by Beans 14 Replies latest jw friends
Would you help a fellow EXJW out in times of need? If sisterXXX had needs and approached you for help in a certain area would you? If a current JW wanted your help supporting him or her in front of a judicial/investigative committee would you?
Would you need to know them well for your support?Can you remember back how much it was emphasized about helping each other was encouraged in the congregation?Do you think that this made you a better person or honestly a true individual?
Beans
BEANS MY DEAR FRIEND I KNOW IF AN EX JW WAS IN NEED OF HELP AND IF IT WAS WITHIN MY POWER TO HELP THEM I WOULD. AND WHAT KIND OF NEEDS DOES SISTER XXX HAVE HUMMMM, AND BY GOLLY GEE WHIZ IF A WITNESS NEEDED ME TO HELP THEN ON A JUDICIAL MATTER I WOULD SAY GET LOST. THEY WOULD NEVER ASK A DISFELLOWSHIPPED PERSON FOR ASSISTANCE.
Beans writes:
Would you help a fellow EXJW out in times of need? If sisterXXX had needs and approached you for help in a certain area would you? If a current JW wanted your help supporting him or her in front of a judicial/investigative committee would you?Would you need to know them well for your support?Can you remember back how much it was emphasized about helping each other was encouraged in the congregation?Do you think that this made you a better person or honestly a true individual?
Maybe it's just me, but a person's religious beliefs aren't important when I'm considering whether or not to help them. Of course, it depends on the nature of the assistance required (do they want me to pick up a loaf of bread at the supermarket? or do they want me to co-sign a car loan? or do they want me to provide an alibi as to their whereabouts when they were committing a crime?)
In cases of genuine need, whenever possible, I usually help. In most cases, people ask me for medical information; and if I don't have the answer off the top of my head, I don't mind spending some time checking my resources for them. In cases of financial assistance, I'll help if I'm able to. I've also given supportive counselling when friends are having difficult times emotionally, helping them to "re-frame" situations so that they feel empowered instead of overwhelmed.
If a JW wanted my advice on the premise that they were about to face a JC, it would depend on what the accusations were, and whether I felt knowledgable enough to offer the kind of information they needed. I'd probably refer someone to this and other sites and let the person glean whatever information they needed. As a measure of self-preservation (since I'm neither DF'd or DA'd) I would insist on confidentiality, and if they felt unable to guarantee it, I would probably just refer someone to the sites and that's all.
Love, Scully
I WASN'T FINISHED MY RESPONSE PC HAD A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN,
OKAY I DON'T THINK YOU NEED TO KNOW THE PERSON WELL ENOUGH TO HELP THEM OR SUPPORT THEM I MEAN IF I WERE TO ASK YOU FOR SUPPORT OR HELP WOULD YOU HELP ME, KNOWING THAT WE HAVE ONLY MET ONCE AND READ EACH OTHERS POSTING? I FEEL I COULD SAY YES. AND VICE VERSA.
EVERYONE OF US NEEDS TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT OURSELF SO GIVING AND ENCOURAGEMENT WOULD MAKE ME FEEL BETTER. I DID IT AS A JW AND NOW THAT I AM NOT I STILL MAINTAIN I AM THE SAME PERSON SO IF YOU NEED BUDDY I AM HERE AND FOR ANYONE ELSE WHO NEEDS ME I AM HERE, I LOVE ALL OF YOU HONESTLY, BUT LET ME FIND OUT THAT A PERSON IS A PRETENDER WELL YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO KNOW HOW I WOULD DEAL WITH A PERSON LIKE THAT. I FEEL I AM A GOOD JUDGE OF CHARACTER AND I GO WITH MY GUT INSTICT.
Beans
On here a lot of ExJw help other ExJw with advice..a listening ear..offering a shoulder etc etc.
I don't always think it is one's previous JW training that inspires someone to reach out and offer advice or help. I remember all too well the generosity of the JW members toward one another...the love and support in times of need. I especially remember the love and support at funerals and when a JW member is grieving...such a lot of kindness and love would be expressed.
BUT...this expression of love was conditional...only for those related in the faith. It is rarely expressed or shared with people like neigbhours or 'worldly' nobodies.
Since I have been out of the borg...I have seen just as much love and support expressed amongst worldly people...people who have NEVER had the training to show love to one another...it is just automatic. When my father died I was shown more kindness and love and support by my neighbours (worldly) then I did from my JW family members.
As for offering support and help to other ex jws....i think that goes without saying. If a JW wanted help in front of a judicial committee? I would have to say that I would offer them my opinion on the matter...and my opinion would be to let a judicial DF them...and to pick up ones petticotes and to boldly move on and not look back!
Beck
Beans,
Excuse me? You said we were encouraged to help others in the congregation? That wasn't my experience, or the experience of many who post here. I have read many stories here where little or no help was given to those in need.
Now, I have been here for a year and a half and in that time I have helped 5 people I have never met, and one person I have met. When I was a Witness, I helped one, so my track record is better here.
I DO NOT PROMISE ANYTHING UNLESS I KNOW WHAT THE PERSON IS IN NEED OF--WE ALL NEED HELP AT TIMES __ BUT KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS AND I WILL KEEP U IN MINE!!! QUEENIE and family !!! ONE DAY AT A TimE folks PEACE !!!!!
Helping others regardless of religious affiliation is exactly how I live. I doubt in my case that this was taught to me by the borg. In fact the opposite they tried to take that out of me and only programmed what they considered help. I just posted in another thread how when my friend 9 an active sister in the cong) was dying of cancer I was counseled against spending so much time taking care of her. In the eyes of the elder my time would be better spent going door to door. So much for loving your spiritual family. I chose to ignore the elders and listen to my heart and conscience.
If someone really needs help (and aren't just out to use me) then I am there
Rejoice in the healing and not in the pain.
Rejoice in the challenge overcome and not in the past hurts.
Rejoice in the present - full of love and joy.
Rejoice in the future for it is filled with new horizons yet to be explored. - Lee Marsh 2002
Don't take offense to this -- but TRYING TO READ SOMETHING IN ALL CAPS is not eye candy and is quite distracting
Didn't disTRACT me at all.
Please, continue to post/ express in the manner YOU are comfortable with. If you choose to turn the caplox on and leave it on, that's cool with me. The message far outweighs any of that.
sKally, TEDDY CAN KISS MY ASS KLASS
If man was supposedly created in gods image, then.....holy krap...we're all doomed.-sKallyWagger
