One Random Dude's Conclusion about the WTBTS based on an Awake he Got

AuntBee

We just chat occasionally through my blog. He's a twenty-something. I've tried several times to tell him stuff about the WT, but he's in that know-it-all stage, and prefers talking to listening. Oh well... Here's his take on it, after receiving an Awake. I guess it shows the purpose the "Awake" serves; it's so low-key it can disarm people?

"That reminds me, I was handed an issue of "awake" magazine, the companion mag to the watchtower and I skimmed it - it's practically a secular magazine, they just give a scripture verse every now and then and talk about things barely related to the bible. The cover story is "Is your food safe?" They go on for pages then talk a little about hygene in the bible. I tell ya they're going the way of the church of england and getting all mellow and secular. I think this is a good thing because christianity does much better as a philosophy than a "religion" imo."

"all mellow and secular".....

yadda yadda 2

He sure has judged them wrong hasn't he. Don't judge a religion by its cover (or one Awake).

I was in the borg for nearly 40 years and never really saw the point of the Awake magazine. As that guy noted, it goes on and on for pages about all manner of random non-religious stuff, mostly only making a token reference to God and a scripture or two at the end of the article. There are usually only a couple of directly bible related articles each issue. Eventually I'm sure they will scrap it.

cptkirk

duh? they have to uphold the tenants of the UN so...

did you read the paragraph and underline it? make sure you raise your hand and read what you underlined...

i'm sure it does some good anyway....it takes people like me and raises my level of power in the world from moderate to extreme...

you have to learn to love all aspects of life....love abundance and yet love poverty at the same time....love war and yet peace also......

when you learn to love madness, then you know you are close to level 10.....then, you will get your special pair of underwear.

mother teresa knew this....but she lost balance and cracked..old age will do that unfortunately.....

don't worry, soon more war will come and sharpen the jaw of some, for the sake of those that will be signers of the new mandate. who are you?

the truth is, more than likely you are a nobody....why? because you cannot even bear (as a weight) the beginning of my words.....

don't you know, it's not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get it. this is 99.9% of the population. if you master these words, you will receive the power of karma, and yet, this great power, is only the beginning of real power (obtainable by man)

you really don't think i get what some of those guys on here are doing? lololol i mastered their greatest level of achievement by the time i was 4 years old.

i will soon stand in the place of power (my trumpet has already sounded).....and trust me, life for everyone will be much more interesting and enjoyable, a rollback of sorts. the jdubs got one thing right, endurance is paramount.

Billy the Ex-Bethelite

The Awake is still WTBTS' idea of what a college education provides.

JimmyPage

I always preferred the Awake over the Watchtower. I just never gave a flip about what some bearded guys in robes and sandals did thousands of years ago and what bullcrap meaning it supposedly had for our day.

cobaltcupcake

Please. Back in the 70s they had an article in Awake entitled, "Are You Plagued With Loose Bowels?" and another, "The Mighty Carrot."

Yeah, that ought to have 'em flocking to the KH!

http://scottleblog.wordpress.com

The Odd Life of Jehovah's Witnesses

kurtbethel

Studies in Crap

5 Hilarious Images of Social Media From Free Jehovah's Witness Magazine

By Alan Scherstuhl Mon., Feb. 6 2012 at 7:00 AM 61 Comments Categories: Studies in Crap

?Your Crap Archivist brings you the finest in forgotten and bewildering crap culled from Golden State thrift stores, estate sales, and flea marketshanded to him at the train station.

Awake! magazine

Date: February, 2012
Publisher: Watchtower Bible and Tract Society of Pennsylvania

Questions This Cover Raises: "What Should You Know About Social Networking?" and, in tiny type at the bottom, "How Should We Pray to God?" Ping Him!

A chipper little magazine that at first seems to be about what a joy it is not to be asleep, Awake! is the fun younger sister to the dour old maid that is The Watchtower, which claims to be the world's most widely read magazine thanks to the seven million or so Jehovah's Witnesses who go door to door gathering subscribers. The distribution system is like Grit's or Girl Scout Cookies or the fundraisers my high school ran to pay for proms, except instead of prizes or a DJ your reward for moving magazines is not going to hell.

They also give out Awake!, which I guess is meant to make the faith seem more cheerful than what The Watchtower does. Compare the current covers:

A proselytizer handed me both the easygoing Awake! and the terrifying Watchtower at the same time. Bundling them together is something like giving out a collection of Marilyn Vos Savant columns with a copy of John Hersey's Hiroshima.

I'm glad I took them, though, because I learned five new things from Awake!'s cover story on social networking: 1. Nothing's more delightful than Facebooking with gloves on:

2. Even as studies reveal that Americans are incapable of safely operating motor vehicles while sending text messages, African women can SMS while balancing fruit on their heads.

Note that her network includes a med student, a young woman who is Googling "how to resist eating this muffin," and a musical theater costume designer's idea of a farmer.

3. Social networking takes two steps.

Seriously, that's Awake!'s entire list.

4. Privacy is a concern. Also, it feels really creepy to do social networking in a room where you've put up paranoid-eye wallpaper.

5. While social networking, it is not uncommon for you to be visited by 1980s global-pop supergroup USA for Africa.

So it turns out that this religion that so highly values in-person contact is a little iffy on why exactly people use social media. But it's easy to overlook the thinness of that cover story and get sucked right into these of-the-moment real-world concerns shared by the 25 million who purportedly get The Watchtower each month:

Other Questions They Should Answer: Will the World's End Reduce Your Number of Twitter Followers? What Should I Do if The God of Love Defriends Me? Igloos: What Wireless Plan Works Best?

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