by cedars 66 Replies latest jw friends
biometrics
Maybe someone could make a parody with all the failed predictions rather than number of magazines.
That's a great idea! Unfortunately it can't be me because I've already gained membership to the rather exclusive "copyright violators of the Watchtower" club. I'd rather not tempt fate and end up getting booted off YouTube for parodying them again.
Cedars
they can embed it, but they can always watch the videos on youtube and if that happens...look out for an avalanche of satanism!
there's always the question of what vids are recommended once the original video finishes. that could be pretty devastating too.
imagine watching sparlock only to accidentally click on a recorded jc, or someone's video about why they left...and all on the society's website no less!
"No Other Magazine Comes Close".... in making you want to reach for that garbage pail to catch the chunky bits coming up.
I like how they act like 1879 was sooooo long ago.....
Why didn't they start back with the apostles who were going door to door with their "watchtower" scrolls and carry it all the way to today?
I like the idea of a parody...maybe of changing doctrines....
Here is a nice list from "NewLight2"
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/4809/1/Old-Light-New-Light-Changes-in-WT-Doctrine
OLD LIGHT - NEW LIGHTORGAN TRANSPLANTS
1967-1980: prohibited as "cannibalism" WT 11/15/67 p.702
Since 1980 - permitted WT 3/15/80 p.31VACCINATIONS
1931-1952 Prohibited as being a "direct violation of the everlasting covenant."
Golden Age 2/4/31 p.293
Since 1952 - permitted WT 12/15/52 p.764and AWAKE! 8/22/65 p.20ORGANIZATION - ITS IMPORTANCE
1893 - No organization today WT 1893 p.266
1894 - Not part of the Lord's plan. WT 12/1/1894 p. 384
1895 - Beware of organization WT 9-15-1895 p.216
1955 - Respect the organization Qualified to be Ministers, 1955, p.380
1957 - Obedience to organization. WT 5/1/57 p.274
1972 - Submit to headship (Governing Body) WT 12-15-72 p.755
1983 - Essential part of the Lord's plan WT 2/15/83 p.12PYRAMIDOLOGY
Prior to 1928 - "God's Stone Witness and Prophet" Used to predict dates Thy Kingdom Come, 1891, p.313, 16, 17, 342, 362
Since 1928 - Satan's Bible; not God's Stone Witness. WT 11/15/28 p.344
1928 - Satan's Bible WT 11-15-28 p.841
1930 - Just a pile of stones Light II, 1930, p.286ROMANS 13:1 - WHO ARE THE "SUPERIOR AUTHORITIES?"
1886 - Earthly governments Divine Plan of the Ages, 1886, p.266
1889 - Earthly governments Time Is At Hand, 1889, p.81
1932-1963: God and Christ Vindication, Vol. 3, 1932, p.13 and The Truth Shall
Make You Free, 1943, p.312
1952 - God and Christ Let God Be True, 1952, p.248
1959 - God and Christ Jehovah's Witnesses in the Divine Purpose, p.91
1963 - Earthly political governments WT 1/1/63 p.31
1975 - Earthly political governments 1975 Yearbook, p.238 1980 - Earthly political governments WT 5/15/80 p.4THE REVELATION NAMES "APOLLYON" AND "ABADDON"
Refers to Satan - The Finished Mystery, p.159
Refers to Jesus Christ - Then Is Finished the Mystery of God, p.232WHO IS "THE TRUE LORD?"
Jesus Christ WT 9-15-83 p.19
Jehovah God WT 7-1-89 p.30THE "ALPHA AND OMEGA"OF REVELATION 22:12
Refers to Jehovah God - AWAKE! 8/22/78 p.28
Refers to Jesus Christ - WT 10/1/78 p.15
( A major change in just 2 months!)WHO IS MICHAEL THE ARCHANGEL?
Not the Son of God - WT November, 1879, p.4
Jesus not an angel - WT March, 1883, p.456
The Pope of Rome - The Finished Mystery, 1926 Edition, p.188
Jesus Christ, the Son of God - Reasoning From the Scriptures, 1985, p.218SAYING "HELLO" TO DISFELLOWSHIPPED MEMBERS?
1970 NO WT 6/1/70 p.352
1972 NO Organization for Kingdom Preaching..., 1972, p.172
1974 YES WT 8/1/74 pp.464,465 1981 NO WT 9/15/81 p.25WILL THE MEN OF SODOM AND GOMORRA BE RESURRECTED?
1879 YES WT July, 1879 p.8
1952 NO WT 6/1/52 p.338
1965 YES WT 8/1/65 p.479
1988 NO WT 8/1/88 p.31
1988 YES "You Can Live Forever..." p.179 (Old Edition)
1988 NO "You Can Live Forever..." p.179 (New Edition)
1988 YES Insight On The Scriptures, Vol.2, p.985
1988 NO Revelation - Its Grand Climax p.273WHEN WAS THE 'SECOND PRESENCE' OF JESUS CHRIST?
1874 - Harp of God, 1921, p.234
1874 - WT 1/1/24 p.5
1874 - Creation, 1927, p.289
1874 - Prophecy, 1929, p.65
1914 - AWAKE! 4/22/57 pp. 11,12
1914 - From Paradise Lost to Paradise Regained, 1958, p.170
1914 - God's Kingdom of a Thousand Years..., 1973, pp. 209,210
1914 - You Can Live Forever..., 1982, p.147The Society said in the Watchtower issue of WT 1/15/93 p.5 "The
Watchtower has consistently presented evidence to honesthearted students of Bible prophecy that Jesus' presence in heavenly Kingdom power began in 1914.""CONSISTENTLY"? After examining the above quotes, is this true?WHO IS THE "FAITHFUL AND DISCREET SLAVE?"
a. All anointed Watchtower members - JWS in the Divine Purpose, p.68
b. Brother Russell filled the office of special "servant" - WT 3/1/23 p.6
c. From 1896 to 1916 - Watchtower founder, Charles Taze Russell The
Finished Mystery, 1917, p.5
d. Charles Taze Russell - The finished Mystery, 1917, p.53
e. Spiritual Israelites: the 'anointed' Society members - From Paradise Lost to Paradise Regained, 1958, p.193
f. The Watchtower admits earlier view that Russell was considered "the
Servant" Jehovah's Witnesses in the Divine Purpose, 1959, p.69
g. A "class" of individuals - 1975 Yearbook, p.88
h. "Russell disavowed being the Servant." - God's Kingdom of a Thousand Years..., 1973, pp.345,346
i. The Society asserts that it never published a biography of Pastor Russell - Jehovah's Witnesses in the Divine Purpose, 1959, p.63
j. But here are the Introductory pages of the Society's Biography of Pastor Russell - The Divine Plan of the Ages, 1927 Ed., p.1(So, why the cover-up?)k. Because in this Biography Russell admitted in private that HE was "the Servant" - The Divine Plan of the Ages, 1927 Ed., p.7
who's the clown in the suit? I didn't watch the video, can't take wtbts garbage any more
Watchtower and Awake. I never light my fireplace without one.
No other magazine comes close ... our pile of sh$t is much higher!!!!!!!!!!!!
No other magazine comes close...to publishing so many presumptous and failed prophecies, predictions and complete and utter bollox.
No other magazine comes close? Thank God for that...
The Watchtower ™
Lining Bird Cages for Over 130 Years
