After I got home from work I looked in my mailbox and lo and behold what do I find.......the very last magazine from the now discontinued subscription of the Awake and WT. NO more will these magazines stack up on our kitchen table unread by my wife who claims to believe but almost never go to meetings. No more will these magazines stack up on the bottom of the bookcase in our study. No more will I have to box up these magazines that my wife refuses to throw away for some WT induced guilt trip reason that even she can't explain.
She hasn't been to a meeting in awhile now and she says it's because she's lonely there with no one to talk to since I wont go with her. Lonely in a place that profess to have so much love for one another? She fails to realize that she's been marked by that congregation as bad association since she's not regular in either meetings or field service. And I'm not falling for the guilt trip again. That's how I was suckered into being a JW in the beginning. I refuse to let anyone, especially any religious organization quasi or otherwise, have that much control over my life...ever again. I lost about three valuable years of my life to that nonsense before I realized that they were full of crap.
I wish that she'd just admit to herself that the pipedream perpetrated by the WTBTS of living in paradise soon, always soon, always just around the corner, if only you'd place that one extra magazine, or spent that extra hour in field service, has lost it's luster even for her. It breaks my heart to see her struggling with her conscience with even the most mundane decisions she have to make, always torn between what she really wants to do and what the Society would have her do.
But I'll gently and patiently keep trying to free her mind......cause I do love her.......