Hello all, just wanted to update you all on my further steps in the exiting process (a process that may never end in some respects)
To set up a context for my update: my story in a nutshel-
Did a quick fade in the fall of 2009 to start going to university and escape a very unhappy living situation. My exhusband disappeared back in 2006, I was in my mid 20's and couldn't remarry because there was no proof of adultery or death. The CO at the time told me I had to remain loyal to the organization by remaining spiritually singe until the new order. I was marked when I sought a legal divorce in order to escape my financial burdens (I was left with a house and two cars with no secular skills to obtain employment substancial enough to pay for these on my own). I tried to committ suicide due to isolation and lonliness, but fortunately was unsuccessful.
I wanted to exit and still maintain a bit of a relationship with my JW mom. I prepared myself for losing everyone else, but my mom I wanted to keep. Well after I quit meetings I endured spying and slander from the local elders, and emotional blackmail for me and my mother (many warnings to her to cut off association with me). I had to lie and assure her that I have done nothing to get me df'd, she told me that if it came out that I did that she would have to shun me. Thus I have gone through extensive hiding in order to keep the status quo.
The week my dog died I found my ex on facebook (under an alias name) and was able to link to court documents to prove that indeed he got remarried over 4 years ago. I had my proof at last. I presented it to my mother, she was estatic exclaiming "I am going to give this to the elders!". I told her that I doubted that they would care about this information, I only wanted to show it to you- I am free now in your eyes, and I am going to date whomever I choose. That was met with silence.
Now a month later, I have told her about Coffee Shop Guy (we just started dating, wink, wink). She does not respond to anything about my bf, but she does continue to talk with me and let me do things for her around the house like a good daughter should.
I do feel lighter now not having to hide Coffee Shop Guy, and I will introduce her to him soon I hope.
I am now a junior in college and looking forward to getting my undergrad and entering grad school down the road! Life is finally happening for me, as that a-hole CO said to me after telling me that I must remain loyal..."CHG, doing nothing gets nothing". Words to live by....you must do something for your happiness.
Thats all for now!
CHG
