Recently, when saying goodbye to my grandmother, who I only see a few times a year, she started tearing and said something that made me very sad. She said she had to tell me that the door to Jehovah's kingdom is closing at any moment now, and that if I didn't do anything now, it would be to late. To her, she is facing an eternity without her grandchildren and it makes her very sad. I don't have the heart to tell her that I do not share her beliefs, and that I believe the world will go on as usual. All I am able to do is nodding and silently saying yes. How can I be able to stand up and say that I disagree? And how will she react, as she is a very devout witness?
It makes me sad.
by Matsimus 10 Replies latest jw experiences
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Chariklo
I think you are doing the right thing, Matsimus. With elderly people, elderly devout Witnesses, they almost certainly can't cope with the thought that the religion to which they have devoted their life is false.
I have an elderly friend, a sister with serious health problems. She's in her mid-80's, and has been a JW for well over half a century. She is very troubled that I am not going to the KH any more, and constantly tries her best to get me to see it more positively. She says things like "I'm so glad to be safe unf=der Jehovah's umbrella" and "I'm so glad I can prove my religion from the Bible".
I haven't the heart to confront her with uncomfortable facts. Her own family is split and includes some disfellowshipped grandchildren, yet she remains steadfast. She is a very dear friend. I love her to bits, and I couldn't possibly cauuse her distress.
So sometimes the most I say is "you know I don't see it like that don't you?". She can cope with that much, but no more.
It sounds to me as though your grandmother is like that, and I am certain that you're doing the right and loving thing.
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Billy the Ex-Bethelite
Grandmother, I'm sorry that what you've been taught makes you feel so sad and lonely. Instead, I prefer the teaching that God is love, and love casts fear outside. God isn't so shallow as to judge people by church membership, he can reads hearts and is looking for the good in individuals. Jesus individually selects the sheep from the goats. He doesn't say that they're already divided by church membership.
Grandmother, I suppose Watchtower has promised you that after rocks fall from the sky and smash our brains out, you can have a new family of children and grandchildren. And you'd better find that comforting or Watchtower will tell you that those rocks will smash your brains out if you dare to question or doubt what Watchtower prints as "current truth." God isn't that superficial and insecure.
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jamiebowers
My response would be, "Grandma, instead of worrying so much, why not thank Jehovah that you haven't been appointed judge and that Jehovah reads hearts."
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Morbidzbaby
It's a very difficult thing because they truly BELIEVE in this crap. My own grandmother (whom I despised) was in her hospital bed dying and every time she would "come to" for a minute, she'd say "Am I in Paradise?? Is this the Paradise? Did I make it?".
My mom isn't elderly (yet...closing in on it, though), but I know if I tried my hardest to get her to see the truth, she'd lose her ever-lovin' mind. She literally can't handle the truth. I do believe she'd crack and lose it. So I let it be.
I don't know exactly what you believe, but I know when that time comes for me to say goodbye to my parents, I'll simply say "See you around" or "I'll see you again". In their mind, this comforts them because they think that I might just go back to the JW's and they'll see me in their "Paradise". In my own mind, it simply means "I'll see you on the other side" or "We will meet again" (I believe in reincarnation...the closest people to us in this life have always been with us in one form or another).
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Flossycat
I think JamieB has put it so suscinctly.
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Disillusioned Lost-Lamb
When an elderly witless is facing their end in "this system" it scares them because they thought, and were always taught, that they would see the big A. I think many are having (secret) doubts and are just looking for affirmation to the beliefs they held so dear for so long.
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redvip2000
I go through somewhat the same thing with my mother. She dedicate her entire life to the cult and although i've spoken to her about some of the fallacies within the WT, so is not able to make sense of them. Instead simply reverts back to the "end is coming".
Now i simply nod and tell her i am trying to please God as well. I honestly i think that at this point, she might as well spend the rest of her days thinking that she dedicated herself to something positive, even if that is not true.
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wha happened?
I thinks it's criminal that your Grandmother wakes up everyday wondering if today is the day, where it becomes too late. This is how this frail woman is spending her last days.
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thetrueone
She said she had to tell me that the door to Jehovah's kingdom is closing at any moment now.
Too bad you couldn't convince her that this statement by the WTS. has been used for over century as
a marketing scam to support the proliferation of the WTS own published works.
Hard to convince some old timers that they've been scammed by a religion that says it was the only one chosen by god
That old conniving and deceiving devil the Watchtower Corporation.