Jesus Christ mate.
Don't leave your kids with members of any cult until they are cult proof. These pricks ar dangerous, family, or not.
My mother is trying to indoctrinate my 4 year old and I do not know what to do
by jwfacts 67 Replies latest jw experiences
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lisaBObeesa
I agree with much of what has already been said about letting grandma know the rules and so on.
I would also put out there that if a 4 year old gets the idea that dad is angry (or even just a little upset) with grandma because of something the 4 year old said that grandma said about Jehovah, the 4 year old may not tell dad anything else that grandma says about Jehovah. Kids are like that...protective, not wanting to get people in trouble...they even protect people who abuse them, so I would think it would be very natural for a 4 year old to try to protect grandma. Just something to keep in mind. (and if worst comes to absolute worst and you have to cut grandma off, there is a good chance the child will think its his fault if things aren't handled very carefully)
Also, I like the idea of having the child ask questions of grandma, but 4 is a little young for encouraging that, imo. I think that would be better left for when he is in grade school. And it will probably come naturally to him by then since he will be raised to ask questions and be a critical thinker...
I don't think we really have much to worry about. Children taught to ask questions and think logically will not become indoctrinated unless they are not exposed to anything else but the brainwashing.
Yes, that.
Don't panic.
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outsmartthesystem
Your message is exactly what I would send. But don't expect her to pay attention to it. I am sure she loves you but she thinks your mind is controlled by Satan and it is her DUTY to try to save her grandson from you. She may stop preaching to him for a while....but it will pick back up again. She will try to be more discreet.....but it will pick back up again. She will lie. She will deceive. But to her....it isn't really a lie since you are standing in teh way of her "teaching" your son.
She will attempt to use some sort of "theocratic warfare"
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flipper
JW FACTS- I don't know your personal history entirely ( at least about your wife and your relationship ) I know you run a website a great one , and wrote Bethel for getting your records back - however - this point of getting your wife to be a support to you in my opinion is the most important part of the puzzle here. Are you able to share a little background with us about your wife ? Was she ever a Witness ? Is that the reason she's letting your mom Witness to your child ? Is she still a JW ? Or was she just never a JW and doesn't realize how dangerous a cult the Jehovah's Witnesses are ?
Until you are able to convince your wife that it's dangerous for your mom to be pushing JW teachings into your child's mind and get her ( your wife ) on the same page as you - you may be fighting an uphill battle here. Instead of plugging up one hole in a boat, you're having to plug up the mother hole and the wife hole in the boat. You get my drift ? Are you still living with your wife ? Still married ? If you are then it's imperative that you and her see eye to eye on what goes into your little one's head. Otherwise if your wife is not your ally - all the convincing in the world won't keep your mother superior JW mom from jumping the gun to seek your wife as an accomplice to indoctrinate your child. Just my 2 cents and how I'm seeing this after reading the previous posts. Good luck ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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outsmartthesystem
"Steve, great idea. If I ask Mum how she would feel if I started trying to contact my JW neice and nephew to teach them my beliefs, she may appreciate the depth of emotion that raises. "
Paul, I wish that was the case and I hope you succeed. But I fear that she will miss the point. I tried a similar message to my wife. My wife wonders why I don't want to go to "congregation" get-togethers. I explained it like this: "If you used to be a Pentecostal...and then you spent 2 years investigating your religion only to discover that it too is filled with falsehoods....would you want to go hang out with a bunch of Pentecostals that will be speaking about their latest missionary trip and how God is blessing them?" Naturally she didn't see the connection because THEY (Pentecostals) are false religion.....but the witnesses have the TRUE religion.
I fear that your mom will completely miss the point. She will only look at it through her rose colored glasses. If you tried to contact your JW neice to teach your beliefs....that would be a tragedy because YOU HAVE LEFT JEHOVAH. She hasn't left Jehovah....so to her....her situation is different. She is right and you are wrong. Therefore there is nothing that should stand in the way of her teaching the right thing to your son. Jehovah's Witnesses siimply cannot reason when the fact that they might be wrong is an option.
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AnnOMaly
I think this whole thing is being blown up out of proportion. Kids are told all sorts of things when they're little - Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, made up stories about whatever (how Uncle Harry is related to Dracula because he has fangs) - anything to create some awe and mystery. They believe this stuff for a while and repeat it but eventually they start to realise that something's off and they discard those stories. Now one may put God into the same category or one may not, depending on one's views.
The point is, there comes a time - even while still quite young - when the child will question and/or discard what s/he previously believed. It is the parents who mold the child and are his/her main influence at home, despite what other family members and friends say. All I would say is, 'Yeah, that's Grandma's belief. People have different ways of explaining the universe and our world [pick two simple examples].' Really, don't make a big deal out of it. The child will pick up on the negative vibes - not good. Of course, if grandma is boring the pants off the poor little kid and won't talk about anything else, then she needs to be told to tone it down or give the subject a rest.
Anyway, that's my $0.02.
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mrsjones5
I agree with Ann. My grandparents (especially my grandfather) didn't like my father. Took ever opportunity to tell us kids how much they didn't like my dad and why. When we spent the summer with my grandparents, Grandpa would sit all four of us on the divan and proceed to lecture us on why my dad and his family was no good. Didn't sway us a bit. We still loved and adored our father.
Another example: I watched a night news program about a little boy who was taken away by his mother to Brazil when he was 3 years old and the father fought to bring him back. The boy, who is eleven now, is now back with his father in the states. The boy held on to the fact that he loved his dad and should be with his dad dispite what his Brazilian family wants.
Jw, you have a trump card, you're the dad who loves his son very much and your boy loves you too. You have more of an influence on your boy than your MIL could ever have. Don't forget that.
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oldlightnewshite
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