by SethBridge 19 Replies latest social family
sB, sounds like what my mother did when I told her I was a witch. She quoted scriptures and WT article, blah blah blah. this forum is my therapy but of course, if you see the need to seek professional help, please do so. The last article that said the guy was guy but he said in truth he was a pervert...I just can't believe this dribble. Gay doesn't equal pervert. Child molesters = pervert. People who abuse animals = pervert.
That pic of the exJW gays is so awesome *sends everyone a big hug*
That letter is so gay.
My thought while scanning the letter was to make up an urban myth about word patterns in jw magazines containing secret coded messages about the surge of secret Bethel homosexual networks organizing their effort to convert the Friends.
Something like their morbid fear of the backwards masking with demonic messages.
muahahahaha
When I was a bartender in Wash. D.C., I had this regular customer, a black guy, who was the biggest bigot at my bar. He was eager to voice his abhorrence... FOR BLACK PEOPLE. He hated his own skin and would get visibly angry if anyone tried to remind him that he was black. I'm not joking. It was weird.
I remembered thinking then, during my disfellowshipped years (later reinstated/later disassociated) that this must be the same psychological phenomenon that caused religious gays and lesbians to speak out so venomously against their fellow GLBTs.
I guess the mind can be tweaked into just about anything.
Hey Timothy! Nice to see you pop in.
TimothyT: How are you anyway Jason?
Well, I'll tell you. The dishwasher started leaking last night, the cat ripped my lip open with his claw, it's too stinking hot in South Carolina, USA, men are pigs, love is dead, nobody cares, I'm bitter, jaded cynical and deep in denial.....
... but it occurs to me that's probably not what you meant when you asked, is it? Okay, nevermind.
I'm doing fine, little buddy. How are you?
My friend, SethBridge, thank you for writing and joining our community. You will meet people here who have walked a mile in your shoes and others who, while they may not be gay want to be your friend. I won't go into my experience as a gay Witness here but am sending you a PM so that we can continue to talk "backstage" if you like. I did not read the entire text of your mother's letter because I've heard it all before. When I confronted my judicial committee about the WTS teachings on homosexuality, I told them that the Society's literature was "inadequate, incomplete and insufficient". Furthermore, it is riddled with lies, misconceptions, myths and fairy-tales. The experiences related about men who married, fathered children, and then "lived happily ever after" were the worst for me to read because they were absolutely false.
To make a long story short, I finally left the organization and have not looked back. Yes, there are some people I left behind whom I really love but for now there can be no association with them due to their own choice in the matter. But I have a much better life now than I did as a Witness--and so will you. That better life will begin when you start loving yourself, something Jesus said was a command. Loving yourself will start healing the wounds this cult has inflicted on you and will make you a better person. Then fully embrace your identity. That doesn't mean that the entire sum of your existence is wrapped up in being a gay man. Being gay is part of who you are, not completely who you are. You have other gifts and abilities. Discover them, learn to use and enjoy them, and put them at the service of others.
Today is the first day of the rest of your life. And since you are young, you have more years ahead of you than you have behind you. Enjoy them to the full and you will now that you have quit this execrable cult and embraced yourself. By the way, I'm glad to see both irondork and TimothyT participate in this thread. Keep up the good work, fellas!
Quendi
Billy - Sad how we have all been put into this this same situation by a cult, but the best part is we have eacother to use our critical thinking skills. I do feel bad for my family even the most liberal ones. They are even more confused. Thanks for the input :)
Diest - I have definitely noticed how hard it is for people outside of the situation and even for people pretty close to the situation to understand what I'm going through. Not that I would expect that of them.
Irondork - Thanks for sending me some info. I have been often thinking about reading some of those books. After the year I've been through and the research I have done, I really am just holding on even the last bit of belief that I have in god. And by no means do I believe in any of the nonsense the JWs spew. Would these books still help?
Miles3 - Have you ever seen the documentary "Because The Bible Tells Me So"? It was one of the best documentaries I have ever seen. It's a must watch. They mention your viewpoint about how most religios folk and even most people in general cant separate sex from sexual orientation. It really isn't about sex in my opinion.
Cantleave - Thanks for sharing that awesome pic!
Queenwitch - your story sounds fascinating! Is it posted somewhere?
Thank you all so much for your input! I know that there was a lot of info in there but I appreciate your take on the matter.
obviously a JW
takes the say in a thousand words what should be said in a hundred.
the letter is a rant. It goes from one thought to another with scant direction
What was she on about anyway?
OMG thanks for bring up that point Zeb. So at one point she added the part about studdering. This pissed me off almost more than anything. One of my younger cousins, I think he's about 12 now, has fought with his speech impediment his entire life! The two of us are very alike in our personalities, and we all feel horrible about it because he has not been able to make any progress at all. At one point my mom decided she would start singing her answers at the meeting because appearantly there have been studies showing that singing helps people who studder. So this was an obvious manipulation for her to add this in. So gross.
Seth: So this was an obvious manipulation for her to add this in. So gross.
When there is no legitimate foundation under a person's argument, the only tool they can turn to is manipulation in order to win over another's mind. That principle pretty much sums up your mother's letter.
But it's not necessarily your mother's fault either. This manipulation technique imployed by the WTS is the only "art of teaching" your mother has ever known (speculating she has been a JW most her life). Likely, it has been the same with you. I grew up trapped inside that kind of sideways reasoning. It used to make perfect sense to me.
QUENDI has a very interesting story about his exit from the cult and how he was able to dissect the literature. I never had that skill. I hope he shares that with you. Had it not been for the ill treatment from others, I might not have awakened to the reality of my situation.
Realizing the manipulation used to keep you trapped in JW think is an essential step, but it's only one of the first steps. That's why I was suggesting that you learn as much as possible about the organization, how it works, thinks, operates, and yes, even lies. As you learn more, the grip they had on your mind, and might even still have to some degree, will melt away as they become more and more exposed for the frauds they are. Your self confidence will begin building a foundation - something I was desperately lacking my whole life and never knew it. You will find a sense of legitimacy when you realize God in fact does NOT hate fags. When you realize how wrong the WTS has been on so many other topics over the course of so many years, the spit and venom they have to spew about your filthy faggot butt will be meaningless and powerless.
It's one thing to battle those concepts with other people. It's quite another to battle them inside your own mind, having absorbed and internalized their homophobia your whole life. Completely breaking your mind free from their destructive anti-gay dogma will refresh you in ways you can't imagine. The best part is, it will free you to realize God does value you in exactly the way he designed you, making you more eager to draw close to him and search him out.
I think I'm safe in saying most people on this forum would recommend you first read Crisis of Conscience by Raymond Franz. All of these books are available at amazon.com.
My next suggestion would be to read Homosexianity by Rommell D. Weekly. This author is a bit of a drama queen and I think he's kind of full of himself. But his arguments on the topic are sound and he stays true to the bible. He does not try to discredit the validity of the scriptures or manipulate them to make his point, but rather, embraces them.
Also, In Search of Christian Freedom by Raymond Franz. A monster read. He could have used an editor. Kinda wordy, this one. But when you are finished, you will have a clear understanding of things.
Don't be overwhelmed by all of it. Just take your time and enjoy the process. It'll be life-changing for you.
Also, there is a gay christian forum full of whackos and freaks just like this one that I occasionally participate in. If you can stomach sifting through prayer requests for people who stubbed their toe or can't find a good parking spot, there is a lot of good information on that site. A good place to start would be to read the two essays. You'll see them when you get there.
