Is this it??? JWD Armageddon?????

by ashitaka 24 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  ashitaka

  And another.....funny stuff....no flames to put out......see how nice it is, guys?

  Only a General in the Marine Corps would have the gonads to use
  >>>this line:
  >>>
  >>>This is one of the best comeback lines of all time. It is a
  >>>portion of a
  >>>National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a female broadcaster
  >>>and US
  >>>Marine Corps General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout
  >>>Troop
  >>>visiting his military installation.
  >>>
  >>>FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you
  >>>going to teach
  >>>these young boys when they visit your base?
  >>>
  >>>GENERAL REINWALD: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing,
  >>>archery, and
  >>>shooting.
  >>>
  >>>FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't
  >>>it?
  >>>
  >>>GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised
  >>>on the
  >>>rifle range.
  >>>
  >>>FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly
  >>>dangerous
  >>>activity to be teaching children?
  >>>
  >>>GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see how. We will be teaching them
  >>>proper rifle
  >>>discipline before they even touch a firearm.
  >>>
  >>>FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent
  >>>killers.
  >>>
  >>>GENERAL REINWALD: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but
  >>>you're not
  >>>one, are you?
  >>>
  >>>The radio went silent and the interview ended
  >>>
  >>>
• 

  Solace

  ashitaka:
  I agree.
  Its not entertaining to read degrading comments or attacks on someone as a person. Its like, people post them because they cant think of anything else to say. Im not perfect but we could have a little less name calling.
  Debates can be helpful if they deal with important issues, as long as we stick to the issue.
• 

  Prisca

  Trivia for the day.

  1. Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.

  2. It is impossible to lick your elbow.

  3. A crocodile can't stick its tongue out.
  4. A shrimp's heart is in their head.
  5. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze,
  your heart stops for a mili-second.
  6. In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no
  one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in
  the sand(or attempted to do so).
  7. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.
  8. A pregnant goldfish is called a twit
  9. Between 1937 and 1945 Heinz produced a version of Alphabet
  Spaghetti especially for the German market that consisted solely
  of
  little pasta
  swastikas.
  10. By law, every child in Belgium must take harmonica lessons at
  Primary school.
  11. On average, a human being will have sex more than 3,000 times and spend two weeks kissing in their lifetime.
  12. More than 50% of the people in the world have never made or recieved a telephone call.
  13. Rats and horses can't vomit.
  14. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.
  15. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head
  or neck and die. If you keep your eyes open by force, they will pop out.
  16. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.
  17. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.
  18. If the government has no knowledge of aliens, then why does Title 14,Section 1211 of the Code of Federal Regulations, implemented on July 16, 1969, make it illegal for U.S. citizens to have any contact with extraterrestrials or their vehicles?
  19. In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.
  20. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
• 

  ashitaka

  One Liners for Women
  I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.

  A hard-on does not count as personal growth.

  This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

  If I throw a stick, will you leave?

  Do I look like a f***ing people person?

  I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

  Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

  If I want to hear the patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.

  Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?

  See no evil, hear no evil, and date no evil.

  Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

  What ever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

  I am doing my best to imagine you with a personality.

  Okay, okay I take it back. Un-Fuck you!

  Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

  And which dwarf are you?

  How do I set a laser printer to stun?

  It's not the size that counts, it's the, umm... actually it is the size.
• 

  think41self

  Hey, I'll join in the fun
  *NEW* --> KUNG-FU KITTY <-- Really Funny Video
  http://www.madblast.com/view.cfm?type=Video&display=1011

  think41self

  If I'd known I was going to live this long, I'd have taken better care of myself!
• 

  teejay

  I will say this though, I was able to talk to one person who did not get along with me in private email. Teejay and I reached an understanding and our "petty war" no longer disrupts this DB.

  Hi, Wendy!
• 

  TR

  CHRIST 'O MIKEY! Look at those thighs on Hillary!

  TR

  I hold it to be the inalienable right of anybody to go to hell in his own way.
  --Robert Frost, 1935
• 

  25ashitaka25

  TR,

  {scottish accent}

  Like stout tree-trunks, they are!!!!

  AH, to have a stumpy woman and a porter!!!

  ashi
• 

  lauralisa

  Ashi, you are cool. I am reading this thread, pausing between tokes, and this is playing in the background, this awesome ani defranco song. This is for you:

  Freakshow

  Life in the circus ain't easy
  but the folks on the outside don't know
  the tent goes up and the tent comes down
  and all that they see is the show
  and the ladies on the horses look so pretty
  and the lions are lookin real mad
  and some of the clowns are happy
  and some of the clowns are sad

  but underneath
  there's another expression
  that the makeup isn't making
  life under the big top

  it's about freedom
  it's about faking
  there's an art to the laughter
  there's a science
  and there's a lot of love
  and compliance

  welcome to the freakshow
  here we go...

  we live to hear the slack-jawed gasping
  we live under a halo of held breath
  and when the children raise up a giant shield
  of laughter, it's like they're fending off death
  and we can make something bigger
  than any one of us alone
  and then the clowns will take off their makeup
  and the people will go home

  but life on the outside ain't easy
  no sequins, no elephants
  no parading around
  yeah the tent goes up
  and the tent comes down
  and they're stuck in this fucking town

  you need a lot of love and compliance...

  welcome to the freakshow
  here we go......

  These weird things will pass, and another amazing humanoid event will take place, and we'll participate to some degree, or we won't... we'll learn something though, whether we want to or not.

  This week I have caught myself wondering what it would be like to have my well-seasoned 44 year old mind trapped in the body of a 23 year old..... wishing I had access to a place like this when I was so young. I'd be like four times as wise, perhaps. That would rock.

  lauralisa.
• 

  mommy

  LOL this has turned out to be a GREAT thread
  Tracy I have been searching EVERYWHERE for a way to post that cat fight! I have it on my hard drive and could not figure out how to post it. LOL I love it, I often watch it just so I can laugh. thanks

  Teejay Peace my friend.

  TR hehe You know I never noticed that!

  Laura Feigning suprise at you toking...lol I was listening to tunes too. My anthem of late Change your mind by Sister Hazel

  Change Your Mind

  Hey, Hey
  Did you ever think
  There might be another way
  To just feel better,
  Just feel better about today

  Oh no-
  If you never want to have
  To turn and go away
  You might feel better,
  Might feel better if you stay

  Pre-chorus
  Yeah yeah
  I bet you haven't heard
  A word I've said
  Yeah yeah
  If you've had enough
  Of all your tryin'
  Just give up
  The state of mind you're in…

  Chorus If you want to be somebody else,
  If you're tired of fighting battles with yourself
  If you want to be somebody else
  Change your mind...

  Hey hey-
  Have you ever danced in the rain
  Or thanked the sun
  Just for shining- just for shining
  Or the sea?
  Oh no- take it all in
  The world's a show
  And yeah, you look much better,
  Look much better when you glow

  Pre-chorus/chorus

  Hey hey-
  what ya say
  We both go and seize the day
  'cause what's your hurry
  what's your hurry anyway