I was a pretty smart kid, after high school when most of the good jws I grew up with were in the full time ministry I choose to go to college, I never wanted to pioneer even though my siblings were and we had like 30 of them in the cong. After my first year of college I fell into the jw peer pressure and joined the full time ministry while still being a full time student. Since there were so many pioneers I could easily hide and fib on my time sheet. I hated pioneer school and was looking forward to when I was to stop the full time ministry. But then my sister wanted to help a smaller cong and I followed suit and stayed on the list, although I remember one pioneer meeting with the co and he was gushing about this being the best career and I was thinking really, then why am I miserable? The older I got the less I fibbed on the time sheet and I was actually spending the time out in service. I had some good friends pioneering, but I did really suck at it. I hated making rvs I felt like I was bothering the people but the only requirement for pioneering is putting in the hours and I did all through college, grad school and then working full time. I did not love pioneering but it just became routine, even after waking up to the "truth" I continued to pioneer for a little bit, it wasn't until they told me that I had the "privilege" of going to pioneer school again that I knew I couldn't do this anymore, I was completely lieing to myself. So I came off the list and since then I've had a spence of calm and less episodes with anxiety and depression. My sister thinks I'm crazy for coming off and asks regularrly when I plan on going back on the list. She's really going to think I'm insane when one day, I leave this religion...
Full time ministry Joy--or Lack Thereof
by WTWizard 16 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
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mrbunyrabit
wow lostinthought... i really thought i was the only one feeling like that...
They deleted me about 5months ago from being a ministerial servant because i almost stopped doing Fs,,, maybe 1hour a month. Until the day i had to go to university when the CO was there and i missed their secret meeting... That following weekend i got deleted (in secret of Corse, they still have to send a letter to the "Organization" to tell them I’m deleted, then they tell everyone you aren’t one any more)
So any way, I’m still in cause it SUCKS BALLS trying to get out... Especially if you like some one in the cong.... but i think I’ll kill myself if I have to go to the Cong for the rest of my life!.. i dont think i can take allot of this anymore... So far, im just holding out…
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Recovery
A similar inquiry made to the prophets Jeremiah and Ezekiel:
Doesn't the Bible say Jehovah will pour out a floodgate of blessings upon those who do his will? Well, I'm sorry, I just don't see how anyone can think being a full-time prophet of Jehovah is a blessing in any sense of the word. How many times were you beat and spit upon Jeremiah? I've lost count. Ezekiel, you had to lie on your side for 390 days. How in the world can anybody call that a blessing? Surely, there is no way you benefitted from being put in cisterns (Jeremiah), or having to lie on your side (390 days). 99% of people are apathetic to your message anyway. It doesn't matter how much preaching you do. There were prophets before you (Micah, for example) and they didn't listen to them. You are wasting time preaching to them. You have been declaring the same message for over 23 years now and nothing has happened. Nobody has listened. If you add the time of the previous and contemporary prophets who declared a similar message, you have over 300 years of combined preaching and the people as a whole will still be killed, according to your so-called prophets. How long have you been saying the day of Jehovah is near for now?
I also can't say why a loving God who brings blessings upon you would tell you not to marry, Jeremiah. Surely, you need a support system. "Normal" men get married and have children. What type of blessing is it to have to be alone and old, by yourself after so many years of full time prophesying for your precious Jehovah? After all the beatings and the spitting and the mocking and the humilliation and the apathy you've been facing after all these years, the least he could "bless" you with is a wife. Even your secretary Baruch is tired of the same monotonous routine of going in the court gates and near the same walls of Jerusalem and preaching this same message of destruction.
And Ezekiel, Jehovah told you not to show any emotion/remorse when your wife died. He isn't going to give you another one in place of her? After all your years of full time prophesying, that's certainly one of the least things he could do for you. And on top of all your faithfulness, you end up going into exile with the rest of the idol worshippers and even the women who boiled their children alive. How have you benefitted from full time prophesying at all? What do you have to show for it? How can anybody be happy or feel blessed in these circumstances?
Jeremiah and Ezekiel I think you might want to rethink full time prophesying. Or maybe you be like Urijah and flee to Egypt and stop prophesying for Jehovah. But wait, Jehovah would probably allow you to be killed for your disobedience. Wow, you're screwed no matter what you do. You're trapped in this horrible, unhappy, monotonous, unfulfilling, unjoyful full time prophesying work. I feel so sorry for you.
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lostinthought
Recovery, I'm just going to repeate what others have already told you: you are disobeying Jehovah by posting here, and there are some serious consequences for disobeying Jehovah...
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Recovery
Yes, of course....the usual fear tactics to scare a JW. Did you get that 'insight' on our fear of disobeying Jehovah and the FDS from Ray Franz or was it another one?
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I Want to Believe
It does seem like Recovery had a good point though; Jeremiah and Ezekiel were royally screwed over and would have been better off never listening to Jehovah. They never got any blessings. Those who worship Jehovah always get the short end of the stick.
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OneDayillBeFree
Man the new guy sure is creepy! Like not just to the ones out of the Borg but to the JWs still in! Like what the hades man?? if I was only a study or a guy/girl who saw two witnesses pass by my neighborhood and found this place trying to do some research on Jehovah's witness's I'd immediately be freaked out and never even open the door to them! And if I was a brother/sister who was in the wake up state I'd be like well that settles it, this religion is crazy! I mean seriously buddy Reeco, who's side are you even on man/miss?
But anyway, while I was doing the full time ministry I can truthfully say that it was some of the worst time of my life! Never felt joy at all! Now as just another brother in the hall I feel so much better!
But seriously Reeco, take it easy buddy!