know how I am going to get through this, but your suggestion, Barbara, is one that is comforting to me. He was a good man who brought his mother and others happiness.
I got some xanax from the doctor, but I hesitate to take it. I feel that I owe my son to experience this pain and not to shrink from its intensity.
James_Woods and others, what you say is food for thought. I appreciate your analytical perspective on the events.